Saturday, February 05, 2011

random ideas/observations

Here's a few things I'm thinking about. Nothing too coherent.

I find the weather issues for the Super Bowl in Dallas, Texas to be a source of great amusement. I've always regarded the Super Bowl as generally the biggest "poser" attraction on the planet. For the most part, it's just a bunch of corporate bigshots with over sized wallets and massive egos. And the celebrities always make me nauseous. If it's a commoner who makes the trip, they're probably even worse. An individual with grand aspirations that spent their life savings whose main goal is to just tell everyone they went to the "big" game.

The weather makes it comical. Surely there's a ton of people who have rented limos. Have you ever tried to drive one of those things on ice or bad weather? Well I have and it's a nightmare. The distance with the wheelbase makes it truly terrifying. The back end just sways all over the place. I'd love to see tons of people get in wrecks on the way to the stadium. All their plans ruined.

And I love the fact that all those people bought $200 tickets to stand outside the stadium and watch it on the outdoor wide screens. It's going to be a long day for those outside. Weather calls for 40 degrees. And the staggered checkpoints will make for a long day. Also, no outdoor grilling is permitted for the Super Bowl because of Dept. of Homeland Security concerns. What a joke. Here's what I envision. A bunch of douchebags sitting in their rent-a-cars in a giant parking lot. They all will arrive early because of the potential for bad weather. Then, they'll just sit there with their cars running.

Jerry Jones is going to break the Pasadena Super Bowl attendance record with 105,000. But he'll need to count the idiots standing outside. Lame. I hope he claims that he broke the attendance record and then they call him on it. Thus further exposing his douchebaggery. I really despise dem Cowboys.

And the Dallas/Ft. Worth airport is having all kinds of weather related problems - very kewl.

To my 2 friends who went to Dallas - Do not take offense. This has nothing to do with either of you. In fact, I might check out the scene next year when they have it in Indy. But my goal would be to score a freebie. Considering the scalping ban on site and lack of others trying to score a ticket, I think I'd have a pretty good shot.

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Recipe for the Drink of Excitement:

1 part Stolys, 1 part champagne (not the dry stuff), 1 part pomegranate IZZE, 1 part grapefruit IZZE and 1/2 part pineapple juice. Garnish with a lime.

This beverage is a pure girlie drink, but I've never heard any complaints. All the carbonation really gives it a kick. If you want to use cheap vodka, that's fine - stick with Popov. The IZZE drinks are a little overpriced, but essential. There are no acceptable substitutes.

The Drink of Excitement was formerly known as "Sonofbeverage"

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If you know someone who owns a winery or spirits distribution company, feel free to use either of these ideas.

First, the bottle with the tie-dye shrink wrap design. Similar to the shrink wrap covering used by Georges Dubeuf. Their mid-priced wines feature colorful Picasso inspired pictures of chalets and scenery with diverse, contrasting geometric shapes. It's an attention getter. A bold move to help with product differentiation in the shelves of a very crowded marketplace. Smart.

My idea - use the same basic premise. But the shrink wrap is a variable tie-dye design depending on what type of wine you purchase. The cork is also tie-dyed and synthetic. Both the bottles and corks would be popular for arts and crafts types. Name the brand of wine "FOUR TWENTY" and charge $4.20 per bottle. All the college kids would go apeshit. "You brother, here's a five. Get me a bottle of Four Twenty."
And it takes the marketing angle (critical in the wine business) to a new level.

My other wine idea employs the same concept of using the shrink wrap covering. 2 types - one that is completely fire engine red and the other is colored milk white. On both bottles there is a black outlined picture of a table or fancy looking credenza. As little writing and product info as possible, preferably on the inside of the table picture. The concept here is - ohhhh, I get it RED (the color of the bottle), TABLE (a picture of a table) and the wine is self evident. Red table wine or white table wine. This is so strong because it has a generic appearance. And this way you can charge an outrageous amount because it approaches "novelty" status. If you're going to a dinner party, you hand it to the host and say, "Here you go, I brought some red table wine and white table wine." Great conversation starter. And the corks are also synthetic, respectively solid red and white. I like this idea even more than the Four Twenty brand. One is low end, the other is high end. I should really give the latter idea to Kathy Papidimitriou. Definitely the next time I see her.

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Why do people use that gay-ass "check in" application on facebook? Ahhh super cool... I see you had lunch at Applebees and needed to share it. It's kind of like - not only am I proud of my lameness and poor decision making process, but I really need the world to know. Can't wait to check in at Red Lobster this Saturday night. I'm contemplating using my own check in information... but in the status update area.

Saf checked in at the Woodsdale Hampton Inn and is enjoying a fine continental breakfast.
Saf checked in at the Oglebay cabins and is stealing firewood.
Saf checked in at Wheeling Jesuit computer lab and is printing out 500 copies of his anti-religious propaganda. The printer is making unsettling, whirring noises - LOL!
Saf just checked in/snuck in to Consol Energy Center.
Saf hopes to check into Bristol Palin's vagina.
Two Jehovah Witnessii just checked in at my front door. How the fuck did you get all the way up this hill? Get the hell outta here! Didn't you see my neighbor Fuckface's joke of a "Private Drive" sign.

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I might try a few more of these kinds of blogs. They're a little more pleasant than teaching people how to kill without using weapons or bashing The Metropolitan Grill (although their lunch salads are still the best).

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love how all the big "Pre-party festivities" in Dallas are completely fucked. Judging from the news - this entire tribute to Jerry Jones' monster ego has been one colossal, abysmal failure. Now if my idea for the Superbowl stunt happens, we're really in for it.

Anonymous said...

Love this one! A nice change of pace!
DBV