Thursday, January 05, 2017


I'm having difficulty getting over the fact that Donald Trump will be our next Commander in Chief.  It's not a mater of me being pro-Hillary.  Although I did think she was especially well-qualified.  In fact, I thought virtually all of the Republican candidates were relatively competent.  I might disagree with their views on social issues, civil rights, defense spending, trickle down economics, etc...  but this doesn't mean I think they're all unfit to serve.

Now the god-fearing religious extremism does scare the living diarrhea out of my colon.  So yeah, Santorum was sufficiently terrifying.  Not to mention Ted Cruz and Mike Huckabee.  E-gad!  But I've never questioned their intellectual capabilities or intellectual curiosity.  I simply came to the realization that regarding the majority of issues, both foreign and domestic, we're on opposite sides of the political spectrum.  Hey, I get it.  That's American politics in 2016.  Let's be honest.  The shit can get pretty polarizing.

Then along came the Trump Train.  And plenty of passengers hopped on bored.  Oops, wait a minute, I actually meant "hopped on board."  Hard to believe I didn't catch that accidental homonym.  I usually write as I think.

Hopefully you get the sarcastic verbiage here.  ALL ABOARD!  Not ALL ABORT.  Well, except maybe for those northern 'Women for Trump' supporters in liberal Massachusetts.  Damn taxpayer funded abortions destroying the economy!

Soooo... what makes Trump different from all the losers and enemies he has defeated?  What sets him apart from all the other candidates?  What makes him different?

Is it about education?  Gotta be honest here.  I simply don't have the desire to research the intellectual pedigree of a Chris Christie.  I'm sure he went to the Jersey Boardwalk of Hard Knocks or the Arby's University of King Beef (with horsey) or whatever.  However, I'm pretty confident that all the other candidates had high school diplomas and college degrees.  FYI --- Ben Carson got his medical degree from Anal Roberts University.  Ironically, he settled on becoming a neurosurgeon after the prospect of a career in proctology went down the toilet.

For the record, Trump spent two years at Fordham University and then transferred to the University of Pennsylvania where he received a Bachelor's degree in Economics from the esteemed Wharton School of Business.  Well done.

But then this happened...

The tweet was fixed an hour later.  I think it's safe to assume that one of his lackeys saw the blunder and had the dubious distinction of correcting their boss... a self-avowed "smart man with a great brain."

Just an aside --- is it me or does anyone else have issues with individuals who explicitly tell you how they're very smart, or very rich, or very important.  Who in the name of fucking Christ talks like that?  And regardless of their fame or fortune, why on earth would you take them seriously?

Now I'm familiar with the Trump mindset that "all publicity is good publicity."  But I think even he knew, somewhere in dark corner of his orange-skinned cerebellum, that something had gone askew.  Or did he?  Even worse, assuming he did, would he actually care?  Would it really bother him or would he simply just change the subject?

So why can't I let that one tweet go.  Why can't I give Trump a pass?  Especially since I've been equally guilty of the same mistake!

Back in the day, I recall writing an essay.  Not sure what the topic was.  But I used a phrase about how "people take things for granite."  Fortunately, someone informed me about the difference between "granted" and "granite."
Silly me.  Up until that point in my life, I assumed people were saying "granite."  Ya know... it kinda makes sense.  People assume that things have been realistically confirmed.  The information is concrete and easily verified.  Hey, it's as solid as granite.

Here's the problem though.  The individual who offered me grammatical assistance wasn't a business associate or a college professor.  It was my 6th grade English teacher Mrs. Taylor.  At the time, I was 12 years old.  TRUMP IS 70.  The difference is a 58 year learning curve.  21,000+ days.  

So as I see it, here are some takeaways from this quickly forgotten, unpresidented fiasco.

1.  Trump lacks a certain degree of situational awareness regarding his twitter account.  One he uses on a routine, petulant basis.  The manner in which he conveys his concerns have always been flippant and inarticulately aloof.  But this is different on a scary level.  The willingness of a "shoot from the hip," attack-minded President to use big words he doesn't understand or comprehend could have real-world ramifications.  There's a big difference between George W. Bush mispronouncing nuke-u-ler and him actually thinking the word is "new clear."      

2.  No reporter would ever have the balls or ovaries to mention the verbal discrepancy.  Because if they did, they'd be ostracized from the White House press pool in perpetuity.  The "unpresidented tweet" will simply end up in the dust bin of crappy twitter banter, along with all the Kardashian Kanye West nonsense or "how 'bout 'dem Cowboys" bullshit.

I am someone who believes that words have consequences.  Trump doesn't even remotely give a shit about words or literature... or history or humanity.  It's all about Trump.  Trump Vodka --- he doesn't drink.  Trump University --- he doesn't educate.  I think it would be amusing if some Fox News reporter asked him, "Mr. President, do you know how a bill becomes a law?"  Now that would be a defining moment!  Conjunction junction, what's your function?  Picking up words and phrases and clawses (the plural of clause).

3.  Trump is incapable of learning from his mistakes.  History has demonstrated time and time again... that people who fail to acknowledge a mistake, are condemned to repeat it.  But I honestly don't think he gives a shit.  Anytime something like this happens in the future, he'll just interject some offhand alarmist rhetoric, change the subject or lash out against the media with the standard ad hominem demonization remarks (unfair, untrustworthy, disgraceful, disgusting, they lie)

4.  Most important, the twitter incident is clear and convincing evidence that Trump does NOT read.  This is a big deal.  Obama was President of the Harvard Law Review.  Bill Clinton was a voracious reader.  Hillary was a veteran attorney.  Hell, even George W. in his post-presidency does some paint-by-the-numbers stuff.  At least that requires following the directions.

But Trump???  How on earth can a multi-billionaire spend 70 years on this planet and still be unfamiliar with the term "precedent?"  Not to mention the concept of "precedence?"  Keep in mind, this guy is notorious for being involved in hundreds, if not thousands, of lawsuits.  I'm not besmirching him for failing to comprehend the basis of case law and the how the judicial branch operates.  But seriously, this bastion of intellectual superiority will be tasked with appointing the next Supreme Court justice.  The thought of this leaves me apoplectic.  No Donald... neither epileptic nor anorexic.  Apoplectic.  Please note: I'm not saying he "cannot" read.  I've seen him read a teleprompter.  I'm saying he does not read.  No wonder the notion of an intelligence briefing makes him cringe.  Those guys use BIG words like asymmetric, mitigation, remediation, analytics, etc.  Trump using SMALL words like big, huge, great, super, smart, nice, etc. 

Final observation:

I honestly believe that when Trump overhears writers from the Washington Post or reporters from MSNBC saying... his aggressive use of twitter is setting a bad precedent... he most likely hears and thinks the following --- that in effect, those bastards are saying my aggressive use of twitter will make me a bad president.

Now don't get me wrong.  Just about everything Trump says and does makes my testicles retract deep into my upper thigh.  But here's what's truly terrifying --- I don't think we've yet to reach the tip of the iceberg.  God forbid Trump confuses an iceberg with an ISIS burger.  Maybe he'll think the White House chef is a secret Muslim who's trying to poison him.  Not a job I'd want.  Hmmm, then again...

I'd suggest the #unpresidented hash tag be used for every future anti-Trump sentiment on the internet.  After all, it's the greatest... because he created it.  Albeit unknowingly.  Now that's some eye runny!

Even better, the grammatically challenged --- #yourfired

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