4th restaurant review

All things considered, Ernie's Esquire is the absolute worst restaurant in Wheeling, WV. The building is fascinating - tons of obscure rooms and loads of character, but the food is excruciatingly atrocious. And of course, it's way overpriced. The only people that seem to dine there are little old ladies or people who "just plain don't know any better". I've been to a few wedding recpetions there and the food seemed to be much better. The only reasonable explanation I can offer is that these events weren't catered by Ernie's.
What's even funnier is that they have valet parking. This is borderline embarrasing. There simply should not be valet parking anywhere in Wheeling. I guess there are a few Wheeling bigwigs who think this is appropriate. They can pull up and toss their keys to some homely kid named Ethan and quickly get to their table (thus avoiding the hectic parking lot). First of all, the parking lot is always empty. Secodnly, the restaurant is always empty. Therefore, this comes down to an issue of prestige, not convenience. How sad. What's even worse is that poor Ethan probably doesn't get an hourly wage - probably just works for tips. So every time someone decides to park their own vehicle, they might get a glance of contempt or even worse, a look of utter despair.
As far as the service goes, I have no idea because I refuse eat there. I wouldn't even go there for happy hour, although I do kind of like the bar setup.
Anyway, if you want a better dining experience, I'd suggest Sudan - possibly something in the Darfur region.