#300. Nikki Give Me A Hummer

I've written several parodies about 2024 presidential aspirant Nikki Haley.  

Nikki (Toni Basil's "Hey Mickey")

Nikk It Up (Kiss's "Lick It Up")

Snarling Nikki (Prince's "Darling Nikki")

She's essentially the gift that keeps on giving.  

(Nikki Haley strategizes with the Orange Prolapse.)

A middle aged woman in a sea of old, white misogynists.  A darker complected Indian-American awash in an albino redneck tsunami.  Someone willing to speak out against racism against a backdrop of confederate flag-waving MAGA insurrectionists.  A credible conservative amongst a flurry of evangelical, conspiratorial fanatics.  Like I was saying.  In my world of polarody (political parody), she is an unparalleled, philanthropic gift.  And I haven't even started in on her last name.

Nikki Give Me A Hummer
sonofsaf

You’ve been deceivin’, that's okay
You thought runnin’ for President would be so much fun
I suggested you kill yourself, and use a gun
We think you fucked us from the start

Nikki, give me a hummer
You don't wanna suck nobody else
Stick it deep in your asshole for yourself
Rikki, give me a hummer
Send me dick pics from your phone
We didn’t know you were transgendered

You really blow

You know that orange clown, he has no shame
He is dumpster diving out Mar-A-Lago
You should find out who’s next to blame, for the show
We know you fucked us from the start

Nikki, give me a hummer
You don't wanna suck nobody else
Stick it deep in your asshole for yourself
Rikki, give me a hummer
Send me dick pics from your phone
We didn’t know you were transgendered

You really blow

McDonald’s is where you shall dine
Big Mac and fries would be so fine
We know you fucked us from the start

Nikki, give me a hummer
You don't wanna suck nobody else
Stick it deep in your asshole for yourself
Rikki, give me a hummer
Send me dick pics from your phone
We didn’t know you were transgendered

You really blow

Nikki, give me a hummer
Nikki, give me a hummer
Nikki, give me a hummer

Rikki Don’t Lose That Number
Steely Dan

We hear you're leavin', that's okay
I thought our little wild time had just begun
I guessed you kind of scared yourself, you turn and run
But if you have a change of heart

Rikki, don't lose that number
You don't wanna call nobody else
Send it off in a letter to yourself
Rikki, don't lose that number
It's the only one you own
You might use it if you feel better

When you get home

I have a friend in town, he's heard your name
We can go out driving on Slow Hand Row
We could stay inside and play games, I don't know
And you could have a change of heart

Rikki, don't lose that number
You don't wanna call nobody else
Send it off in a letter to yourself
Rikki, don't lose that number
It's the only one you own
You might use it if you feel better

When you get home

You tell yourself you're not my kind
But you don't even know your mind
And you could have a change of heart

Rikki, don't lose that number
You don't wanna call nobody else
Send it off in a letter to yourself
Rikki, don't lose that number
It's the only one you own
You might use it if you feel better

When you get home

Rikki, don't lose that number
Rikki, don't lose that number
Rikki, don't lose that number

Steely Dan:

7-2-00, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

8-30-06, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA 

 7-7-16, First Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

10-8-18, Heinz Hall, Pittsburgh, PA

Please do not share this material with former Governor and United Nations Ambassador Nikki Haley (R-SC).