Monday, September 22, 2008

I can't believe this

They went ahead with the Scranton town hall meeting. For some reason, they removed it from his website. Maybe that was their way of avoiding calls for ticket requests. I'm pretty sick about this but I was currently childless so I guess it was a no-go anyway.
Now I heard McCain is stopping in Ohio today after his victory rally in Media, PA. They don't even mention it on his website. How could there be such poor technological gaps between his website and his campaign?

Alright, I just had to add this. The six questions at this "town hall meeting" were the exact same six questions posed to Hillary Clinton at a similar town hall in New York City from a few months ago. Apparently, they all dealt exclusively with Irish-American issues. I guess he had some prepared answers which is understandable. So much for extemperaneous speaking.
All in all, I'd have to say it's a relief that the whole Scranton debacle is over. My heart has been racing for the past few days and I haven't gotten much sleep. I'm still determined to make an impact of some kind.
Good god, I'm watching MSNBC and they have Palin meeting w/ Bono, and the presidents of Iraq, Pakistan and Afghanistan. I knew she was meeting with Hamid Karzai, but this is starting to get absurd. I guess McCain feels that if they can get a few photo ops with leaders of dangerous countries, they can put together a good tv commercial which touts her foreign policy experience. What a fucking joke. Their campaign is getting more preposterous than even I could have fathomed.

Saturday, September 20, 2008


They just removed the McCain Scranton town hall meeting from his website. They must have just decided to cancel it for undetermined reasons. They're still going ahead with a victory rally on Monday in Media, PA. What a relief. So maybe there is a higher entity at work here. Maybe there is a spiritual force at work trying to draw McCain closer to me. Maybe Johnstown, PA? Maybe some Columbus suburb? Zanesville? Who knows. Let's just stay on top of this and keep an eye out.

the plan, continued

Well, McCain is giving us an in. He has a town hall meeting in Scranton, Pa on monday morniing. Not a victory rally, but a bonafide question & answer session. I thought I might have this one girl ready to go, but apparently, she didn't like the idea of speaking in front of a crowd. I still have another 10 yr. old lined up but I'm pretty sure her mother will nix it because of the long drive and her missing a school day. I'd say the odds are about 6% if I had to put a number on it. How sad. I'm pretty sure this will be our only credible chance.
I even modified the fake question that would get submitted. Check this out.
"Senator McCain, who do you like better, the Pittsburgh Steelers or the Philadelphia Eagles?" To top it off, you discreetly tell the organizer that you have a ZINGER of an answer if the Senator wants to use it. You quietly mention he should respond, "Well, that's a tough question? I think I'll have to take a page out of my opponent's playbook and answer PRESENT." This is great shit, because McCain has been nailing Obama with the fact that he sometimes votes "present" rather than yea or nay. This is probably one of his more credible attack strategies. I guarantee - it would bring the fucking house down. This fake answer is even better than the fake question. The Steelers/Eagles question has even more significance becuase of the Scranton location and the fact that they'll play each other the day before in Philly. Plus, politicians almost never take sides in sporting events - it's a no-win. The only one I've ever seen pull it off is Ed Rendell (Philly mayor, PA governor).
Then, instead you fuckin' nail him with the email question or the a stripped down version of the dinosaur question (refer to my previous blog). I actually prefer the dinosaur question - you could even open with the "grandpa" comment. "Grandpa, errr uhh, Mr. McCain, my grandpa and I love dinosaurs....."
Well, the tickets must be acquired today. I'm currently experiencing immense feelings of trepidation. I just have serious doubts that she'll go for it, despite my sincerest attempts to convince her. I hate to pose an open-ended question like this in print, but "Does anyone have a cute 10 year old girl I can borrow for 24 hours? And would you like an all expenses 24 hour vacation trip to glorious downtown Scranton, Pennsylvania?" Someone out there, Please Help Me.
The more I think about it, it becomes apparent that this campaign will soon explore new unseen lows. We've already seen the McCain attempts to mock and ridicule Obama. Ooooh, he's a celebrity like Paris Hilton - remember those ads? They were obviously an attempt to patronize Obama. I thought they were so over-the-top that they lost all credibility. But I'll also admit that, there is a segment of the populace the ads would appeal to. If you think about it, Obama has recently started a routine where he refers to the "old boys" network and that McCain has been in the Senate for almost 30 years. Certainly not a vitriolic attack, yet definitely an attempt to define him as old, out of touch, part of the beltway network, etc. The candidates can't come out and say, "he's black" or "he's old", but the 527s can act with relative impunity. I expect one of the unendorsed 527 ads on either side to go too far. And I think there could be a backlash. It'll probably come in the form of an internet ad, something a little less mainstream. Something to watch for as crunch time appraoches.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Sarah Palin

Hailing from the arctic tundra, of a town called Wasilla
The creationists love her, she's a real thrilla

McCain spent a great deal of time, contemplating her as his Vice
Gimme a fuckin' break, talk about a roll of the dice

Choosing her is something, that just can't be faked
When I think of Alaska, I prefer that it's baked

The tanning bed fiasco, isn't really that funny
but at least it was paid for, with her own money

The Bridge to Nowhere, now ain't that some shit
She voted for it, before she was against it

Piper's a great name, an unusual characterization
Maybe it was Rowdy Roddy, who served as the inspiration

The Republicans claim, that their kids ain't wild
so Bristol's off limits, cuz she's currently with child

Willow's a fun name, for you or for me
If you were a flower, and I was a tree

The oldest son, his name is Track
It seems appropriate, that he's off in Iraq

She's often known, for her various quotes
A feeble attempt, to garner some votes

"You can't put lipstick on a pig!"
Her other son agrees, his name is Trig

Now I just heard, that her email was hacked
But her password was "Sarah," so it was easily cracked

When McCain picked her, it was easy to make the case
a religious extremist, to energize the base

But one thing's for certain, that if you vote Palin
The next 4 years, our guvmint be a failin'

Monday, September 15, 2008

The plan

Alright, the plan to take down John McCain is taking shape. Normally, I'd maintain a certain level of discretion and not divulge details of the operation, but I really wanted to get this whole black-op in writing. Plus, the only perosn who reads this thing is Amanda. Also, if you take the time read it, perhaps you'll have some valuable input. Feel free to give me a call.
In the final 7 weeks of the campaign, there is a good possiblity that John McCain will schedule a town-hall style meeting in the area. He has a campaign stop near Youngstown tomorrow, but that's more of a "victory rally." He has a town hall meeting later in the week in Michigan, but that's a little too far. I'm sure he'll hit the Pittsburgh and or East Ohio area within the next month or so. At one of these town hall meetings, there will be a plant in the audience. This "plant" will be in the form of a girl and boy, roughly 8-10 years of age. I already have three children in mind. It is not uncommon for a child to ask the candidate a question at these events. They must usually submit the question in advance, so it's imperative to have the "fake" questions ready to roll. The two fugazi questions...

From the female child, "Senator McCain, I love soccer. Your running mate likes hockey. Which do you think is better and why?" I want her wearing a "modern Shirly Templesque outfit a la good ship lollipop."
From the male child, "Senator McCain, Can you write me a note for my teacher so I don't have to do tonight's homework?" I want this kid wearing a McCain/Palin 2008 t-shirt.

Obviously, these questions will not be posed. The real questions will closely resemble the following.

Assuming the town hall meeting takes place near Pittsburgh, the male or female child will ask this question. "Mr. McCain, we just went to the Carnegie Science Center and saw the dinosaurs. I love dinosaurs. Your running mate thinks they're only 4,000 years old. I think there a hundred million years old. Which one of us is right?"
This question is an absolute killer. First off, because his campaign is so poorly managed, I doubt McCain is well vetted concerning oddball questions about Palin. I'm sure he has answers for her stances on energy, trooper-gate and most other things, but I seriously doubt he has a solid response for this line of attack. The beauty of the question is that it leaves McCain stammering and disoriented. This question basically follows the line, "How many times have you beaten your wife?" There's no good way to repsond, especially to a child. And even better, the child can pretty much say anything he wants and get away with it. The whole "dinosaur" question works on a few different levels. First, it makes Palin look like an oddball creationist, whether she is or not. Doesn't really matter - it's all about the perception. Second, it invokes the fake internet quotes about how dinosaurs are "the lizards of Satan" and how it was part of god's plan for them to become extinct - so they could become fuel to power our pickup trucks and snowmobiles. This stuff has a life of its own, especially when a child brings it to the forefront.
Regardless, of McCain's answer, we'll have the after-interviews ready to go. I like the idea of myself being interviewed on the local news. "Well, I had very intention of voting for McCain until that kid asked that one question. I'm just not sure I want a Vice-President who thinks dinosaurs and humans coexisted. I mean, does she really belive in the Flintstones? That's just a bit too unsettling."
Another response, "To be honest, I'm still undecided. But I'll tell you what, I don't think I like his education platform if it includes teaching kids that dinsoaurs roamed the earth about 5,000 years ago."
And of course, I'll have some brief letters to the editor and a few select national periodicals (definitely USA Today) ready to go. My new Pittsburgh connection will come in very handy helping to assure the after-comments make the news.
The second question (probably from the male child) has two variations. "Mr. McCain, I got an email that says you don't know how to use email. Would you like me to show you how?" or "Grandpa, (nervously) errr uhhh, Mr. McCain, my grandpa says you don't know how to send an email. Would you like me to show you how?"
This question works on a few levels as well. First, it's embarrassingly true. The good senator has been on record several times saying, "I don't use email" and similar stuff to that effect. This reveals him as an old-timer who's not in sync with even the simplest modern technology. Plus, just the mere thought of a child teaching Grandpa McCain how to press the send button is great late-night talk show material. The interviews that would follow for the news would include the following - "Maybe Sentaor McCain should appoint that kid to a cabinet level position. Sounded like maybe he could use a technology czar." or "John McCain, email really isn't that confusing. All you do is hit the button that says inobx."
After the 2 questions have been posed (not at the same event - that's highly unlikely you'd get to drill off both questions), you could offer this one up, "Well, I've heard of the vast right wing conspiracy, but I think John McCain has a problem with the vast 8 year old conspiracy."
The most important part is to have the after-blitz READY TO ROLL. MSNBC and other mainstream news outlets would love nothing more than to have a slightly, smart-alecky kid taking on John McCain. Makes for great you-tube fodder as well as instant cult-celebrity status for the child. I could even forsee a late night talk show appearance on Leno or Letterman. We'll need a little luck, too. McCain has shown a strong committment to the town-hall style format. This could be his achilles heal. The next 7 weeks could offer up one of the greatest opportunities - to hijack the 2008 election. Would I like to be a part of this historic endeavor? Sure. Why not?
This entire operation hinges upon one central theme. It's difficult for a voter to cast a ballot for a politician that has been mocked or made a fool of. Remember, that Bush commercial with Dukakis wearing the helmet when he was going for a ride in the tank. That one commercial absolutely butchered his campaign. Most people take their vote very personally. The last thing you want to do is vote for the guy who looks like a fool, because it will make you feel like a fool.
This entire campaign is crying out for one big watershed event. You can argue all you want about taxes, govt. spending, the war, etc. until you're blue in the face. The real truth - the country is still divided right down the middle. The timing and placement for this scheme is just way too obvious. And the media would EAT IT UP... They'd eat it up faster than Anna Ashby Anna Grubler German shotput artist. One day the world will hear her words. This proclamation will resonate through the swing states. "LEAVE ME ALONE! I"M EATIN."

Monday, September 08, 2008

opening day

Yesterday I took the regulars and another couple to the Steelers (-6.5)/Texans home opener. Of course there were some minor electrical issues with the black limo, so we switched to the Escalade. I have a hunch we are about to revisit the same problems from a year ago with this frayed wire. Ahhh, if only I had a nickel for everytime this has happened - I'd probably have 85 cents. Smooth ride up. Surprisingly, no traffic whatsoever. We got to the stadium about 12:15pm. I dumped them off and parked in the crack district (my usual spot on Federal Street). I thought scoring a ticket would be difficult (nice weather, opening day) so I hustled down to the stadium. I ran into a scalper who had a "fan" of 5-6 tickets. I normally don't approach scalpers, but asked him how much for a single. He said, "Make me an offer, you tell me." I repsonded, "How about twenty?" He stammered, "C'mon man, it's 80 face." I started to walk away and he said, "Alright, 40." I resisted, "No, I'll go 20." He flashed me a look of tepid disgust, "Alright, 20." Truth be told, the closer I got to the stadium, there were plenty of tickets. Here's some candid advice for the "professional" scalpers. If you know there is a ticket glut, don't display your tix in a "fanned " format. It reveals your hand. In retrospect, this was an easy one. The next home game will not be - Monday night against the Purple Browns. As I made my way to the stadium, 4 blackhawks did a low level flyover. NICE. One of them had a Steelers logo painted on it. Bad Ass. I made my way to Gate A, took my usual place standing on a bench and watched the crowd go in. I hung out in the pit for the first half. Steelers looked tough, better than I expected (21-3 at the half).
They introduced Charlie Daniels at halftime. "He's here to sing his newest song In America." Well, he strolls out to the 50 yard line with an acoustic guitar. For some reason, they pipe in a different song though the Heinz Field PA. They've got him out there solo with an acoustic guitar and he's singing his song. Meanwhile, "The Legend of Wooley Swamp" is playing in the background. What a fuck up. I think Charlie, kept expecting them to switch the sound. They didn't. What made it truly funny was that he kept singing acoustic and they've got a song playing with a full blown band. This was the most disastrous case of lip-synching I've ever seen. I guess it's really not lip-synching though. With lip-synched shit, you can be a little off, but at least you use the same song.
Anyhoo, I zipped them back to Belldirty and went home to grab a shower. They called a couple hours later and the night was finished. Something was a tad askew when I dropped them off. Oh yeah. it was light out (around 7pm). The best news of the day - I found out they sell Lone Star beef Jerky at the Claysville Exxon. What a score. Speaking of scores...

Steelers 38
Texans 17

I almost forgot to mention. During the first half, this guy yells out, "Tom Brady got his leg broken. There is a god!" My section of the pit erupted in jubilation. A couple guys were high-fiving each other. Another inquired, "Sweet, who's Brady's back-up? I'm going to snag him for my fantasy team." It's nice to see people celebrate the misery of others.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008


For those of you know me, my deepest sympathies. No seriously, for those of you who know me, you know 4 things for certain. I live on a street in a relatively secluded area. I share a driveway with my immediate neighbor. I don't like this neighbor. And, he has a gate. For the past 3 years, both he and his gate have been a source of amusement and disgust. When I first moved in, he had the property immediately surveyed - he explained this was merely to delineate the property boundaries. This was one of the 5 occasions where we have spoken. I'm not going to explain why we don't have cordial, neighborly relations. In fact, for the sake of this blog, I'll gladly admit that I'm a complete asshole and he's the greatest person in the world. Done.
Let's go back to our initial meeting 3 years ago. A few things stood out in my mind. He told me he was going to build a fence bewteen our yards because, "I knew Mrs. Allen (the former deceased owner of my house), but I don't know you." This just struck me as a bit hash and unpleasant. Then he reprimanded me for not knocking on his door and introducing myself when I first moved in. This made me think - shouldn't he be the one to knock on my door and bring me a cake or something. He basically concluded with the sentiment, "It's really quiet up here so if you mind your business, I'll mind mine." Let me be blunt. This guy ain't going to win any Neighbor of the Year awards. Anyway, that was fine with me because there's enough distance between our properties and we really don't need to be in constant contact and I have no interest in engaging him socially. That's my immediate neighbor.
Now I also have some other neighbors. Becky and Jake live right next to his precious gate at the bottom of the driveway. This couple and I have become good friends. They feed me, clothe me and bathe me. Well, that's a slight exaggeration, but you get the drift. I spend a great deal of time with these two and their mutual friends. Basically, knowing these two easily outweighs any of the misgivings I might have about gateman.
I've always thought that the gate itself was pretty lame.

A. We live in Wheeling, WV - is a gate necessary.
B. It makes it incredibly difficult for people to turn around.
C. It represents an obnoxious precedent for exclusion rather than inclusiveness. This suits him well, not me.
D. It adds an extra dimension of danger in the winter when the road is icy.
E. It's prone to breaking down.
F. He has it decorated with a wreath and lights during the holiday season.
Honestly, I could probably think of another 10 or so.

About a month ago, a tree fell on Becky and Jake's house. A section of the tree also fell near the gate and snapped the power line. Damage was pretty extensive. Well, gateman had a crew come and clear the street so we could get to our homes unabated by the "remains of monster tree." A nice and timely gesture. Well done. After that incident, the gate has remained open for a month straight. It hasn't closed since the incident. Why? Why? What convinced him to leave it open? Well... last night I was hanging with Jake and Becky (steak, twice baked potato and salad - a superior dining experience). I was a little buzzed last night - went golfing earlier and we were drinking a lot of wine. We started conversing about the gate and the odd property boundaries. We spoke about the split rail fence he erected so nobody could park near his lower property, how he had the mechaincal box bolted shut so nobody could manually open the gate, his Private Drive sign and the never-ending discussion about the infamous gate. Still, why has he left it open for the past month? We slowly started to unravel the historical tapestry of the gate, the drive and the property boundaries. See, I own a little sliver of property down near the gate. I've never really thought about it too much. I just know it's mine and that's the way the boundaries were drawn. From time to time, I'd go down with a weed wacker and clean it up a little. But for the most part, I've just wanted to avoid any issues with that little section of land. And I have no interest whatsoever in the maintenance of the gate.
Well, as I said, last night the wine was flowing and I had a biblical revelation of sorts, some kind of atheistic awakening. It all dawned on me at once.
I own his gate. For christ sakes, IT'S MY FUCKING GATE! The same gate I've mocked and ridiculed for 3 years - IT'S MINE, not his. I just never really thought about it.
A few years ago, I offered to pay half the expense for some of the deteriorated lighting on one of the pillars. He declined my offer and said he'd take care of it. I figured, that's cool. In actuality, he was testing me to see what I knew about the potential gate ownership issue. These past 3 years he's been hoping I didn't know, didn't care or just didn't want to claim ownership of the gate. So he gradually assumed the role of "Gate Guardian." With the recent cataclysmic events, he must be running scared. He's probably wondering if the jig is up.
Now here's the deal. Our street is scheduled to be paved by mid-October. My guess is that he's waiting for the tree debacle and paving issues to conclude and then he'll resume the regular assholic gately protocol. I haven't decided what I'm going to do with my newfound knowledge. Personally, I'd never remove it. If it were up to me, I'd just leave it open all the time. I will tell you one thing though. If he puts his holiday wreath and Chirstmas lights on my gate, there will be fucking hell to pay. You have my word.
You might be asking yourself, "What if he reads this? What if he googles my name and this blog comes up? Saf, aren't you concerned about that?" C'mon, really. I would give neither two shits nor a flying fuck.

Monday, September 01, 2008


Yesterday was an interesting one. I did an airport run around noon. Picked up these two retired football coaches and zipped them down to Wheeling Island for the Don Nehlen Classic "Friends of Coal" event. One of the guys was Dick McPherson. The name sounded familiar but I just couldn't place what team he used to coach - this will eventually become slightly relevant. Anyway, I threw them in the back and off we went. Is it me, or does "The Friends of Coal" sound pretty lame? Couldn't they have configured a better motto; perhaps, "Coal Country" or "The Future is Coal" but really, "Friends of Coal?" I just don't like the idea of people befriending a black geological source of energy. Anyway, it was an uneventful ride to the hotel, with the exception of cops out EVERYWHERE. Of course it was Labor Day weekend, but this was ridiculous. Cops basically lined route 7 and littered parts of 22 and the Island. Between the hour ride up and back, I saw about 28 cruisers. No joke.
I NEVER discuss limo-oriented tips in an open forum, but the man I alluded to earlier emptied his entire wallet for my tip. "Hmmm, that's all I got." Three dollars. Later that night, his true identity would be revealed.
Onto round 2. I was supposed to take up a group from Washington, PA to Crue Fest (Motley Crue, Buckcherry, Papa Roach, 6am and Trapt) at Starlake. Just as I was preparing to leave, I get a call from Jenn D. "Eric would you be interested in letting someone ride co-pilot tonight?" Turns out Kelly Z. wanted to make the trek. This was one of the rare times I had an actual front seat on the passenger side so I acquiesced. Plus, I knew the crew I was taking wouldn't mind. Plus, how could anyone deny Kelly the rite of concert passage? It was nice to have company for a change. My usual limo has a plastic control panel where the seat is; thus, making it unsittable.
We made it to Washington at 6pm and picked up 4 fine looking women (Nichole, Gigi, Melanie and Jackie). Two were wild, two were tame. Kelly is wild and I am tame. So it provided a nice balance - 3 wild, 3 tame. So it was me and the 5 hotties - a refreshing change of pace. Took the back road (18 North) to Starlake. The place was pretty full when we arrived, no traffic. I'd say about 18,800 people showed up for this one. A few minutes after we parked in the oversized vehicle section, a massive military looking Hummer parked beside us. 25 guys in their early twenties jumped out of the back. They threw down a keg and a row of them just started pissing in a line-up. Kelly remarked about how one guy was taking a shit underneath the vehicle. This may or may not have happened. I honestly don't know. On the side of the military vehicle, in bold painted lettering, it read "FARM USE." I could already tell that trouble was brewing. These guys were pretty gooned up. I spoke briefly with this one guy wearing a blond wig and he said they lived about ten minutes down the road. Out of the twenty or so, none had tickets. Hmmmm, a bunch of testosterone fucks from the WV/PA border with no tickets and a ton of beer and liquor at a Motley Crue concert. Let's just say that Hurricane Gustav was en route.
We all hung out and enjoyed the sites and sounds. Ran into Scottie and Schneid as well. They'd be the recipients of two freebies compliments of our leader. One elderly blond-fried woman with an ill-fitting green tank top sat down to take a breather. She was trying to simultaneously fight with her husband, slam a beer and reposition her boobs. Another woman in a black leather mini-skirt took a brief piggyback ride atop the shoulders of her boyfriend. Her ass on total display as everyone cheered, jeered and some took photos. A group of girls walked by and engaged all of us. A few wandered next door into the piss fest. One of the girls boyfriend got into an argument with one of the testosterone fucks and ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE. Punches started flying and this one dude's nose was bent sideways, blood streaming all over the place. Simutaneously, there were 3 seperate outbreaks. A mob scene slammed into the side of the limo and crushed the side mirror. The lot attendants and parking guys called in for police back up, but that would take a while. Meanwhile, the brawl would continue unabated. Nichole looked at me, "Eric, do something!" I'm like, "Yeah, like what? Dive on top of the brawl? Try to preach Obama themes of peace and tolerance? What the fuck could I have done? I just silently observed and continued making keychains for the girls. Gigi remarked, "Eric, way to go with your knitting!" Well said. This fight seemed to last about 6 minutes. It had an inertia of its own so there wasn't any stopping it. Until the cops all rolled in. 4 cops and more golf cart security. When the pigs entered the fray, I missed a golden opportunity. As people scattered and some took off for the woods, I should have yelled, "PREPARE TO BE FUCKED BY THE LONG DICK OF THE LAW" (from the movie Superbad). That would have rocked the house. Would have.
I neglected to mention that 2 chicks were right in the middle of the brawl. A tattooed blond with a grey tank top was on top of the pile pummelling this one guy with what I'd call "fists of fury, UFC style." I think she was trying to help her boyfriend whose face was being driven into the gravel surface. All in all, they hauled off 4 of the guys. A few bloody faces and 2 broken noses, one severely. The cops interviewed me and I complained about the side mirror and the blood on the limo. They kept asking me who threw punches. I said, "Well, honestly it was a mob scene so it was hard to tell." In reality, the only one I clearly remember throwing punches was the one girl, but I couldn't rat her out. That would have been blatantly assholic. This had to be one of the biggest fights I've ever seen at Starlake. Big on quantity, duration and brutality. Actually, I've seen worse in the brutality department but this one was pretty heavy. From here on out, the fight will be known as Gustav. The fallout of Gustav - one more arrest for failure to obey/disorderly and a few girls crying. My crew went entirely unscathed. Gigi filled out a verbal police report of her own. All I could see was her repeating something to the effect of, "They're all a bunch of assholes." Probably not sustainable testimony in a court of law.
Buckcherry took the stage and we all wandered in. They had seats and we had lawn so we all kind of separated on the way in. Kelly seemed to enjoy the sights and sounds of Buckcherry. I did not. Some tattooed, high stepping freak singer screaming his tunes and talking at length about fucking and ball grabbing. As the final song Crazy Bitch closed out their set, we wandered down to the lower walkway and ran into Nichole and Gigi. They said it was pretty packed in the pavillion, so we opted to refrain fromt he "ticket hand-off sneak down." We ended up on the hill side with fellow limo driver Darryl. Kelly went to the restroom and got "lost" in the process. I took a look for her but didn't have any luck.
All in all, Motley Crue was pretty good. Tommy Lee pulled out the video "TIT E. CAM" and took a sampling of Breasts of Burgettstown. Mildy amusing. They sounded a bit rough. This was the final show of the North American tour and he was a little raspy. Keep in mind, they're all in their late 40's. And Mick Mars looked beyond hideous. The had to trenchcoat and tophat him. Basically, just cover up the entire guy in black so he blends into the background. Mick probably gets my vote for the ugliest rock star of all-time. All the Motorhead guys and even the lead singer of Grim Reaper are more visually appealing.
I left the show a little early and hooked up with Darryl. He informed me that Dick McPherson used to be the head coach of the New England Patriots. Fuck! A golden opportunity to rail on Bill Belicheck to someone with a pertinent opinion. Actually, I've always like Belicheck. Just don't tell anyone. Made it back to the limo and the military Hummer had just exited. Can't complain about that.
All in all, GREAT TIME. GREAT CREW. GOOD CRUE. I think there might be an unwritten chapter in this one. Well, at least I hope so. Time will tell.