Congressman Tom Emmer (R-MN) is the latest poster child for Orange Prolapse sycophancy.
A few months ago, Emmer was a likely candidate (along with Steve Scalise and Jim Jordan) to succeed House Speaker Kevin McCarthy.
But then Trump truth-shitted...
“Voting for a Globalist RINO like Tom Emmer would be a tragic mistake!”
Emmer, a coward and relatively mainstream Republican, immediately dropped out of the race.
A few months later, Emmer would bravely tweet...
“It is time for Republicans to unite behind our party’s clear front-runner, which is why I am proud to endorse Donald J. Trump for President.”
I proudly present Congressman Emmer with these Acrisure Stadium Trump Dumps. Well deserved.
Steelers punched their ticket to the post-season yesterday. They'll shuffle off to Buffalo for a game at Highmark Stadium. Depending on the weather, this one's really tempting. Sunday, January 14 at 1pm.
Steelers being 10 point road underdogs seems really steep. Even with TJ Twat out. Over/under at 41.5. Last time I was at Highmark, it was called Rich Stadium. And it was back in 1992 for the summer opener of the Grateful Dead. Good time.
Emmer Yes-Man
sonofsaf
Pubic hair, of a cunt
And his steak, well done
Donald Trump’s number one
Big Mac shittin’, double chin
Stop the steal for the win
Tom the yes-man he cums
Trump Vodka’s so dope and
Grab another Bud Light
Trump is right
MAGA fight
Coup’s the plan
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
Trump is strong, take a bite
Stormy’s tits alright
And the courts will indict
Stormy whore, fury fire
Donald Trump’s a liar
Grand ‘ol party ain’t right
Trump Vodka’s so dope and
Grab another Bud Light
Trump is right
MAGA fight
Coup’s the plan
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
Forty-five’s a total creep
Hang Mike Pence his fuckin’ veep
The big lie the news is fake
Hang Mike Pence for goodness sake
Orange Prolapse baby, will shit a turd
His existence is so absurd
McDonald’s feasts breakfast in bed
Donald Trump should, just drop dead
Trump is right
MAGA fight
Promised land
Trump is right
MAGA fight
Coup’s the plan
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
Coup’s the plan
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
Coup’s the plan
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
And from the ballot—, he’ll be banned
Enter Sandman
Metallica
Say your prayers, little one
Don't forget, my son
To include everyone
I tuck you in, warm within
Keep you free from sin
Till the Sandman he comes
Sleep with one eye open
Gripping your pillow tight
Exit light
Enter night
Take my hand
We're off to Never—, Neverland
Something's wrong, shut the light
Heavy thoughts tonight
And they aren't of Snow White
Dreams of war, dreams of liars
Dreams of dragon's fire
And of things that will bite
Sleep with one eye open
Gripping your pillow tight
Exit light
Enter night
Take my hand
We're off to Never—, Neverland
Now I lay me down to sleep
Pray the Lord my soul to keep
If I die before I wake
Pray the Lord my soul to take
Hush little baby, don't say a word
And never mind that noise you heard
It's just the beasts under your bed
In your closet, in your head
Exit light
Enter night
Grain of sand
Exit light
Enter night
Take my hand
We're off to Never—, Neverland
We're off to Never—, Neverland
Take my hand
We're off to Never—, Neverland
Take my hand
We're off to Never—, Neverland
We're off to Never—, Neverland
We're off to Never—, Neverland
We're off to Never—, Neverland
My third Metallica Enter Sandman-related parody.
#353. Enter Caitlyn (a sexy tribute to Caitlyn Jenner)
#2311. Emmer Yes-Man
From 1988 to the present, Metallica has rocked the Burgh a grand total of 11 times.
Metallica:
6-15-88, Three Rivers Stadium, Pittsburgh, PA (Monsters of Cock --- along with Van Halen, Scorpions, Dokken, Kingdumb Cum)
6-22-88, Rubber Bowl, Akron, OH (Monsters of Cock)
11-18-88, Cincinnati Gardens, Cincinnati, OH (Queensryche opened)
4-16-89, Hara Arena, Dayton, OH (Queensryche opened)
7-26-92, Three Rivers Stadium, Pittsburgh, PA (w/ Guns'n'Roses & Faith No More)
3-26-97, Civic Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
10-18-18, PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
The Big Lie 100: (#1448)
#2216. For Trump (Her Strut --- Bob Seger)
#2217. Mark Green (Green Beans --- Animal Collective)
#2218. Song For The Trumped (Song For The Dumped --- Ben Folds Five)
#2219. Trumped (Chumped --- Joyce Manor)
#2220. Lahmeyer (Desire --- U2)
#2221. Trumper (Kiss --- Strutter)
#2222. Prolapse Stain: Forty-Five (Morning Train: Nine To Five --- Sheena Easton)
#2223. Strong (Wrong --- Lindsey Buckingham)
#2224. Gilberry (Hail Mary --- Alice Cooper)
#2225. Perry's Pissed (Cherry Twist --- Crystal Method)
#2226. Go Musk Yourself (Go Fuck Yourself --- Two Feet)
#2227. Perry (Cherry - U.F.O.)
#2228. Strong Is A Clown (Wrong Side Of Town)
#2229. Trumpy Little Bitch And Cunt (Crazy Little Thing Called Love --- Queen)
#2230. Gilberry (Hail Mary --- Testament)
#2231. Christian Ziegler (Sister Christian --- Night Ranger)
#2232. Forty-Five (9 to 5 --- Dolly Parton)
#2233. Tesla Sucks (Thunderstruck --- AC/DC)
#2234. 5K (Birthday --- Paul McCartney)
#2235. Florida State Got Fuckin' Screwed (Overweight But Over You --- The Vaselines)
#2236. Kennedy (Ecstasy --- PJ Harvey)
#2237. Mr. Kevin Cramer (Mr. Entertainer --- Men At Work)
#2238. Kennedy (Faithfully --- Journey)
#2239. Strong (Wrong --- Waylon Jennings)
#2240. DeNiro (My Hero --- Foo Fighters)
#2241. Swift (Rift --- Phish)
#2242. Tay Tay Tay (Say Say Say --- Michael Jackson & Paul McCartney)
#2243. Travis (Krampus --- Houndmouth)
#2244. Strong's Gay (Wrong Way --- Creed)
#2245. Hostetter (Shoplifter --- Green Day)
#2246. Donald Trump Is An Orange Clown (London Bridge Is Falling Down --- Cocomelon)
#2247. Donald Trump Is A Retard (Twinkle Twinkle Little Star --- Olivia Newton-John)
#2248. Bland Is A Cunt (Band On The Run --- Paul McCartney)
#2249. Kennedy (Destiny --- Journey)
#2250. Dictator (Heartbreaker --- Pat Benatar)
#2251. Kenneth Paxton (Love Boat Captain)
#2252. The Digital Mugshot Edition (To Defy The Laws Of Tradition --- Primus)
#2253. Trump Tower (Sunflower --- Neil Diamond)
#2254. Kid Rock Will Dine (I Walk The Line --- Johnny Cash)
#2255. Playin' The Browns (Send In The Clowns --- Barbara Streisand)
#2256. Foxmania (Albania --- Nicholas Colasanto / Cheers Episode)
#2257. Guy Reschenthaler (Dollar For Dollar --- They Might Be Giants)
#2258. Reschenthaler (Dollar, Dollar --- PJ Harvey)
#2259. Kid's Cock (We Rock --- Dio)
#2260. Reschenthaler (Greenback Dollar --- Woody Guthrie)
#2261. It's Hunter's Laptop From Hell (I Think I'm Going To Hell --- My Morning Jacket)
#2262. Laptop Hell (Silver Bells --- Dean Martin)
#2263. Good! (Would? --- Alice In Chains)
#2264. The Tower Of Trump (The Power Of Love --- Huey Lewis & The News)
#2265. Good Times (Good Times --- Jim Gilstrap, Blinky Williams and a gospel choir)
#2266. Laptop From Hell (Highway To Hell --- AC/DC)
#2267. Colby Covington (You Are Number One --- The Whispers)
#2268. If Bob Good (If I Could --- Phish)
#2269. Moreno (Tornado --- Garbage)
#2270. Cum Coney Barrett (Come Holy Spirit --- Planetshakers)
#2271. Coney Barrett Cum (Holy Spirit Come --- Hillsong UNITED)
#2272. Coney Barrett Cum (Holy Spirit Come --- Rita Springer)
#2273. Coney Barrett (Holy Spirit --- Travis Cottrell)
#2274. Coney Barrett (Holy Spirit --- Neville Brothers)
#2275. Kushner's Wife Is A Fucking Jew (All I Want For Christmas Is You --- Mariah Carey)
#2276. Colorado (Desperado --- The Eagles)
#2277. Detroit Pistons (Sister Christian --- Night Ranger)
#2278. Isn't Very White (Couldn't Get It Right --- Climax Blues Band)
#2279. Rudolph, the Yinzer Steeler (Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer)
#2280. Big Mac Meat (Shakedown Street --- Grateful Dead)
#2281. Strong's Gay (Wrong Way --- Sublime)
#2282. Coney Barrett Cum (Holy Spirit Come --- Nathaniel Bassey)
#2283. Coney Barrett (Holy Spirit --- Jesus Culture)
#2284. Robert M. Schneider (I Know You Rider --- Grateful Dead)
#2285. Rob Schneider (Low Rider --- War)
#2286. Hunter's Laptop (Hunter's Laptop --- Ariel Pink, Winston Marshall, Alex Trimble)
#2287. Paxton (Captain --- Ween)
#2288. Fake Coney Barrett (Shake Holy Spirit --- Newworldson)
#2289. The Real Chip Roy (The Real McCoy --- George Jones)
#2290. Trumped (Stumped --- Minor Threat)
#2291. Kari Lake (Coffee Break --- Tony Bennett)
#2292. Vincent K. Fong (I Might Be Wrong --- Radiohead)
#2293. Vincent K. Fong (Don't Get Me Wrong --- The Pretenders)
#2294. Taylor Greene (Halloween --- King Diamond)
#2295. Kenneth Paxton (I'm Your Captain --- Grand Fuck Railroad)
#2296. Kushner Is A Jew (All I Wanna Do --- Sheryl Crow)
#2297. Boebert (T-Shirt --- Foo Fighters)
#2298. Fong! (Wrong! --- The Mountain Goats)
#2299. David Tepper (High Ball Stepper --- Jack White)
#2300. David Tepper Ain't Much Of A Man (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band --- The Beatles)
#2301. Vince Fong (Love Song --- The Cure)
#2302. Mar-a-Lago Piece Of Shit (American Idiot --- Green Day)
#2303. American Hate (It's Gonna Be Great --- McCormick Spices commercial)
#2304. Liar (Higher --- Creed)
#2305. Emmer Feud (Interlude --- The Killers)
#2306. The Donald Ain't White: An Orange Masquerade (The Future's So Bright: I Gotta Wear Those Shades --- Timbuk 3)
#2307. Vince Fong (Mike's Song --- Phish)
#2308. Taylor Greene (Halloween --- The Misfits)
#2309. Craig Riedel's A Fuckin' Cunt (Needle And The Damage Done --- Neil Young)
#2310. Colorado (El Dorado --- Agent Orange)
#2311. Emmer Yes-Man (Enter Sandman --- Metallica)
Please do not share this material with Tom Emmer (R-MN) and/or former President Donald J. Trump.
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