Monday, October 03, 2022

#1477. Kim Jong's Illin'

Imagine a world in which Lil Kim and the Orange Prolapse exchange love letters and have access to nuclear weapons.  Uh, well, that actually happened.  It wasn't a hypothetical.  It was real-world.



So what might happen if Trump somehow gets reelected... but they "fall out of love?"



 

Kim Jong’s Illin’
sonofsaf

Dictator North Korean and Trump was really smitten
Enrichin’ with fission, nuclear weapons are a kickin’
Land of famine starvin’ chinks ain’t got no money
Trump’s wife is a cunt disposition ain’t sunny
He’s the one we hate, cannot be denied
Donald Trump’s a baby, “Total scum…needs to be pacified”
Trump baby said “Yeah”, diaper full of shit payback
The fuckin’ Mexican deporter, big lies, attack
Kim Jong’s illin’

[Verse 2]

(A) dick he wants to lick it fellatio hey!
Big Mac Meat (you say) okay
His tiny small hands, ’n little feet
Trump let out a fart, shit lickin’ colon is the meat
The Donald’s fucked up, forty-five clown
Butthole crack, filled with poop, syndrome of a down
Kim Jong’s Illin

[Verse 3]

Now the Republicans all pray to an Orange Prolapse who’s farty
They’re all cock blockin’ fucks except for porn star Stormy D.
In a monster-titted world she said “Yo, you, better drop your pants.”
Trumps’ ass was death with not so much romancin’ but he had his chance
Kim Jong’s Illin’

[Verse 4]

(Not) thinner, full of shit, Trump’s soul’s bereft
Oh so faulty, no stutter, Liz Cheney’s the ref
Trump’s neither healthy nor fit he’s just one strange weird dude
Trump never will concede ‘cause the Orange Prolapse is rude
Kim Jong’s Illin’

 

You Be Illin’
Run DMC

(One) day when I was chillin' in Kentucky Fried Chicken
Just mindin' my business, eatin' food and finger lickin'
This dude walked in lookin' strange and kind of funny
Went up to the front with a menu and his money
He didn't walk straight, kind of side to side
He asked this old lady, "Yo, yo, um...is this Kentucky Fried?"
The lady said "Yeah", smiled and he smiled back
He gave a quarter and his order, small fries, Big Mac!
You be illin'

[Verse 2]

(To)day you won a ticket to see Doctor J
Front row seat (in free!) no pay
Radio in hand, snacks by feet
Game's about to start, you kickin' popcorn to the beat
You finally wake up, Doc's gone to town
Round his back, through the hoop, then you scream "Touchdown!"
You be illin'

[Verse 3]

The other day around the way I seen you illin' at a party
Drunk as skunk you illin' punk and in your left hand was Bacardi
You went up to this fly girl and said "Yo, yo, can I get this dance?"
She smelt your breath and then she left you standin' in your illin'
stance
You be illin'

[Verse 4]

(For) dinner, you ate it, there is none left
It was salty, with butter and it was def
You proceeded to eat it cos you was in the mood
But holmes you did not read it was a can of dog food!
You be illin'



Believe it or not, this is my second parody of "You Be Illin'."  A few months ago I wrote "He's Jim Pillen" (the Republican candidate for Governor of Nebraska).  So which one's better?  I think the Kim Jong Un one packs a little more punch.  Feel free to judge for yourself.

Run DMC has played the Burgh a grand total of 6 times.  Never seen the iconic rap band. 


The Big Lie 100: (#652)

#1417.  Crudite Mode (Holiday Road --- Lindsey Buckingham)

#1418.  Wants Crudite (So Far Away --- Dire Straits)

#1419.  The Crudite (Not Fade Away --- Grateful Dead)

#1420.  Crudite Din (Holiday Inn --- Elton John)
 
#1421.  Tiffany Smiley (Baba O'Riley --- Grateful Dead)

#1422.  Markwayne (Cocaine --- Eric Clapton)
 
#1423.  Coco Elaine (Hello Again --- The Cars)
 
#1424.  Ill Campaigns (Still Remains --- Stone Temple Pilots)
 
#1425.  Crudite (Yesterday --- Paul McCartney)
 
#1426.  Roe Roe Roe Your Vote (Row Row Row Your Vote --- Ella Fitzgerald)
 
#1427.  Tate Reeves (Governor Blows) --- (Believe (Nobody Knows) --- My Morning Jacket)
 
#1428.  Eatin' Crudite (Surfin' U.S.A. --- Beach Boys)
 
#1429.  Mrs. Smiley (Mr. Smiley --- Poison)
 
#1430.  Mitch McConnell (Old MacDonald --- Unknown)
 
#1431.  Master Is Special (Master Of Puppets --- Metallica) 

#1432.  Crudite (Holiday --- Bee Gees)
 
#1433.  Fucked Up Ass Blake Masters (Fabulous Disaster --- Exodus)
 
#1434.  Mrs. Smiley (Mr. Crowley --- Ozzy Osbourne)
 
#1435.  Talk To Mark Meadows (Walk In The Shadows --- Queensryche)
 
#1436. Chris Kice (The Price -- Twisted Sister)

#1437.  Crudite (Stay Away --- Nirvana)

#1438.  Crudite (New Year's Day --- U2)

#1439.  One More Crudite Bite (One More Saturday Night --- Grateful Dead)

#1440.  The Crudite's Bad (The Crudite) Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away) --- Motley Crue))

#1441.  Crudite (Say Say Say --- Paul McCartney & Michael Jackson)

#1442.  That Donald Trump Is... (All In The Name Of... Motley Crue)

#1443.  Comer Isn't Very Smart (Owner Of A Lonely Heart --- Yes)

#1444.  Mehmet Oz (Just Because --- Jane's Addiction)

#1445.  A Piece Of Shit From The Start (Total Eclipse Of The Heart --- Bonnie Tyler)

#1446.  J.D. (Lady --- Styx)

#1447.  J.D. Vance (My Romance --- Carly Simon)

#1448.  Donald Trump's Hair (Ya Mo B There --- Michael McDonald)

#1449.  Dixon, Tudor (Touch My Tooter --- Ween)

#1450.  J.D. (Lady --- Little River Band)

#1451.  J.D. Is Gay (Lay Lady Lay --- Bob Dylan)

#1452.  Tudor Dixon (Superstition --- Stevie Wonder)

#1453.  Richard Woods (Harry Hood --- Phish)

#1454.  Woods (Would --- Alice In Chains)

#1455.  Ted Budd (Blackbird --- The Beatles)

#1456.  Budd Is Far Right (Bloody Well Right --- Supertramp)

#1457.  Trump's Strange (La Grange --- ZZ Top)

#1458.  Ashley Kalus (Brokedown Palace --- Grateful Dead)

#1459.  Hung Cao (Right Now --- Van Halen)

#1460.  Hung Cao (Black Cow --- Steely Dan)

#1461.  Scott Jensen (Confusion --- Electric Light Orchestra)

#1462.  Meet Mehmet (Meet The Mets --- Ruth Roberts & Bill Katz)

#1463.  Bolduc (Holed Up --- The Raconteurs)

#1464.  Bolduc's Fucked up (Hold Your Head Up --- Argent)

#1465.  Vance Is A Cunt (Eminence Front --- The Who)

#1466.  Oh Mike Lindell (The First Noel --- Brian Wilson)

#1467.  A Fucking Assclown (The Final Countdown --- Europe)

#1468.  Kim Jong Un Will Fight (Afternoon Delight --- Starland Vocal Band)

#1469.  Majewski's Outta Line (Nobody's Fault But Mine --- Led Zeppelin)

#1470.  I Guess That's Why They Call Him A Jew (I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues --- Elton John)

#1471.  Crudite Plate (Runaway Train --- Soul Asylum)

#1472.  Roger Stone (Danger Zone --- Kenny Loggins)

#1473.  Roger Stone (Danger Zone --- The Ramones)

#1474.  Laxalt (Asshole --- Tom Petty)

#1475.  Trump Is A Bitch (Under The Bridge --- Red Hot Chili Peppers)

#1476.  Mark Meadows Loves Gay Porn (Every Rose Has A Thorn --- Poison)

#1477.  Kim Jong's Illin' (You Be Illin' --- Run DMC


Please do not share this material with Kim Jong Un and/or former President Donald J. Trump.


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