Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Robin Williams suicide solution to the artificially generated stampede

I've explored countless ways to inform the general public about the prospect of artificially generated stampedes.  Simply put, it's the modern day equivalent of shouting "fire" in a crowded theater.  The notion that someone could saturate a football stadium or large entertainment venue with panic-inducing information or a phony evacuation order is so ridiculously generic, it boggles the mind that it hasn't been attempted in the United States (I say that because attempts have already occurred in India, and to a lesser extent, central Africa).

And still, nobody has the guts to broach the subject.  I can understand why the NFL and NCAA shy away from discussing it --- foreseeable litigation.  And the government --- plausible deniability and the unfathomably high risk/reward return ratio.

But seriously, isn't there someone out there with some common sense practicality who thinks beyond themselves?  Someone who'd be willing to look out for the greater good?  Someone not obsessed with the accumulation of wealth?  Someone who just wants to do the right thing?  Regardless of his depression or mental anxiety issues, Robin Williams struck me as that type of individual.

I referenced Bob Barker's "Help control the pet population.  Have your pets spayed or neutered" campaign in my latest book.   There was a moral justification for uttering those words at the end of every Price is Right episode.  He wasn't trying to profit.  He just didn't want to see kittens and puppies experience abandonment, suffering or needless starvation.  When nobody else was willing to speak on behalf of the cause, he took it to the next level.  He super-empowered himself beyond the status of legendary game show host.

I've considered all kinds of individuals that might be willing to broach the subject of the artificially generated stampedes.  Senator Joe Manchin (D-WV) from the political realm would be an ideal candidate.  From an artistic standpoint, Pearl Jam seems well suited.  From a conspiratorial perspective, former Minnesota Governor Jesse Ventura has a sizable social media following.  WWE President Vince McMahon from the world of sports entertainment could use it as a story line --- how he made a moral decision to protect the populace since the government was unwilling.  I even wrote a piece about Barack Obama stepping up to the plate.  All of this material is on the AGSAF website.

Suffice to say, even if they came across the information, I doubt any of them would be interested.  They'd likely run in the other direction, faster than if there were an actual stampede.  Acknowledging this issue takes a lot of innards (an abundance of guts, courage, temerity, impudence, effrontery, and so on).

There is one unorthodox solution to the stampedes that I'd never considered... until the past few days.  In the aftermath of the Robin Williams suicide, I couldn't help but notice the outpouring of sympathy and emotion on social media.  Everything, and I mean everything, seemed to take a backseat for a couple days.  It was as if time stood still. 

It was hard not to notice how there's always a great deal of interest in whether or not the person left a "suicide note."  Could be a sense of morbid curiosity or just the regular nib-nosiness of Americans, but people seem fascinated by the rationale and justification for killing oneself.  The stardom and juicy gossip angle fuels even greater speculation.   Was it financial?  Exposed affair?  Personal humiliation? etc.  If the suicide note had substantive content beyond the norm, it would immediately go viral.

So here's my plea to any high profile celeb who's pondering suicide as a "way out."  If by chance, you were to come into contact with this blog and have a strong hunch that you are going to prematurely end your life --- PLEASE consider leaving a suicide note that comprehensively outlines the dangers of obsolete emergency evacuation protocol for large, confined crowds.  Feel free to reference my site.  The reverberations of such a suicide note would be heard from Los Angeles to New York City and every municipality in between.  And as ridiculous as this may sound, I'd gladly take the heat and collective venom from those who thought I personally contributed to your demise.

Suicide is widely regarded as the ultimate selfish act.  Not sure where I stand on that one, but if you wish to mitigate the exposure to your "tarnished legacy" or "sullied reputation"... well... it's just something to think about.  Hey, why not solve a future, hypothetical asymmetric national security issue?  You may have taken your own life, but were always concerned with the welfare of others.  Call me crazy, but I think that would be one helluva statement.  In hindsight, Robin Williams could have been the perfect "stampede messiah."


Anonymous said...

This is the stupidest shit I have ever read.

eric saferstein said...

Yeah... telling fans that LEGIT emergency stadium evacuation orders do NOT come from your personal cell phone. Hint - they use the public address system in tandem with the video screens.

Yeah, that's some really stupid shit. Just glad you're not in a position of authority or command.

Anonymous said...

No really, this is stupid. I'm not usually that crass, but there's no better word for it. What your asking and your concern encapsulates stupidity.

Anonymous said...

Yeah I know, your / you're. Whatever.

eric saferstein said...

You need to explain WHY it's so stupid. Just gimme SOMETHING.

Anonymous said...

I'm circling back from my previous comment. You are suggesting that Robin Williams should have left a suicide note outling your ridiculous theory. That is truly stupid. You were attempting to capitalize on a man's decision to end his life to promote your bullshit theory. Low. In bad taste. Awful. Basically the stupidest shit I've ever read. Is that enough explanation for you?

eric saferstein said...

I'm suggesting that if he knew he was going to kill himself, why not improve the current state of humanity.

My material, whether you think it's ridiculous or in bad taste, is really just common sense, very generic, public safety information. A lot like "stop drop and roll" or "look both ways before you cross the street."

Ever wonder why NOBODY'S allowed to talk about something so blatantly obvious?