Rick Santorum will be spreading "something" when he visits the Steubenville Big Red High School gymnasium on the eve of Super Tuesday. That "something" will likely be a victory speech regardless of whether he wins or finishes a close second.
So what would happen if I wore this Obama for President ball cap to a Rick Santorum Super Tuesday "victory" rally?
Would they even let me in the door? Would they force me to remove the ball cap (like Elaine's Baltimore Orioles cap she sported at Yankee Stadium in the George Steinbrenner seats)? Would they make me turn it inside out? Would they deny me entry based on their "concern for my personal safety?" Would I be required to show a photo ID to attend a free, public political event in the United States of America? Would I be forced to answer a bunch of questions? Would they expressly prohibit me from being interviewed or within view of the cameras?
Seriously, what exactly would happen to me? Would I get beat up by a bunch of old white men/Tea Party activists? Would a mob of girl-scout aged Santorum supporters heckle me and kick me in the shins? I honestly don't have a clue.
When I went to the Sarah Palin speech at Brush Run Park in St. Clairsville (2008) they had a very strict "no sign" policy. All homemade signs had to be forfeited at the entry point. Then of course, you were handed a mass produced red, white and blue 8.5" by 12" COUNTRY FIRST sign. How awe-inspiring was that? But this isn't even a sign. It's just a ball cap. I saw far worse at the recent Arizona debate. Outside the auditorium in Mesa, the CNN camera zoomed in on a guy holding a "Spreading Santorum sign" which visibly stated the words "fecal matter." And how about all those Phish heads that hold up "Fluffhead" signs at political rallies?
And what if a bunch of us went? Let's say I had an Obama ball cap. Another person had a Mitt Romney ball cap. And another person had a Ron Paul ball cap? Hell, maybe even throw in a Tim Pawlenty one. Talk about an ebay auction close-out item. Jesus Christ! 50 Pawlenty hats for $10.00. That's way worse than those New England Patriot 2012 Superbowl Champions t-shirts worn by everyone in Central America, and to a lesser extent, Ghana.
Just for the record, I've never worn this ball cap in public. I found it at Wheeling Jesuit University's outdoor track in 2008. It was hanging on a fence. I brought it home and threw it in the washing machine.
If I go through with this experiment, I won't be doing anything to cause trouble. No other propaganda whatsoever. I'll only be wearing the hat. My other attire will be pretty basic. Just the standard blue jeans and a polo shirt. I won't be throwing on one of those multi-colored end zone Jesus afro wigs. I'll just be my normal, bland self.