#2512. Shohei Ohtani

The last episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm aired over the weekend.  I thought it was exceptionally strong.

People have often said that I remind them of Seinfeld creator Larry David.

To which I reply verbatim, "Now that... is a comparison to which no mere mortal could be conceived."  And therefore, it must be true.  An ontological argument I suppose.  Immanuel Cunt!

I swear to D-g.  This is NOT a modified hot dog.

Dedicated to Shohei Ohtani's agent.

Ippei Mizuhara!

 

Shohei Ohtani
sonofsaf

Mulligatawny
Seinfeld

That is how every sportscaster should pronounce Ohtani's full name.  With that same exasperated tone of fragmented frustration and shocked disbelief.  Back in the late 90's, I made a batch of Mulligatawny.  Turned out pretty good.

Possibly the funniest Seinfeld closer scene.  I also like this blooper sequence from when Frank Costanza went to bail George out of jail.  

Seinfeld?  Seen 'em all.

The Big Lie 100: (#1647)

#2216.  For Trump (Her Strut --- Bob Seger)

#2217.  Mark Green (Green Beans --- Animal Collective)

#2218.  Song For The Trumped (Song For The Dumped --- Ben Folds Five)

#2219.  Trumped (Chumped --- Joyce Manor)

#2220.  Lahmeyer (Desire --- U2)

#2221.  Trumper (Kiss --- Strutter)

#2222.  Prolapse Stain: Forty-Five (Morning Train: Nine To Five --- Sheena Easton)

#2223.  Strong (Wrong --- Lindsey Buckingham)

#2224.  Gilberry (Hail Mary --- Alice Cooper)

#2225.  Perry's Pissed (Cherry Twist --- Crystal Method)

#2226.  Go Musk Yourself (Go Fuck Yourself --- Two Feet)

#2227.  Perry (Cherry - U.F.O.)

#2228.  Strong Is A Clown (Wrong Side Of Town)

#2229.  Trumpy Little Bitch And Cunt (Crazy Little Thing Called Love --- Queen)

#2230.  Gilberry (Hail Mary --- Testament)

#2231.  Christian Ziegler (Sister Christian --- Night Ranger)

#2232.  Forty-Five (9 to 5 --- Dolly Parton)

#2233.  Tesla Sucks (Thunderstruck --- AC/DC)

#2234.  5K (Birthday --- Paul McCartney)

#2235.  Florida State Got Fuckin' Screwed (Overweight But Over You --- The Vaselines)

#2236.  Kennedy (Ecstasy --- PJ Harvey)

#2237.  Mr. Kevin Cramer (Mr. Entertainer --- Men At Work)

#2238.  Kennedy (Faithfully --- Journey)

#2239.  Strong (Wrong --- Waylon Jennings)

#2240.  DeNiro (My Hero --- Foo Fighters)

#2241.  Swift (Rift --- Phish)

#2242.  Tay Tay Tay (Say Say Say --- Michael Jackson & Paul McCartney)

#2243.  Travis (Krampus --- Houndmouth)

#2244.  Strong's Gay (Wrong Way --- Creed)

#2245.  Hostetter (Shoplifter --- Green Day)

#2246.  Donald Trump Is An Orange Clown (London Bridge Is Falling Down --- Cocomelon)

#2247.  Donald Trump Is A Retard (Twinkle Twinkle Little Star --- Olivia Newton-John)

#2248.  Bland Is A Cunt (Band On The Run --- Paul McCartney)

#2249.  Kennedy (Destiny --- Journey)

#2250.  Dictator (Heartbreaker --- Pat Benatar)

#2251.  Kenneth Paxton (Love Boat Captain --- Pearl Jam)

#2252.  The Digital Mugshot Edition (To Defy The Laws Of Tradition --- Primus)

#2253.  Trump Tower (Sunflower --- Neil Diamond)

#2254.  Kid Rock Will Dine (I Walk The Line --- Johnny Cash)

#2255.  Playin' The Browns (Send In The Clowns --- Barbara Streisand)

#2256.  Foxmania (Albania --- Nicholas Colasanto / Cheers Episode)

#2257.  Guy Reschenthaler (Dollar For Dollar --- They Might Be Giants)

#2258.  Reschenthaler (Dollar, Dollar --- PJ Harvey)

#2259.  Kid's Cock (We Rock --- Dio)

#2260.  Reschenthaler (Greenback Dollar --- Woody Guthrie)

#2261.  It's Hunter's Laptop From Hell (I Think I'm Going To Hell --- My Morning Jacket)

#2262.  Laptop Hell (Silver Bells --- Dean Martin)

#2263.  Good!  (Would? --- Alice In Chains)

#2264.  The Tower Of Trump (The Power Of Love --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#2265.  Good Times (Good Times --- Jim Gilstrap, Blinky Williams and a gospel choir)

#2266.  Laptop From Hell (Highway To Hell --- AC/DC)

#2267.  Colby Covington (You Are Number One --- The Whispers)

#2268.  If Bob Good (If I Could --- Phish)

#2269.  Moreno (Tornado --- Garbage)

#2270.  Cum Coney Barrett (Come Holy Spirit --- Planetshakers)

#2271.  Coney Barrett Cum (Holy Spirit Come --- Hillsong UNITED)

#2272.  Coney Barrett Cum (Holy Spirit Come --- Rita Springer)

#2273.  Coney Barrett (Holy Spirit --- Travis Cottrell)

#2274.  Coney Barrett (Holy Spirit --- Neville Brothers)

#2275.  Kushner's Wife Is A Fucking Jew (All I Want For Christmas Is You --- Mariah Carey)

#2276.  Colorado (Desperado --- The Eagles)

#2277.  Detroit Pistons (Sister Christian --- Night Ranger)

#2278.  Isn't Very White (Couldn't Get It Right --- Climax Blues Band)

#2279.  Rudolph, the Yinzer Steeler (Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer)

#2280.  Big Mac Meat (Shakedown Street --- Grateful Dead)

#2281.  Strong's Gay (Wrong Way --- Sublime)

#2282.  Coney Barrett Cum (Holy Spirit Come --- Nathaniel Bassey)

#2283.  Coney Barrett (Holy Spirit --- Jesus Culture)

#2284.  Robert M. Schneider (I Know You Rider --- Grateful Dead)

#2285.  Rob Schneider (Low Rider --- War)

#2286.  Hunter's Laptop (Hunter's Laptop --- Ariel Pink, Winston Marshall, Alex Trimble)

#2287.  Paxton (Captain --- Ween)

#2288.  Fake Coney Barrett (Shake Holy Spirit --- Newworldson)

#2289.  The Real Chip Roy (The Real McCoy --- George Jones)

#2290.  Trumped (Stumped --- Minor Threat)

#2291.  Kari Lake (Coffee Break --- Tony Bennett)

#2292.  Vincent K. Fong (I Might Be Wrong --- Radiohead)

#2293.  Vincent K. Fong (Don't Get Me Wrong --- The Pretenders)

#2294.  Taylor Greene (Halloween --- King Diamond)

#2295.  Kenneth Paxton (I'm Your Captain --- Grand Fuck Railroad)

#2296.  Kushner Is A Jew (All I Wanna Do --- Sheryl Crow)

#2297.  Boebert (T-Shirt --- Foo Fighters)

#2298.  Fong! (Wrong! --- The Mountain Goats)

#2299.  David Tepper (High Ball Stepper --- Jack White)

#2300.  David Tepper Ain't Much Of A Man (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band --- The Beatles)

#2301.  Vince Fong (Love Song --- The Cure) 

#2302.  Mar-a-Lago Piece Of Shit (American Idiot --- Green Day)

#2303.  American Hate (It's Gonna Be Great --- McCormick Spices commercial)

#2304.  Liar (Higher --- Creed)

#2305.  Emmer Feud (Interlude --- The Killers)

#2306.  The Donald Ain't White: An Orange Masquerade (The Future's So Bright: I Gotta Wear Those Shades --- Timbuk 3)

#2307.  Vince Fong (Mike's Song --- Phish)

#2308.  Taylor Greene (Halloween --- The Misfits)

#2309.  Craig Riedel's A Fuckin' Cunt (Needle And The Damage Done --- Neil Young)

#2310.  Colorado (El Dorado --- Agent Orange)

#2311.  Emmer Yes-Man (Enter Sandman --- Metallica)

#2312.  MAGA Johnson (Mrs. Johnson --- Toto)

#2313.  Boeing Joke (Blowing Smoke --- Taylor Ray Holbrook feat. DJ KO)

#2314.  Boeing Had A Door That Was Bad (Goin' Down The Road Feelin' Bad --- Grateful Dead)

#2315.  Craig Riedel Lies (The Needle Lies --- Queensryche) 

#2316.  Austin's Cancer (Private Dancer --- Tina Turner)

#2317.  Pink Hat Lady (Green Eyed Lady --- Sugarloaf)

#2318.  Pink Hatted Lady (Three Times A Lady --- Lionel Richie)

#2319.  Steve Doocy (Loose Lucy --- Grateful Dead)

#2320.  Nancy Mace (In My Place --- Coldplay)

#2321.  Nancy Mace (A Warm Place --- Nine Inch Nails)

#2322.  John Barrasso (She's A Rainbow --- Rolling Stones)

#2323.  Babbitt's Whiter (Rabbit Fighter --- T. Rex)

#2324.  Nancy Ruth Mace (Amazing Grace --- Chris Tomlin)

#2325.  Nancy Mace (Basket Case --- Green Day)

#2326.  God Made Donald Trump For You (God Gave Rock and Roll To You --- Kiss)

#2327.  Jeffrey Landry (Dirty Laundry --- Don Henley)

#2328.  Nancy Mace (Outer Space --- Red Hot Chili Peppers)

#2329.  Risch (Wish --- Nine Inch Nails)

#2330.  Vivekkk (Redneckkk --- Corrosion of Conformity)

#2331.  Donald Shit Show (Cold Rain & Snow --- Grateful Dead)

#2332.  Vivek Shitshow (Redneck Freakshow --- Saliva)

#2333.  Donald Trump's A Very Shitty Christian (Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas --- Frank Sinatra)

#2334.  Donald Is A Clown And His Asshole's Sore (I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For --- U2)

#2335.  Nikki (Piggy --- Nine Inch Nails)

#2336.  Mace (Grace --- Supergrass)

#2337.  Nikki Haley (Kansas City --- Grateful Dead)

#2338.  God Made Trump (Garbage Dump --- Charles Manson)

#2339. Mar-A-Lago Delusional (America The Beautiful --- Willie Nelson & Neil Young)

#2340.  Friendly Crudite (Send Me On My Way --- Rusted Root)

#2341.  Dave McCormick's Toilet Stall (Another Brick In The Wall --- Pink Floyd)

#2342.  The AFC Is Gay (God Bless The U.S.A. --- Lee Greenwood)

#2343.  Chris T. Sununu (Lonely Avenue --- Taj Mahal)

#2344.  Tomasetti (Joshua Tree --- Limbo)

#2345.  Risch Is A Queer (Wish You Were Here --- Pink Floyd)

#2346.  Good Crimes Bad Crimes (Good Times Bad Times --- Led Zeppelin)

#2347.  Humphrey (I'm Free --- The Who)

#2348.  Birdbrain (Train, Train --- Dolly Parton)

#2349.  Birdbrain: Trump Dumbshit (Big Train: From Memphis --- John Fogerty)

#2350.  Nancy Mace (Fireplace --- REM)

#2351.  Nancy Mace (Time & Place --- Queens Of The Stone Age)

#2352.  Nancy Is A Mace Muff Diver (Jerry Is A Race Car Driver --- Primus)

#2353.  Nancy Mace (Human Race --- Three Days Grace)

#2354.  Nancy Mace (Hiding Place --- Don Moen)

#2355.  Foxx Crevasses (Cocks 'n' Asses --- Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds)

#2356.  Navarro (Tomorrow --- Barbra Streisand)

#2357.  Navarro's Wrong (Tomorrow's Song --- Phish)

#2358.  Tomasetti (Joshua Tree --- Carly Rae Jepsen)

#2359.  Vince McMahon (Superman --- R.E.M.)

#2360.  Vince McMahon Fucked Janel Grant (When A Man Loves A Woman --- Michael Bolton)

#2361.  DeWit (Do It --- Neil Diamond)

#2362.  Swift Is A Cunt (Lifted By Love --- k.d. lang)

#2363.  Vince McMahon (Nowhere Man --- The Beatles)

#2364.  Nancy Mace (Off Your Face --- My Bloody Valentine)

#2365.  Shit On Nancy Mace (Grinnin' In Your Face --- Son House)

#2366.  Swift (Lift --- Hillsong UNITED)

#2367.  Congresswoman Beth Van Duyne (Jesus Is On That Main Line --- Aerosmith)

#2368.  James P. Lankford (Off The Record --- My Morning Jacket)

#2369.  Taylor Swift (The Best Gift --- Barbra Streisand)

#2370.  A Swiftie Cunt (A Gift Of Love --- Olivia Newton John w/ Barry Manilow)

#2371.  Not White, The Orange Prolapse Is Fucking You (Tonight, I Celebrate My Love For You --- Roberta Flack & Peabo Bryson)

#2372.  Viktor Orban (Beast Of Burden --- Rolling Stones)

#2373.  Pick Up The Feces (Pick Up the Pieces --- Average White Band)

#2374.  Stormy Romancer (Music Box Dancer --- Frank Mills)

#2375.  Lies (Rise --- Herb Alpert)

#2376.  Ivanka (Cecelia --- Paul Simon)

#2377.  Bitch Mike (Hitch Hike --- Rolling Stones)

#2378.  Mike Johnson (Mike Tyson --- Ginuwine)

#2379.  Nipplegate (Celebrate --- Three Dog Night)

#2380.  Donald Trump Is So Fucked Up (Never Gonna Give You Up --- Rick Astley)

#2381.  'Vanka's A Jew (Into the Groove --- Madonna)

#2382.  Viktor Orban (Wicked Garden --- Stone Temple Pilots)

#2383.  Mike Gill (Free Will --- Rush)

#2384.  Shawn Fein (Airplane --- Rusted Root)

#2385.  Donald's A Cunt (All Out Of Love --- Air Supply)

#2386.  Trump's A Cunt (Burning Up --- Madonna)

#2387.  He's A Piece Of Shit (Give A Little Bit --- Supertramp)

#2388.  Taylor A. Swift (Love Is A Gift --- Olivia Newton-John)

#2389.  Donald Trump's A Clown (You Should Know By Now --- Ratt)

#2390.  Tim Scott (Too Hot --- Kool & The Gang)

#2391.  Gina (Gina --- Blues Traveler)

#2392.  Shithead Lara (Think Of Laura --- Christopher Cross)

#2393.  Tim Sheehy (Honesty --- Billy Joel)

#2394.  Lara (Laura --- Frank Sinatra)

#2395.  She's Congresswoman Nancy Mace (We Gotta Get Out Of This Place --- The Animals)

#2396.  And I Hate Her (And I Love Her --- The Beatles)

#2398.  Donald Trump (Do The Rump --- The Black Keys)

#2399.  Queer Trump It's Raining Men (Here Comes The Rain Again --- The Eurythmics)

#2400.  Donald's A Cunt (Glory Of Love --- Peter Cetera)

#2401.  Conaway (Holiday --- Scorpions)

#2402.  Trumpin' 'n Dumpin' (Humpin' Pumpkin --- Modest Mouse)

#2403.  Michael Bost (Coast To Coast --- Scorpions)

#2404.  Hur's A Cunt (Stir It Up --- Bob Marley)

#2405.  Bost (Ghost --- Pearl Jam)

#2406.  Joe Manchin (Slow Dancin' --- Chaka Kahn & Rick James)

#2407.  Never Surrender Sneakers (Those Damned Blue-Collar Tweekers --- Primus)

#2408.  Donald's Sneakers (Blow Your Speakers --- Manowar)

#2409.  Donald's Sneakers (Hi-Heel Sneakers --- Rolling Stones)

#2410.  Trump Sneakers (Bad Sneakers --- Steely Dan)

#2411.  #45 (#41 --- Dave Matthews Band)

#2412.  Andy Barr (Movie Star --- Cracker)

#2413.  Andy Barr (Superstar --- The Carpenters)

#2414.  Navarro (Tomorrow --- America)

#2415.  Liz Case (Drumz > Space --- Grateful Dead)

#2416.  A Pair Of Gold Sneakers (A Pair Of Old Sneakers --- George Jones & Tammy Wynette)

#2417.  Trump Activist LaCivita (Don't Cry For Me Argentina --- Madonna)

#2418.  Kerwin (Cold Gin --- Kiss)

#2419.  Rubio (Rodeo --- Motley Crue)

#2420.  Chap Cain (Cocaine --- Eric Clapton)

#2421.  Chap Cain (The Chain --- Fleetwood Mac)

#2422.  Shapiro (My Hero --- Foo Fighters)

#2423.  I.V.F. (S.M.F. --- Twisted Sister)

#2424.  Fucking Cunt (Lotta Love --- Neil Young)

#2425.  Cain (Stain --- Nirvana)

#2426.  Stormy's Big Tits (Stormy Pinkness --- They Might Be Giants)

#2427.  Stormy Bradley (Stormy May Day --- AC/DC)

#2428.  Hickland (Quicksand --- Incubus)

#2429.  Enemy Lies (Ebony Lies --- Bob Welch)

#2430.  Hickland (Quicksand --- A Flock Of Seagulls)

#2431.  Boebert (Love Hurts - Nazareth)

#2432.  Scott Perry (Oh, Sherrie --- Steve Perry)

#2433.  Randy Fine (Frankenstein --- Phish)

#2434.  Rubio (Rodeo --- Joan Osborne)

#2435.  Fine (Shine --- Collective Soul)

#2436.  Trump Is Bad (God Is Good --- Don Moen)

#2437.  Trump's An Infection Of The Yeast (God Bless The Children Of The Beast --- Motley Crue)

#2438.  Trump Fucked America (God Bless America --- Violent Femmes)

#2439.  Trump's A Fraud (Metal Gods --- Judas Priest)

#2440.  Robinson's A Fucking Cunt (Carry On My Wayward Son --- Kansas)

#2441.  Super Tuesday (Ruby Tuesday --- Rolling Stones)

#2442.  Erin Hawley Shithead (Holly Jolly Chirstmas --- Harry Connick Jr.)

#2443.  Boebert (T-Shirt --- Foo Fighters)

#2444.  Trump Sneakers (The Seeker --- The Who)

#2445.  Trump's Bullshit (God's Got It --- Old Crow Medicine Show)

#2446.  Vince Fong (Bird Song --- Grateful Dead)

#2447.  LaLota (Zooropa --- U2)

#2448.  Your Trumper Sneakers (Your Nashville Sneakers)

#2449.  Katie Britt (I Love It --- Icona Pop)

#2450.  Britt Fuck (Shit Luck --- Modest Mouse)

#2451.  U Ain't Shit (Katie Britt --- GWAR)

#2452.  Britt Is White (Hit The Lights --- Metallica)

#2453.  Youngkin (Truckin' --- Grateful Dead)

#2454.  Ralph E. Reed Fuckin' Creep (Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap)

#2455.  Reed (Breed --- Nirvana)

#2456.  Laken (Shakin' --- Eddie Money)

#2457.  Chinatown (Funkytown --- Joe Biden)

#2458.  Donald Lies (Hungry Lies --- Eric Carmen)

#2459.  Classified Documents In A Garage In Chinatown (Elderly Woman Behind The Counter In A Small Town --- Pearl Jam)

#2460.  Bobb (Slob --- Weezer)

#2461.  Trump's Gonna Blow (God Always Knows --- Beach Boys)

#2462.  Boebert (Pervert --- The Descendants)

#2463.  Moreno (I Don't Know --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2464.  Reed (Speed --- L.A. Guns)

#2465.  Couy Griffin (Once Bitten --- Peter Tosh)

#2466.  Morrow (Sorrow --- David Bowie)

#2467.  Donald Trump's A Clown (When Love Comes To Town --- U2 & B.B. King)

#2468.  Milley Attacked (Jilly's On Smack --- Primus)

#2469.  Steve Wynn (Locked In --- Judas Priest)

#2470.  Fuckin' Dick Harry Hamm (Electric Uncle Sam --- Primus)

#2471.  Broke Don Fat Ass (Brokedown Palace --- Grateful Dead)

#2472.  Charlie Kirk (Stupid Jerk --- The Angry Samoans)

#2473.  Jared Kushner's A Jew (You Make Me Feel Brand New --- The Stylistics)

#2474.  Mutha Fucka John Eastman (Makisupa Policeman --- Phish)

#2475.  Michelle Morrow (No More Sorrow --- Linkin' Park)

#2476.  Get It Together (Get It Together --- Grand Funk Railroad)

#2477.  Sonny (Money --- Pink Floyd)

#2478.  Frank LaRose (Heaven Knows --- Robert Plant)

#2479.  Nunes (She Says --- Frank Sinatra)

#2480.  Get Get It Togther (Let's Get It Together --- Toots & The Maytals)

#2481.  Kirk (Jerk --- Todd Rundgren)

#2482.  Mar-A-Lago Piece Of Shit (American Idiot --- Green Day)

#2483.  Greene's White (Green Light --- Sonic Youth)

#2484.  Jeff Yass Plan (Big Boss Man --- Grateful Dead)

#2485.  Marjorie Taylor Greene (The Joke And The Queen --- Ed Sheeran w/ Taylor Swift)

#2486.  James Blair (Lord's Prayer --- D-g)

#2487.  Mar-A-Lago (Donald Trump Had A Stormy Affair --- Andy McKenzie)

#2488.  Maddock (Bad Luck --- Social Distortion)

#2489.  Schlapp! (Slap --- Chumbawamba)

#2490.  Matt Schlapp (Mouse Trap --- Ride)

#2491.  marjorie (marjorie --- Taylor Swift)

#2492.  Robert Good (Harry Hood --- Phish) 

#2493.  Taylor Greene (Coming Clean --- Green Day)

#2494.  Mar-A-Lago Creamin' (California Dreamin' --- The Mamas And The Papas)

#2495.  Nicole Shanahan (Portland, Oregon --- Loretta Lynn & Jack White)

#2496.  Robert Hankey (Hanky Panky --- Joan Jett & The Blackhearts)

#2497.  Don Bacon's Shit (Awakening --- Judas Priest)

#2498.  Blevins A Liar (Heaven's On Fire --- Kiss)

#2499.  Cunt, Cunt, Cunt (Fun, Fun, Fun --- Beach Boys)

#2500.  Orange Prolapse (Photograph --- Nickelback)

#2501.  Wes Moss (The Boss --- James Brown)

#2502.  Greene's A Total Shit Show (Queen Of The Rodeo --- Alice In Chains)

#2503.  Brad Knott (Red Hot --- Motley Crue)

#2504.  Gavin Wax (House Of Wax --- Paul McCartney)

#2505.  Harry's Kosher Hamm (Worthy Is the Lamb --- Hillsong UNITED)

#2506.  Gavin Wax (Battle Axe --- Deftones)

#2507.  Lindsey (Mindy --- Barry Manilow)

#2508.  Harry Had A Kosher Hamm (Mary Had A Little Lamb --- Stevie Ray Vaughn)

#2509.  Arizona (My Sharona --- The Knack)

#2510.  Matthew Schlapp (Piece Of Crap --- Neil Young)

#2511.  Johnson's A Cunt (Behind The Sun --- Red Hot Chili Peppers)

#2512.  Shohei Ohtani (Mulligatawny --- Seinfeld episode)

Please do not share this material with Shohei Ohtani and/or former President Donald J. Trump.