#492. O Cardi B.

I often think about "baby bump bling."  Despite the fact that I have no children (except the cats), I'm seriously considering starting a line of premium "Orthodox Jew baby bump garb."  Mostly in the realm of colorful, yarmalke adornments and traditional Tzitzit.  Think in terms of Cardi B.... but with a George Costanza vibe.  I'm calling it "Oy Vey."  That's short for "Oy Voy is the Way."

Cardi B. shows off her zygotic, embryonic, fetalistic, hippity-hoppin' bump at last night's BET Awards.

 

 

O Cardi B
sonofsaf

O Cardi B, O Cardi B
Your baby bump is hanging
O Cardi B, O Cardi B
Your baby bump is hanging
It’s more than gunt the FUPA’s near
But midsection is not your rear
O Cardi B, O Cardi B
Your baby bump is hanging

O Cardi B, O Cardi B
We’ll measure you completely
O Cardi B, O Cardi B
We’ll measure you completely
Do not drink beer O Cardi B
Do not fuss when you pee pee
O Cardi B, O Cardi B
We’ll measure you completely

O Cardi B, O Cardi B
Your baby bump is hanging
A signal that you’re so fucked up
Your baby bump is hanging
Will all your might, and show and tell
No muff to dive that fishy smell
O Cardi B, O Cardi B
Your baby bump is hanging

 

O Christmas Tree
Unknown

O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
Thy leaves are so unchanging
O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
Thy leaves are so unchanging
Not only green when summer's here
But also when it's cold and drear
O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
Thy leaves are so unchanging


O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
Such pleasure do you bring me
O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
Such pleasure do you bring me
For every year this Christmas tree
Brings to us such joy and glee
O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
Such pleasure do you bring me

O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
You'll ever be unchanging
A symbol of goodwill and love
You'll ever be unchanging
Each shining light, each silver bell
No one alive spreads cheer so well
O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
You'll ever be unchanging

Never seen Cardi B.  No desire really.  'Cause what if someone asked me, "Saf, what did you do last night?"  And I was forced to say, "Ooooh, yeah boy, I went to see Cardi B." 

Please do not share this material with Cardi B.