#1347. Ivanka

I rarely write parodies about Cunt Dump.  That's my pet name for Ivanka.  

Hey, not much out there rhymes with "Ivanka Kushner."

Walk like an Egyptian?  If the Bangles were dead, they'd be turning over in their graves.

However, in the light of her mother Ivana Trump's unexpected passing at age 73, I thought I'd give it a shot.

It has been reported that she was found unresponsive at the bottom of a staircase in her apartment on the Upper East side of New York City. 

 

Ivanka
sonofsaf

Vanka has been committin' crimes, do me a favor
Swamp ass is wetter than his daughter who’s a fake Jew
All a show just sayin’ he’s a liar
Let’s kill some cops coup d’etat denier, Vanka!

Ivanka!  Trump we must defend!
Ivanka!  Trump's gonna wear Depends!
Ivanka!  Trump we must defend!
Ivanka

She makes me sick such a blunder Jew she’s fucking him
That Jared is a weenie and she’s suckin’ him
Gonna blow an orgasm if he fakes it
Butt then he’ll fuck with the Viagra bullshit, Donald

Ivanka!  Trump we must defend!
Ivanka!  Trump's gonna wear Depends!
Ivanka!  Trump we must defend!
Ivanka!  Stormy had some big ass tits.

Maybe, morning wood, she’ll suck it on the double
She will fuck you, in the ass with a strap-on too
There’s no excuse!  The Donald is your master
Trump’s cock says, “Blow!”  Daughter-wife is slurping faster, Vanka!

Ivanka! Trump we must defend!
Ivanka! Trump we must defend!
Ivanka! Vanka, Vanka, Vanka!
Ivanka! Trump we must defend!

Ivanka, Vanka, Vanka!
Ivanka!  He wants to fuck with the Viagra bullshit yeah!
Ivanka!
Ivanka!  Trump we must defend!

 

Ah Leah
Donnie Iris

Leah, it's been a long, long time, you're such a savior
You're lookin' better than a body has a right to
Don't you know we're playin' with the fire?
But we can stop this burnin' desire, Leah!

Ah! Leah! Here we go again!
Ah! Leah! Is it ever gonna end?
Ah! Leah! Here we go again!
Ah! Leah!

I see your lips and I wonder who's been kissin' them
I never knew how badly I was missin' them
We both know we're never going to make it
But when we touch, we never have to fake it, Leah!

Ah! Leah! Here we go again!
Ah! Leah! Is it ever gonna end?
Ah! Leah! Here we go again!
Ah! Leah! We ain't learned our lesson yet!

Baby, it's no good, we're just askin' for trouble
I can touch you, but I don't know how to love you
It ain't no use! We're headed for disaster
Our minds said, "No!" But our hearts were talkin' faster, Leah!

Ah! Leah! Here we go again!
Ah! Leah! Here we go again!
Ah! Leah! Leah, Leah, Leah!
Ah! Leah! Here we go again!

Ah! Leah, Leah, Leah!
Ah! Leah! We're never, ever, ever gonna make it yeah!
Ah! Leah!
Ah! Leah! Here we go again!

According to setlist.fm, from 1981 to 2022, Donnie Iris (real name Dominic Lerace of nearby Elwood City, PA) has played the Burgh a grand total of 29 times.  That number consists of major venues.  Although, I'm pretty sure his total number of gigs around the Pittsburgh region ranges somewhere in the realm of infinite.

Donnie Iris:

10-28-18, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA (Star Spangled Banner - Browns vs. Steelers)

I vaguely remember seeing him play at one of those Star Lake "regional round-up band bashes," but cannot say with absolute certainty.

The Big Lie 100: (#523)

#1301.  Wittman (Roxanne --- The Police)

#1302.  Doctor Oz Is Gay (Watch The Children Pray --- Metal Church)

#1303.  Abortion (Black Hole Sun --- Soundgarden)

#1304.  Abortion (Distortion --- Overkill)

#1305.  Alito's World (Torpedo Girl --- Kiss)

#1306.  Trump's My Enemy (Flesh For Fantasy --- Billy Idol)

#1307.  Kushner Is A Jew (Breaking Us In Two --- Joe Jackson)

#1308.  Wittman (Hitman --- Metal Church)

#1309.  Red Alito (Red Mosquito --- Pearl Jam)

#1310.  The Farts Of Thomas Cole (The Heart Of Rock and Roll --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#1311.  Even Joe Gruters (Even The Losers --- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)

#1312.  Joe Gruters Screw (Computer Blue --- Prince)

#1313.  Meadows (Meadows --- Joe Walsh)

#1314.  McCarthy's Got No Soul (You Can't Stop Rock'n'Roll --- Twisted Sister)

#1315.  Thomas Cole (Heart & Soul --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#1316.  Mark Meadows (Domino --- Van Morrison)

#1317.  Thomas Cole Has No Regrets (Rock'n'Roll Never Forgets --- Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band)

#1318.  Meadows Really Blows (Steady As She Goes --- The Raconteurs)

#1319.  Kristi Noem's, Cunt Explodes (Take Me Home, Country Roads --- John Denver)

#1320.  Kristina Blackout (The Sun Will Come Out --- Annie)

#1321.  The Trumpers (The Numbers --- Radiohead)

#1322.  Hern's A Bitch (Burn The Witch --- Queens Of The Stone Age)

#1323.  Noem's An Ass (Home At Last --- Steely Dan)

#1324.  Huckabee (Faithfully --- Journey)

#1325.  Herschel Walker (I'm A Rocker --- Judas Priest)

#1326.  Hern's The Fuck To Blame (Burning Like A Flame --- Dokken)

#1328.  Donald Trump's A Piece Of Shit (I'm A Little Rocket Ship --- Cracker)

#1329.  Kelley Rat (Smelly Cat --- Phoebe Buffay)

#1330.  He's Mark Green (I'm Eighteen --- Alice Cooper)

#1331.  Nunn Is So Gay (One Of These Days --- Pink Floyd)

#1332.  Nunn (One --- Three Dog Night)

#1333.  Donald Trump Is Fucking Gay (Living In The U.S.A. --- Steve Miller)

#1334.  Nunn (One --- Metallica)

#1335.  Cline (Time --- Alan Parsons Project)

#1336.  Hal Rogers, Fat Fuck (Like Father, Like Son --- Exodus)

#1337.  Huckabee (Suddenly --- Bee Gees)

#1338.  Face Mullin (Space Truckin' --- Deep Purple)

#1339.  He's Jim Pillen (You Be Illin' --- Run DMC)

#1340.  Steve Bannon (Rhiannon --- Fleetwood Mac)

#1341.  Janae Is A Shamp (Lady Is A Tramp --- Tony Bennett)

#1342.  Scott Perry Will Fuck You (The Very Thought Of You --- Rod Stewart)

#1343.  Scantlebury Suicide (Mandatory Suicide --- Slayer)

#1344.  Yost Is Toast (Coast to Coast --- Scorpions)

#1345.  Masters (Bastard --- Motley Crue)

#1346.  Mark Lamb (Burndt Jamb --- Weezer)

#1347.  Ivanka!  (Ah! Leah! --- Donnie Iris)

Please do not share this material with Ivanka Kushner and/or former President Donald J. Trump.