#297. Nikki

Nikki Haley has a New York Times bestseller!  She's defending America with grit and grace, er uh... shit and mace.

With all due respect, she's just a sycophantic panderer.  Not as bad as former VPavlovian lapdog Mike Pence.  But seriously, that midwest Hoosier, er uh, Hoser dude is pretty tough to beat.

Nikki
sonofsaf

Oh Nikki, you're the shit
You're the shit Trump loves your tits, hey Nikki,
Hey Nikki

Oh Nikki, you're the shit
You're the shit Trump loves your tits, hey Nikki,
Hey Nikki

Oh Nikki, you're the shit
You're the shit Trump loves your tits, hey Nikki,
Hey Nikki

Oh Nikki, you're the shit
You're the shit Trump loves your tits, hey Nikki,
Hey Nikki!

It’s a twenty four fight not lookin’ very strong
You wishin’ you was white not a nigger to your throng
Why would you wanna fight just go back to your home, Nikki

I’m sure it is a thrill, you think you got the votes
You better take your pills, maybe, please maybe don't
When Trump calls you go runnin’ for the phone, Nikki
 
Oh Nikki, ass is shitty you don’t have a plan
You fucked us from the start like the orange prolapsing man
Oh Nikki, you're so shitty, still ain’t got no plan
A bitch like you Nikki
Oh, how you screw Nikki, screw Nikki
Cunt a la carte, Nikki

Hey Nikki!
Now when you play to Trump yahoos and give them jobs to blow
What have you got to lose just let that pubic hair grow
It’s somethin’ you can groom, a beaver show, Nikki

So will you cum all over me a Bukake fan
I’m from the land of India, I’m not from Pakistan
Oh please, baby, please, don't say it’s all a scam, Nikki

Oh Nikki, ass is shitty you don’t have a plan
You fucked us from the start like the orange prolapsing man
Oh Nikki, you're so shitty, still ain’t got no plan
A bitch like you Nikki
Oh, how you screw Nikki, screw Nikki
Cunt a la carte, Nikki

Oh Nikki, you're the shit
You're the shit Trump loves your tits, hey Nikki,
Hey Nikki!

Oh Nikki, you're the shit
You're the shit Trump loves your tits, hey Nikki,
Hey Nikki!

Oh Nikki, you're the shit
You're the shit Trump loves your tits, hey Nikki,
Hey Nikki!

Oh Nikki, you're the shit
You're the shit Trump loves your tits, hey Nikki,

Oh Nikki, ass is shitty you don’t have a plan
You fucked us from the start like the orange prolapsing man
Oh Nikki, you're so shitty, still ain’t got no plan
A bitch like you Nikki
Oh, how you screw Nikki, screw Nikki
Cunt a la carte, Nikki

Oh Nikki, ass is shitty you don’t have a plan
You fucked us from the start like the orange prolapsing man
Oh Nikki, you're so shitty, still ain’t got no plan
A bitch like you Nikki
Oh, how you screw Nikki, screw Nikki
Cunt a la carte, Nikki

Oh Nikki, ass is shitty you don’t have a plan
You fucked us from the start like the orange prolapsing man
Oh Nikki, you're so shitty, still ain’t got no plan
A bitch like you Nikki
Oh, how you screw Nikki, screw Nikki
Cunt a la carte, Nikki

Oh Nikki, ass is shitty you don’t have a plan
You fucked us from the start like the orange prolapsing man
Oh Nikki, you're so shitty, still ain’t got no plan
A bitch like you Nikki

 

 

Mickey
Toni Basil

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey,
Hey Mickey

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey,
Hey Mickey

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey,
Hey Mickey

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey,
Hey Mickey!

You've been around all night and that's a little long
You think you've got the right but I think you've got it wrong
Why can't you say goodnight so you can take me home, Mickey

'Cause when you say you will, it always means you won't
You're givin' me the chills, baby, please baby don't
Every night you still leave me all alone, Mickey

Oh Mickey, what a pity you don't understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey, you're so pretty, can't you understand
It's guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey, do Mickey
Don't break my heart, Mickey

Hey Mickey!
Now when you take me by the hooves everyone's gonna know
Every time you move I let a little more show
There's somethin' we can use, so don't say no, Mickey

So come on and give it to me any way you can
Any way you wanna do it, I'll treat you like a man
Oh please, baby, please, don't leave me in a jam, Mickey

Oh Mickey, what a pity you don't understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey, you're so pretty, can't you understand
It's guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey, do Mickey
Don't break my heart, Mickey

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey
Hey Mickey

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey
Hey Mickey

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey
Hey Mickey

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey

Oh Mickey, what a pity you don't understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey, you're so pretty, can't you understand
It's guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey, do Mickey
Don't break my heart, Mickey

Oh Mickey, what a pity you don't understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey, you're so pretty, can't you understand
It's guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey, do Mickey
Don't break my heart, Mickey

Oh Mickey, what a pity you don't understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey, you're so pretty, can't you understand
It's guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey, do Mickey
Don't break my heart, Mickey

Oh Mickey, what a pity you don't understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey, you're so pretty, can't you understand
It's guys like you Mickey

Just out of sheer curiosity, I checked out Toni Basel's touring history.  You know, to see if she has ever "played" in the Burgh.  Turns out that she has only performed her one-hit wonder song "Mickey" live in concert on two occasions:

April 7, 1987, The Joan Rivers Show, Los Angeles, CA (video above)

November 12, 2018, Whitehall Theatre, Dundee, Scotland

Considering how it's been a longstanding pop hit, I just thought that seemed kinda peculiar.

Please do not share this material with former UN Ambassador Nikki Haley (R-SC), former Vice President Mike Pence (R-IN), and/or any other asspirational (unintentional typo) Republican presidential contenders in 2024.  Many regaling songs have already been written.  Many more are on the event horizon.