Wednesday, March 29, 2023

#1778. Tennessee Dead

When Fox News starts mocking pro-Second Amendment Congressmen, well you know, that's a pretty bad sign for the extreme right.


In the wake of yesterday's elementary executions in Nashville, Tim "hot chicken" Burchett (R-TN) explained to reporters how they opt to homeschool their daughter.  Fortunately this leaves his immediate family unaffected by school shootings.  Good for him! 

Kind of reminds me of when I explained to my friend Robin about the dangers of artificially generated stampedes (the wireless equivalent of shouting "fire" in a crowded stadium) and the unpleasant prospect of a cascade or domino effect.  She replied, "Well Saf... I don't go to NFL games.  So this wouldn't impact me."  Good for her!

 


Tennessee Dead
sonofsaf

Donald’s an asshole, prolapse stain
Shithead MAGA rallies he will not refrain
Daughter wife’s a Jew married Jared
Transgender attack left Tennessee dead

Knoxville Memphis outskirts red
AR’s are fucked up, with a shooting instead
Well, Stormy’s tits dead ahead
Nashville’s very red with Tennessee dead

Tennessee, Tennessee
Second Amendment keeps us free
Correct, politically
Smackdown Tennessee

Trump is Orange Proud Boys are white
Kushner is a Jew circumcised that’s right
Stormy’s a whore with some real big tits, giving head:
Transgender attack in Tennessee dead

Trump wants to fight he’s outta line
Money, that prick is a-mine all mine
Orange Prolapse clown maybe inbred
Gun attack left Tennessee dead

Tennessee, Tennessee
Critical race your enemy
Correct, politically
Smackdown Tennessee

Trump’s a hog Orange Prolapse blob
In a pig sty he’s a rollin’ fat slob
That slob, is so nasty and inbred:
Gun attack left Tennessee dead

So fucked up shit show machine
Probably gay faggot obscene
Orange Prolapse sound is the one I dread
Nashville’s more red with Tennessee dead

Tennessee, Tennessee
Second Amendment keeps us free
Correct, politically
Smackdown Tennessee

Tennessee, Tennessee
Second Amendment keeps us free
Correct, politically
Smackdown Tennessee

 

Tennessee Jed
Grateful Dead

Cold iron shackles, ball and chain
Listen to the whistle of the evening train
You know you bound to wind up dead
If you don't head back to Tennessee, Jed

Rich man step on my poor head
When you get up, you better butter my bread
Well, you know it's like I said
You better head back to Tennessee, Jed

Tennessee, Tennessee
There ain't no place I'd rather be
Baby, won't you carry me?
Back to Tennessee

Drink all day and rock all night
Law come to get you if you don't walk right
Got a letter this morning and it, all it read:
"You better head back to Tennessee, Jed"

I dropped four flights and cracked my spine
Honey, come quick with the iodine
Catch a few winks down under the bed
Then head back to Tennessee, Jed

Tennessee, Tennessee
There ain't no place I'd rather be
Baby, won't you carry me?
Back to Tennessee

I run into Charlie Phogg
He blacked my eye and he kicked my dog
My dog, he turned to me and he said:
"Let's head back to Tennessee, Jed"

I woke up a-feeling mean
Went down to play the slot machine
The wheels turned 'round and the letters read:
"Better head back to Tennessee, Jed"

Tennessee, Tennessee
There ain't no place I'd rather be
Baby, won't you carry me?
Back to Tennessee

Tennessee, Tennessee
There ain't no place I'd rather be
Baby, won't you carry me?
Back to Tennessee



This Dead classic makes for a great cover tune.  Straight forward melody.  The more Jerry messed up the lyrics, the better it sounded.

My third parody of Tennessee Jed.  In 2021, I penned #323.  Tennessee Fred (about former Senator Fred Thompson).  And last year I wrote #1014.  Tennessee Lee (about Bill Lee, the unrinary Governor of the voluntary state).

Two new venues on our Dead & Company excursion this summer... so far.  Walnut Creek Pavilion in Raleigh and the Jiffy Lube Amphitheater in Bristow, Virginia.  Both venues are currently sold out.  Not overly concerned on behalf of our ticketless asses. 


Grateful Dead:

04-08-89, Riverfront Coliseum, Cincinnati, OH
10-22-89, Charlotte Coliseum, Charlotte, NC
07-08-90, Three Rivers Stadium, Pittsburgh, PA
09-07-90, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
09-08-90, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
03-18-91, Capital Centre, Landover, MD
03-20-91, Capital Centre, Landover, MD
03-21-91, Capital Centre, Landover, MD
06-09-91, Buckeye Lake Music Center, Hebron, OH
06-14-91, RFK Stadium, Washington, D.C.
06-21-91, Soldier Field, Chicago, IL
06-24-91, Sandstone Amphitheatre, Bonner Springs, KS
09-04-91, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
09-05-91, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
09-06-91, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
06-06-92, Rich Stadium, Orchard Park, NY
06-08-92, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
06-09-92, Richifeld Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
06-11-92, Knickerbocker Arena, Albany, NY
06-12-92, Knickerbocker Arena, Albany, NY
06-14-92, Giants Stadium, East Rutherford, NJ
06-15-92, Giants Stadium, East Rutherford, NJ
06-17-92, Charlotte Coliseum, Charlotte, NC
06-18-92, Charlotte Coliseum, Charlotte, NC
06-20-92, RFK Stadium, Washington, D.C.
06-22-92, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
06-23-92, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
06-25-92, Soldier Field, Chicago, IL
06-26-92, Soldier Field, Chicago, IL
07-01-92, Buckeye Lake Music Center, Hebron, OH
03-14-93, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
03-17-93, Capital Centre, Landover, MD
03-18-93, Capital Centre, Landover, MD
06-11-93, Buckeye Lake Music Center, Hebron, OH
06-18-93, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
06-21-93, Deer Creek Music Center, Noblesville, IN
06-22-93, Deer Creek Music Center, Noblesville, IN
09-09-93, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
09-10-93, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
03-20-94, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
03-21-94, Richfield Coliseum, Cleveland, OH
07-29-94, Buckeye Lake Music Center, Hebron, OH
03-17-95, The Spectrum, Philadelphia, PA
06-30-95, Three Rivers Stadium, Pittsburgh, PA
07-02-95, Deer Creek Music Center, Noblesville, IN

Bob Weir / Dead & Company
 
Bob Weir, 7-19-91, I.C. Light Amphitheatre, Pittsburgh, PA
Bob Weir, 8-31-92, I.C. Light Amphitheatre, Pittsburgh, PA
Ratdog & Phil Lesh, 7-18-01, Polaris Amphitheater, Columbus, OH
Ratdog & Rusted Root, 8-12-01, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
The Other Ones, 11-29-02, Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
The Dead, Bob Dylan, 8-6-03, Germain Amphitheater, Columbus, OH
Dead & Company, 11-13-15, Nationwide Arena, Columbus, OH
Dead & Company, 8-13-16, First Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
Dead & Company, 6-15-17, KeyBank Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
Dead & Company, 6-28-17, Blossom Music Center, Cuyahoga Falls, OH
Dead & Company, 6-20-18, Blossom Music Center, Cuyahoga Falls, OH
Dead & Company, 7-5-19, Folsom Field, Boulder, CO
Dead & Company, 7-6-19, Folsom Field, Boulder, CO
Dead & Company, 8-28-21, Hershey Stadium, Hershey, PA
Dead & Company, 9-7-21, Blossom Music Center, Cuyahoga Falls, OH
Dead & Company, 7-12-22, The Pavilion at Star Lake, Burgettstown, PA


The Big Lie 100: (#941)

#1740.  CPAC (Stand Back --- Stevie Nicks)

#1741.  CPAC's Frightnin' (Smokestack Lightnin' --- Grateful Dead)

#1742.  Hatin' Nate Schatzline (Lay It On the Line --- Triumph)

#1743.  Nate Schatzline (Hold The Line --- Toto)

#1744.*  Faking The Violence (Breaking The Silence --- Queensryche)

#1745.  Treason He's A Cunt (Seasons In The Sun --- Terry Jacks)

#1746.  Tucker (Fucker --- Brian Jonestown Massacre)

#1747.  Lake's My Enemy (Cake And Sodomy --- Marilyn Manson)

#1748.  Newt (Cute --- Bobby Darrin)

#1749.  Donald Trump Is Gay (Take My Breath Away --- Berlin)

#1750.  Markwayne Mullin (Cocaine And Gin --- Kid Rock)

#1751.  Stormy's Better (Stormy Weather --- Billie Holiday)

#1752.  Stormy's Wetter (Stormy Weather --- The Pixies)

#1753.  Bell (Hell --- Foo Fighters)

#1754.  Will Will Slap You (We Will Rock You --- Queen)

#1755.  Donald Trump's a Cunt (On The Wings Of Love --- Jeffrey Osbourne)

#1756.  Donald Is A Child (Bad Boys Running Wild --- Scorpions)

#1757.  Donald's A Child (Running Wild --- Judas Priest)

#1758.  McConnell (Raising Hell --- Tom Morello & Ben Harper)

#1759.  ... Jim Justice Asshole (... And Justice For All --- Metallica) 

#1760.  Mike Pence Is Shit (Don't Fence Me In --- Willie Nelson)

#1761.  Blum (Dumb --- Nirvana)

#1762.  Charlie Kirk Sold Out (We Can Work It Out --- The Beatles)

#1763.  Xi Fucks You (She Loves You --- The Beatles)

#1764.  Has Been Chip Roy (Seek And Destroy --- Metallica)

#1765.  Steil (Smile -- Pearl Jam)

#1766.  Congressman Steil's Critical Race (God Put A Smile Upon Your Face --- Coldplay)

#1767.  Steil's A Liar (Trial By Fire --- Testament)

#1768.  Xi's Fucking Trump's Wife (She's Out Of My Life --- Michael Jackson)

#1769.  His Name Is Dave Williams (How I Made My Millions --- Radiohead)

#1770.  Xi Jinping's A Basket Case (Everything In Its Right Place --- Radiohead)

#1771.  Hovde Will Fuck You (Lovely To See You --- Moody Blues)

#1772.  Jim Justice (Seed Justice --- Neil Young)

#1773.  Steil (Smile --- Michael Jackson)

#1774.  Xi Jinping's Dead (Everything Zen --- Bush)

#1775.  Robinson (Machine Gun --- The Commodores)

#1776.  Donald's An Orange Prolapse Fart (Owner Of A Lonely Heart --- Yes)

#1777.  Nashville Isn't Lucky (Nashville to Kentucky --- My Morning Jacket)

#1778.  Tennessee Dead (Tennessee Jed --- Grateful Dead)

* - link unavailable.  Contact the internet for an appropriate explanation.


Please do not share this information with the victims of gun violence in Tennessee and/or former President Donald J. Trump.

 

 

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