Tuesday, May 18, 2010

safe auto jingle

Has anyone seen this new Safe Auto insurance commercial? I find it bizarre. Apparently, the company had a nationwide (no pun intended) jingle contest and the winner would receive the highest honor of appearing in a new commercial. No wonder John Kerry threw away his Vietnam era Purple Heart. If he looked less like a hybrid Herman Munster/Frankenstein and sounded more like Justin Beiber, he could have written a jingle for Safe Auto or in his case, probably AIG.


Alright, now that you've been exposed to this nonsense - Just who is this corpulent black woman? I've seen plenty of commercials in my time, but I don't think I've ever seen a morbidly obese woman glorified in this manner. It must be part of some greater strategy. So I did some minimal research. I've seen other Safe Auto commercials and they seem to utilize the following themes:

* we provide the least amount of insurance required by law for low income citizens.
* if you don't have insurance, you'll be arrested and your life will be screwed.

Just an aside, I've also noticed their predisposition for repeatedly using interracial couples in their ads. I find that interesting because it tends to be rare. With the emergence of this new "Justin Case" ad, and his Michael Jackson-dance-hat-throw, it just made me wonder, "What the fuck is this?" And who the hell is this enormous, hip-hoppin-no-necked ebony goddess? Who is she? Well get this. It's the daughter of the marginally famous ReRun character from the 1970's sitcom What's Happening!* Apparently, her name is Lady ReRun! I read her bio and she's an aspiring actor/dancer/singer/rapper/song writer. Sounds about right.

Lady ReRun is a battle tested warrior as you surely can tell. She has overcome the societal disadvantage of her 4'11"/280lb frame and I suspect all the ensuing diabetic & circulation issues related to childhood obesity. If you click on the following link, you'll see a candid portrayal of her road to thespian fulfillment...

http://dothejingle.safeauto.com/SeeThe Jingles.aspx?vid=122

Now seriously, what the fuck was that? She's like lounging poolside. I mean, like, ya know, I'm gonna enter this Safe Auto contest. Like, it'll be great if I win. And like, it'll be fun too. It's like, I got nuthin' to lose! For the sake of mother fucking God, this bullshit is on Safe Auto's corporate website. It's as if they're embracing this jibber jabber. Even Mr. T's more eloquent. And why does the clip subtly try to imply that it's a pool at her home? There's nobody else lounging around poolside. I'm guessing it was a Hampton Inn at 8am on the outskirts of Hotlanta.

It seems to me that Safe Auto is trying to secure the niche for one of the fastest growing segments of the population - low income, overweight, minority status & minimal education. Sorry if that sounds politically incorrect. Just calling it like I see it.

I also took a look at some geographical statistics. Here are the "fattest" regions of the United States in descending order...

East South Central > Alabama, Kentucky, Mississippi & Tennessee
West South Central > Arkansas, Louisiana, Oklahoma & Texas
East North Central > Illinois, Indiana, Michigan, Ohio & Wisconsin

Now here are the states where you can currently purchase insurance from Safe Auto (their corporate headquarters is based in Columbus, Ohio)...

Arizona Illinois Mississippi Oklahoma Tennessee
Georgia Kentucky Missouri Pennsylvania Texas
Indiana Louisiana Ohio South Carolina

See any overlap? Is this a mere coincidence? I doubt it. I think they're purposely trying to target the aforementioned segments of society. Now if you know me, you know I have this utter revulsion for insurance companies of any ilk. They really have become the scourge of society. This reminds me of the cigarette companies targeting young children. Lady Rerun is like, representin', like ya know, that Joe Camel guy. Seriously, she even has the extra humps or in this case... lumps.

* - ReRun also starred in the sitcom's brief, 3 week long revival "What's Happening NOW"


Anonymous said...

My other problem with Lady Rerun's "jingle" - it harbors absolutely no similarities to being a jingle whatsoever. All she does is mention that safe auto is there 24/7 and doesn't necessitate a credit check. Then she asks herself if Justin Case can do some kind of blob-like dance move. When he storms the office and proves himself capable, she mutters "Oh Crap!"
That's a jingle??? And what's even more disingenuous, are we really to believe she wrote that commentary? Would Lady ReRun really be concerned about the necessity of a credit check? I highly doubt it. SAF

Anonymous said...

"Oh crap". "Blob like dance move" LOL!
I wish there was a link to put this on my Facebook. This is hilarious.

Anonymous said...

I would enjoy Lady Rerun disrobing and exposing her many lady lumps. Anyone can ascertain that she possesses a fine gunt. Dixy

Anonymous said...

I would enjoy Lady Rerun disrobing and exposing her many lady lumps. Anyone can ascertain that she possesses a fine gunt. Dixy

Anonymous said...

Are you kidding me with these commercials? You are rude unprofessional, insulting and pornographic. I wouldn't buy dirt from you.

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