#2241. Swift

Time Magazine just named Taylor Swift their person of the year.

Swifties, which Tay Tay is your favorite?  I'm choosing the middle Tay which provides visual evidence of zero armpit hair.  Anathema to female Phish phans.

 

 

Swift
sonofsaf

A white pussy opens she’s a piece of shit
Butt never embarrassed her name’s Taylor Swift
I wish she would die with her billions bequeathed
Travis Kelce will fight and he plays for the Chiefs
She’s touring all season, stadiums alright
As Roger Goodell takes a piss on her tonight
Commish ain’t friendly a gang bang you say
As the NFL is in total disarray

Satan’s better I’ll see you in hell
A Tight End she blows but the merch he will sell
Capitol One enemy she will not pledge
Her credit’s increased as her bets she will hedge
Those costumes outrageous her sunglasses please
Guaranteed she lengthens his dick from her knees
Cashing in service fees with all of her might  
His cock ain’t dissuaded an anal invite

Satan’s better I’ll see you in hell
A Tight End she blows but the merch he will sell
Capitol One enemy she will not pledge
Her credit’s increased as her bets she will hedge

Those costumes outrageous her sunglasses please
Guaranteed she lengthens his dick from her knees

Cashing in service fees with all of her might  
(His cock ain’t dissuaded an anal invite) (x5)

 

Rift
Phish

Last night, in the moments my thoughts were adrift
And coasting a terrace, approaching a rift
Through which I could spy several glimpses beneath
Of the darkness the light from above could not reach
I spied wings of reason, herself taking flight
And upon yonder precipice saw her alight
And glared back at me one last look of dismay
As if she were the last one she thought I'd betray

So much better I said to myself
And drawing quite close to the top of the shelf
I struggled with destiny upon the ledge
And gasped when defeated he slipped off the edge
And silence contagious in moments like these
Consumed me and strengthened my will to appease
The passion that sparked me one terrible night
And shocked and persuaded my soul to ignite

So much better I said to myself
And drawing quite close to the top of the shelf
I struggled with destiny upon the ledge
And gasped when defeated he slipped off the edge

And silence contagious in moments like these
Consume me and strengthen my will to appease

The passion that sparked me one terrible night
(And shocked and persuaded my soul to ignite) (x5)

 

Always liked Rift.  Maze too.  Phish has a bunch of decent one word songs.  Free, Foam, Stash, etc.

From 1992 to the present, Phish has jammed the Burgh a grand total of 16 times.

Phish:

11-12-94, Kent State University, Kent, OH
6-20-95, Blossom Music Center, Cleveland, OH
11-24-95, Civic Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
8-12-96, Deer Creek Music Center, Noblesville, IN
10-18-96, Civic Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
8-13-97, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
12-5-97, CSU Convocation Center, Cleveland, OH
7-31-98, Polaris Amphitheater, Columbus, OH
11-13-98, CSU Convocation Center, Cleveland, OH
7-29-03, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-18-09, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-23-12, Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
7-19-17, Peterson Events Center, Pittsburgh, PA
6-19-19, Blossom Music Center, Cuyahoga Falls, OH
12-4-19, Peterson Events Center, Pittsburgh, PA
8-2-22, Blossom Music Center, Cuyahoga Falls, OH
7-21-23, The Pavilion at Star Lake, Burgettstown, PA

Trey Anastasio:

2-25-11, Stage AE, Pittsburgh, PA
9-29-21, Stage AE, Pittsburgh, PA

As stated earlier, I've decided to include all future parodies about billionaires in the Big Lie 100.

Taylor Swift:  If by chance, you ever read my parody...  Since you're a celebrity and economic powerhouse in the quest for global domination, I have a revolutionary idea for you that transcends music and stardom.  Hit me up.

The Big Lie 100: (#1380)

#2216.  For Trump (Her Strut --- Bob Seger)

#2217.  Mark Green (Green Beans --- Animal Collective)

#2218.  Song For The Trumped (Song For The Dumped --- Ben Folds Five)

#2219.  Trumped (Chumped --- Joyce Manor)

#2220.  Lahmeyer (Desire --- U2)

#2221.  Trumper (Kiss --- Strutter)

#2222.  Prolapse Stain: Forty-Five (Morning Train: Nine To Five --- Sheena Easton)

#2223.  Strong (Wrong --- Lindsey Buckingham)

#2224.  Gilberry (Hail Mary --- Alice Cooper)

#2225.  Perry's Pissed (Cherry Twist --- Crystal Method)

#2226.  Go Musk Yourself (Go Fuck Yourself --- Two Feet)

#2227.  Perry (Cherry - U.F.O.)

#2228.  Strong Is A Clown (Wrong Side Of Town)

#2229.  Trumpy Little Bitch And Cunt (Crazy Little Thing Called Love --- Queen)

#2230.  Gilberry (Hail Mary --- Testament)

#2231.  Christian Ziegler (Sister Christian --- Night Ranger)

#2232.  Forty-Five (9 to 5 --- Dolly Parton)

#2233.  Tesla Sucks (Thunderstruck --- AC/DC)

#2234.  5K (Birthday --- Paul McCartney)

#2235.  Florida State Got Fuckin' Screwed (Overweight But Over You)

#2236.  Kennedy (Ecstasy --- PJ Harvey)

#2237.  Mr. Kevin Cramer (Mr. Entertainer --- Men At Work)

#2238.  Kennedy (Faithfully --- Journey)

#2239.  Strong (Wrong --- Waylon Jennings)

#2240.  DeNiro (My Hero --- Foo Fighters)

#2241.  Swift (Rift --- Phish)

Please do not share this material with Taylor Swift and/or former President Donald J. Trump.