I haven't done an SAT-styled political analogy in quite some time. So here goes.
Crudite : Veggie Tray
Charcuterie Board : Lunchables.
 |
| = New Jersey, Manhattan, West Palm Beach carpetbagger extraordinaire |
 |
| = the guy who won. |
Gotta be totally honest here. Strictly along the lines of produce, if given the option... I think I'd choose the more elaborate crudite.
Buy The Crudite
sonofsaf
At a Wegner’s
Prices are shitty. Avocado guackin’ disease
Still at Wegner’s salsa I presume
The cost of fuckin’ broccoli
Ooh, maybe, maybe.
Inflation is here to stay
Ooh, maybe, maybe.
Get cash from your pants
You think you’re tough so buy the crudite
Oh, c’mon maybe, buy the crudite.
The price higher.
Seven deadly sinner, has a mushroom dick to show.
A fat liar, romancing he’s a buyer and Lake Tahoe really blows.
Ooh, maybe, maybe.
Inflation is here to stay.
Ooh, maybe, maybe.
Well, Trump drop your pants, ‘cause you think you’re tough so buy the crudite
Oh, c’mon maybe, buy the crudite.
Buy the crudite.
Buy, buy, buy the crudite.
[Repeat and fade]
Dance The Night Away
Van Halen
Have you seen her?
So fine and pretty. Fooled me with her style and ease.
And I feel her from across the room.
Yes, it's love in the third degree.
Ooh, baby, baby.
Won'tcha turn your head my way?
Ooh, baby, baby.
Come on, take a chance.
You're old enough to dance the night away.
Oh, come on, baby, dance the night away.
A live wire.
Barely a beginner, but just watch that lady go.
She's on fire, 'cause dancing gets her higher than anything else she knows.
Ooh, baby, baby.
Won'tcha turn your head my way?
Ooh, baby, baby.
Well, don't skip romance, 'cause you're old enough to dance the night away.
Oh, come on, baby, dance the night away.
Dance the night away.
Dance, dance, dance the night away.
[Repeat and fade]
Top 5 favorite Van Halen songs in order? I'd have to think about it. But just off the top of my head.
5. And the Cradle Will Rock (maybe)
4. Best of Both Worlds
3. Panama
2. Unchained
1. Hot For Teacher
From 1972 > 2015, Van Halen played the Burgh a grand total of 19 times.
Van Halen:
6-15-88, Three Rivers Stadium, Pitttsburgh, PA (Monsters of Rock)
6-23-88, Rubber Bowl, Akron, OH (Monsters of Rock)
6-29-04, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
3-21-08, Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
3-30-12, Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, PA)
7-28-15, First Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
The Crudite Compilation Top 10:
#1407. Crudite Night Is So Delighting (Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting --- Elton John)
#1408. Crudite (Holiday --- Madonna)
#1409. Crudite (Holiday --- Scorpions)
#1410. Crudite (Day By Day --- The Hooters)
#1411. Let's Get Crudite (Let's Go All The Way --- Sly Fox)
#1412. Crudite (Fly Away --- Lenny Kravitz)
#1417. Crudite Mode (Holiday Road --- Lindsey Buckingham)
#1418. Wants Crudite (So Far Away --- Dire Straits)
#1419. The Crudite (Not Fade Away --- Grateful Dead)
#1425. Crudite (Yesterday --- Paul McCartney)
#1428. Eatin' Crudite (Beach Boys --- Surfin' U.S.A.)
#1432. Crudite (Holiday --- Bee Gees)
#1437. Crudite (Stay Away --- Nirvana)
#1438. Crudite (New Year's Day --- U2)
#1439. One More Crudite Bite (One More Saturday Night --- Grateful Dead)
#1440. The Crudite's Bad (The Crudite)
#1441. Crudite (Say Say Say --- Paul McCartney & Michael Jackson)
#1471. Crudite Plate (Runaway Train --- Soul Asylum)
#1522. Mehmet's A Crudite Fan (We're An American Band --- Rob Zombie)
#1552. Yum Crudite (Slade --- Run Runaway)
#1553. Buy The Crudite (Dance The Night Away --- Van Halen)
The Big Lie 100: (#728)
#1417. Crudite Mode (Holiday Road --- Lindsey Buckingham)
#1418. Wants Crudite (So Far Away --- Dire Straits)
#1419. The Crudite (Not Fade Away --- Grateful Dead)
#1432. Crudite (Holiday --- Bee Gees)
#1437. Crudite (Stay Away --- Nirvana)
#1438. Crudite (New Year's Day --- U2)
#1439. One More Crudite Bite (One More Saturday Night --- Grateful Dead)
#1440. The Crudite's Bad (The Crudite) (Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away) --- Motley Crue)
#1441. Crudite (Say Say Say --- Paul McCartney & Michael Jackson)
#1442. That Donald Trump Is... (All In The Name Of... Motley Crue)
#1443. Comer Isn't Very Smart (Owner Of A Lonely Heart --- Yes)
#1444. Mehmet Oz (Just Because --- Jane's Addiction)
#1445. A Piece Of Shit From The Start (Total Eclipse Of The Heart --- Bonnie Tyler)
#1446. J.D. (Lady --- Styx)
#1447. J.D. Vance (My Romance --- Carly Simon)
#1448. Donald Trump's Hair (Ya Mo B There --- Michael McDonald)
#1449. Dixon, Tudor (Touch My Tooter --- Ween)
#1450. J.D. (Lady --- Little River Band)
#1451. J.D. Is Gay (Lay Lady Lay --- Bob Dylan)
#1452. Tudor Dixon (Superstition --- Stevie Wonder)
#1453. Richard Woods (Harry Hood --- Phish)
#1454. Woods (Would --- Alice In Chains)
#1455. Ted Budd (Blackbird --- The Beatles)
#1456. Budd Is Far Right (Bloody Well Right --- Supertramp)
#1457. Trump's Strange (La Grange --- ZZ Top)
#1458. Ashley Kalus (Brokedown Palace --- Grateful Dead)
#1459. Hung Cao (Right Now --- Van Halen)
#1460. Hung Cao (Black Cow --- Steely Dan)
#1461. Scott Jensen (Confusion --- Electric Light Orchestra)
#1462. Meet Mehmet (Meet The Mets --- Ruth Roberts & Bill Katz)
#1463. Bolduc (Holed Up --- The Raconteurs)
#1464. Bolduc's Fucked up (Hold Your Head Up --- Argent)
#1465. Vance Is A Cunt (Eminence Front --- The Who)
#1466. Oh Mike Lindell (The First Noel --- Brian Wilson)
#1467. A Fucking Assclown (The Final Countdown --- Europe)
#1468. Kim Jong Un Will Fight (Afternoon Delight --- Starland Vocal Band)
#1469. Majewski's Outta Line (Nobody's Fault But Mine --- Led Zeppelin)
#1470. I Guess That's Why They Call Him A Jew (I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues --- Elton John)
#1471. Crudite Plate (Runaway Train --- Soul Asylum)
#1472. Roger Stone (Danger Zone --- Kenny Loggins)
#1473. Roger Stone (Danger Zone --- The Ramones)
#1474. Laxalt (Asshole --- Tom Petty)
#1475. Trump Is A Bitch (Under The Bridge --- Red Hot Chili Peppers)
#1476. Mark Meadows Loves Gay Porn (Every Rose Has A Thorn --- Poison)
#1477. Kim Jong's Illin' (You Be Illin' --- Run DMC)
#1478. Bad Roger Stone (Bad To The Bone --- George Thorogood & The Destroyers)
#1479. Burt (Hurt --- Nine Inch Nails)
#1480. Pate Is A Geek (Eight Days A Week --- The Beatles)
#1481. Poor Sandy Smith (Poor Ellen Smith --- Billy Strings)
#1482. Laxalt (Blackout --- Scorpions)
#1483. Steve J. Scalise (Karma Police --- Radiohead)
#1484. Steve Scalise (Dream Police --- Cheap Trick)
#1485. Teddy Cruz (Boggie Shoes --- KC & The Sunshine Band)
#1486. Ronchetti (Black Betty --- Metal Church)
#1487. Joe O'Dea (Day By Day --- The Hooters)
#1488. Tommy Tuberville (A View To A Kill --- Duran Duran)
#1489. Fuck You Trumpers (All You Zombies --- The Hooters)
#1490. A. Biggs (War Pigs --- Black Sabbath)
#1491. Rubio Ga Ga (Radio Ga Ga --- Queen)
#1492. Moran (Old Man --- Neil Young)
#1493. Trump's A Liar (Ring Of Fire --- Johnny Cash)
#1494. Why Does Ivanka Blow (Where Do The Children Go --- The Hooters)
#1495. Why Why, Gay Gay (Chris Sununu) (My My, Hey Hey (Out Of The Blue) --- Neil Young)
#1496. Tonight Ivanka Masturbates For You (Tonight I Want To Celebrate With You --- My Morning Jacket)
#1497. Marco A. Rubio (Turn Up The Radio --- Autograph)
#1498. Tshibaka (Fuck You) (Axilla (Part II --- Phish)
#1499. Sinning (Winning --- Santana)
#1500. Nunes (Jane Says --- Jane's Addiction)
#1501. (We Don't Want No) Kenneth Paxton (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction --- Rolling Stones)
#1502. Asshole In Trump Tower... Stinking (Standing In The Shower... Thinking --- Jane's Addiction)
#1503. Fuck Cooper (The Trooper --- Iron Maiden)
#1504. Ganahl (Crank Call --- Billy Idol)
#1505. Bannon (Love Gun --- Kiss)
#1506. Marco Rubio's A Clown And A Retard (Me And Julio Down By The Schoolyard --- Paul Simon)
#1507. Paul LePage (Turn The Page --- Bob Seger)
#1508. The Donald Is Orange Not White (We Only Come Out At Night --- Smashing Pumpkins)
#1509. Cindy Kirk (Dirty Work --- Steely Dan)
#1510. Strong And His Mouth (Song Of The South --- Alabama)
#1511. Clarence Thomas (Mr. Crowley --- Ozzy Osbourne)
#1512. Jim Marchant (Ants Marching --- Dave Matthews Band)
#1513. Adam Hinojosa (Champagne Supernova --- Oasis)
#1514. Acrisure (Immature --- Bjork)
#1515. Michels The Liar (Trial By Fire --- Testament)
#1516. Donald's A Liar (Great Balls Of Fire --- Jerry Lee Lewis)
#1517. Mark Amodei (Carry that Weight --- Paul McCartney)
#1518. George Logan (War Begun --- My Morning Jacket)
#1519. Mike DeWine (He's So Fine --- The Chiffons)
#1520. Connie Scott (Ocelot --- Phish)
#1521. Colonel Robertson (Mrs. Robisnon --- Paul Simon)
#1522. Mehmet's A Crudite Fan (We're An American Band --- Rob Zombie)
#1523. The Liar Bob Burns (The Fire That Burns --- Twisted Sister)
#1524. Grassley Ass Ass (Blow, Blow, Blow) (Grassy Grass Grass (Grow, Grow, Grow --- Woody Guthrie)
#1525. Fuck Cory Mills (Run To The Hills --- Iron Maiden)
#1526. Sununu (Katmandu --- Bob Seger)
#1527. Josh Brecheen (Hey Nineteen --- Steely Dan)
#1528. Lombardo (Touch And Go --- The Cars)
#1529. Gerald Malloy (Seek And Destroy --- Metallica)
#1530. Ezell (That Smell --- Lynyrd Skynyrd)
#1531. Die Anus Brenna Bird (Fly Famous Mockingbird --- Phish)
#1532. I Hope He Dies (DeSantis DeSantis) (As Time Goes By (A Kiss Is Just A Kiss) --- Herman Hupfeld)
#1533. Sam Peters (Maneater --- Hall & Oates)
#1534. Houchin Is A Buffoon (Bouncin' Around The Room --- Phish)
#1535. Brenna Bird (Mockingbird --- Carly Simon)
#1536. Eli Crane (On A Plain --- Nirvana)
#1537. Marco Rubio (Sussudio --- Phil Collins)
#1538. Dislike Neil Parrott (Smells Like Teen Spirit --- Nirvana)
#1539. Kirkmeyer (Desire --- U2)
#1540. Bruce Poliquin (Bad Medicine --- Bon Jovi)
#1541. Chavez DeRemer (Daydream Believer --- The Monkees)
#1542. Michelle Steel (Spinning Wheel --- Blood, Sweat & Tears)
#1543. Ganahl's Gay (Dance Hall Days --- Wang Chung)
#1544. Trump (Jump --- Van Halen)
#1545. Justin Amash (Caught In A Mosh --- Anthrax)
#1546. Senator Chuck Grassley (Tallahassee Lassie --- Rolling Stones)
#1547. Omnibus (Magic Bus --- The Who)
#1548. Bird Whore (3rd Floor --- Death Angel)
#1549. Fuck Ganahl (Give It All --- Ratt)
#1550. Heidi Ganahl (I Want It All --- Queen)
#1551. Aaron Bean (Vasoline --- Stone Temple Pilots)
#1552. Yum Crudite (Run Runaway --- Slade)
#1553. Buy The Crudite (Dance The Night Away --- Van Halen)
Please do not share this material with Mehmet Oz and/or former President Donald J. Trump.
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