Personally speaking, I think Jon Gruden got totally fucked... in the ass.
Ironic, eh? But if Jon Gruden ever wants to restore his employment status, whether it's coaching or broadcasting, he'd better do one thing in a Ned Flanders jiffy. And that's FIND the LORD. Psychiatric counseling ain't gonna cut it here.
For some ungodly reason, this cycle of reasoning applies and appeals to about half the country (oh that is so wonderful... you found the lord). Making it the perfect litmus test. The perfect get out of jail free card.
So if Rude Grude goes down that path, may I make a suggestion. Learn how to "kick it" with Jesus Christ. Now is not the time to take a flyer on Mohammed or some Hindu elephant Jehovah bullshit witness. Hmm, Trump might work. Just start openly worshiping the Orange Prolapse. Who knows? Goodell might dish out a generous bribe just to $HUT... HIM... THE... FUCK... UP.
Wouldn't it be totally insane if Gruden just said fuck it all. Totally went rogue and transforms himself into this anti-politically correct, sporty equivalent of the Orange Prolapse. Maybe even run for Senate. Hey, Chucky lives in Tampa, Florida. He could primary Lil' Marco Rubio from the far right. Now that... would be a hoot.
Jon Gruden
sonofsaf
You may think I’m bullish with a cock market play,
Homos are gay, they are so gay,
Didn’t mean to cuss, had plenty to say,
Was Raiders head coach Jon Gruden
John Gruden, Colin Kaepernick took a knee
Jon Gruden, AIDS kills faggots dead,
Jon Gruden, not an anti-football pussy,
I'm bad so bad my name is Jon Gruden
Emails in which I cussed, all were sent for free
All queers get laid, and I want paid,
Assholes are a fraud, I really do believe,
All queers are dead, I’m Jon Gruden.
John Gruden, Colin Kaepernick took a knee
Jon Gruden, AIDS kills faggots dead,
Jon Gruden, no an anti-football pussy,
I'm bad so bad my name is Jon Gruden
I'm bad so bad my name is Jon Gruden.
Born Again
Evie
You may think it's foolish what I'm going to say,
I'm not ashamed, no not ashamed,
One day I prayed Jesus, take my sin away,
And that's when I was born again
Born again, there's really been a change in me,
Born again, just like Jesus said,
Born again, and all because of calvary,
I'm glad so glad that I've been born again
One man came to Jesus, john and chapter 3,
Oh so afraid, oh so afraid,
Master your from God, I really do believe,
And Jesus said, be born again.
Born again, there's really been a change in me,
Born again, just like Jesus said,
Born again, and all because of calvary,
I'm glad so glad that I've been born again
I'm glad so glad that I've been born again.
Oakland Raiders:
9-15-02, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA
12-7-03, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA
12-6-09, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA
11-21-10, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA
11-8-15, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA
Hey Saffy, do you sing any Christian hymns? Surprisingly, that's a reasonable question. And it's an affirmative! Once a year I mutteringly hum along to the following lyrics...
“Christ is risen from the dead, trampling down death by death, and on those in the tombs bestowing life!”
While I'm not entirely certain, I think it has something to do with Romanian Orthodox Easter.
Yinz resurrect that shit, n'at.
Please do not share this material with XXX-Oakland Raiders head coach Jon Gruden.
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