#522. Let It Mo

I'm gonna copy and paste the following intro.  Why?  Because the title for these two parodies about U.S. Senate candidate Mo Brooks are identical.  

 

At CPAC last night in Dallas, U.S. Rep. Mo Brooks (R-AL) urged conservatives to “fight for America” like the colonial soldiers who endured a freezing winter at Valley Forge during the American Revolution.

“That’s the kind of sacrifice we have to think about,” he said.

This Senate-aspiring imbecile is doubling down on the Orange Prolapse's "fight narrative"... post-insurrection.

Both songs have wildly different musical styles.  One of them is the feature hit from the Disney Frozen soundtrack (2.5 billion views).  The other, a High'n'Dry rock anthem compliments of the British rock band Def Leppard (a mere 1.8 million views).

Since both songs have the exact same title, if you wish, feel free to change either to "He is Mo."  This will not offend me in the slightest.  But it's my personal opinion that "He is Mo" just lacks that lyrical punch.   Or if you will, panache.  "Let it Mo" sounds more poignant and triumphant.

Mark: 05:57

Let It Mo
sonofsaf

Hot Big Mac, large fries
You got me biggie-sized
Orange Prolapse, from a prism
Builds the wall and needs a fisting
He’s not ready, still news faking
His asshole’s god forsaking
Cinderella, yeah, shake me
And get ready for the big “T”

Suck his cock, yeah
Be a troll, be a
Let it Mo, let it Mo
You gotta suck his cock, cum on
Let it Mo, yeah fuck let it Mo

Orange clown, big con
Came in last, is so wrong
Burger’s cheesy, the big show
Sounds so crass, he’s Brooks Mo
It’s all for me, wanna stay
He’s believin’, he is gay
The orange clown’s a disease
Fuck Ivanka on her hands and knees

Suck his cock, yeah
Be a troll, be a
Let it Mo, let it Mo
You gotta suck his cock, cum on
Let it Mo, yeah fuck let it Mo

Let it Mo
Let it Mo
Let it Mo

Hot Big Mac, large fries
You got me biggie-sized
Orange clown, big con
Came in last, so wrong
Bill Cosby’s pudding, the pudding of blood
Punctured hymen
Obstetrician’s will haunt, they will haunt

Orange clown, big con
He came in last, and was so wrong
It’s a show, he is crass
Very cheesy, total ass
He’s the Mo

No, he’s not ready, still news faking
And his asshole is still shaking
Cinderella, yeah, shake me
And get ready for the big “T”

Suck his cock, suck it
Be a troll, be a
Let it Mo, let it
Suck it, suck his cock
Be a, be a troll
Let it, let it Mo
Let it Mo

Suck his cock, yeah
Be a troll, be a
Let it Mo, let it Mo
You gotta suck his cock, cum on
Be a troll, yeah
Let it Mo

 

Let It Go
Def Leppard

Cool woman, cool eyes, you got me hypnotized
So head down, get a rhythm
Stop your stalling and your bitching
I'm rock steady, I'm still shaking
I'm ready for the taking
So make your move, yeah, make me
And get ready for the big "C"

Let it rock, yeah
Let it roll, let it
Let it go, let it go
You gotta let it rock, come on
Let it roll, yeah just let it go

Slow down, hold on
You're too fast, you're too strong
Take it easy, take it slow
Make it last, don't let go
We're one body, it's one way
You're not leaving, c'mon stay
So get down on your knees
And let me know you're eager to please

Let it rock, yeah
Let it roll, let it
Let it go, let it go
You gotta let it rock, come on
Let it roll, yeah just let it go

Let it go
Let it go
Let it go

Cool woman, cool eyes
You got me hypnotized
Slow down, hold on
You're too fast, too strong
I need a woman, a woman to love
One good woman
And you got what I want, what I want

Slow down, hold on
You're much too fast, you're much too strong
Take it slow, make it last
Take it easy, not too fast
Don't let go

No, I'm rock steady, but still shaking
And I'm ready for the taking
So make your move, yeah make me
And get a-ready for the big "C", yeah

Let it rock, let it
Let it roll, let it
Let it go, let it
Let it, let it rock
Let it, let it roll
Let it, let it go
Let it go

Let it rock, yeah
Let it roll, let it
Let it go, let it go
You gotta let it rock, come on
Let it roll, yeah
Let it go

Def Leppard:

8-6-88, Buckeye Lake Music Center, Newark, OH

8-12-00, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

7-10-09, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

8-24-14, First Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

7-8-16, First Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

I remember my brother's musical buddies from Oberlin College crashing at our house one night over the summer of 1988.  Other than their collective inclination for taking repeated walks outside in the evening (obviously smoking grass), one of guys laughed hysterically when I told them I was a big Def Leppard fan.  He was like... "who ever heard of a drummer with only one arm?  That's like a chef without a tongue."

On October 2, 1988, everyone and their grandmother went to see Def Leppard at the Wheeling Civic Center on the wildly popular Hysteria tour.  I missed the concert as I happened to be living in Dayton, OH at the time.

Please do not share this material with Congressman Mo Brooks (R-AL) and/or former President Donald J. Trump.

#521. Took A Big Fall

Yesterday, President Biden terminated Trump appointee Andrew Saul.  He was Commissioner of the Social Security Administration.  Truth be told, I'd never heard of this fucko until 10 seconds ago.  But good riddance.  So long you Jew bastard.

Seems a bit perplexed.  

As if nobody told him that the entire purpose of social security… is to protect economically vulnerable senior citizens.
 

 

Took A Big Fall
sonofsaf

Saul, Saul, you took a big fall
Like a Friday night massacre for yinz all
Stick it up your ass, try not to bawl
You took a big fall

Better Call Saul
Junior Brown

Saul, Saul, you better call Saul
He'll fight for your rights when your back's to the wall
Stick it to the man, justice for all
You better call Saul

 

Even though the HBO series comes highly recommended by the Super Genius Mark Madden, I've never watched an episode.  Tried one time but just "couldn't get into it."  One of these days I'll likely give it another shot.  An HBO drama about a shyster seems unusually emblematic in the era of Rudy Giuliani, Sidney Powell, and all of the other Orange Prolapse attorneys.

Please do not share this material with Andrew Saul, President Joe Biden, and/or former President Donald J. Trump.

#520. The Big Lie

The big lie...
 

 

 

Brought to you by the Atomic Tropicana.

Takeaway:  I'd sooner trust a dead prince as opposed to a living Orange Prolapse.

 

The Big Lie
sonofsaf

Fuck if you will J. Kushner
And the Orange Prolapse takin’ a shit
His colon exposed for all to see
Can you Tom Cotton
Could he get his wish?

Scream, like you do, a retard
Your heroes the Temple of Doom
Donald Trump’s like acid and doses
He has some teats
The teats of Stormy will do

How does he keep the flames fanning?
Tweeting to the Trumpers is so bold (so bold)
Maybe he’s not from King’s Landing
Maybe he’s just like a squirter, too wet
Maybe he’s just like a flirter
His chicken’s always fried (his chicken’s always fried)
Just a wet dream or another
This is why Proud Boys fight
The big lie

Fuck if you will Ivanka
She does resemble a fry
His dumbshit children are so fucked up
More like a bad zoo
Took you for a ride

How does he keep the flames fanning?
Tweeting to the Trumpers so bold (Trumpers so bold)
Maybe he’s not from King’s Landing
Maybe he’s just like a squirter, too wet
Maybe he’s just like a flirter
His chicken’s always fried (his chicken’s always fried)
Just a wet dream or another
This is why Proud Boys fight
The big lie

How does he keep the flames fanning?
Tweeting to the Trumpers is so bold (the Trumpers are so bold)
Maybe he’s not from King’s Landing (maybe, maybe he’s like a squirter)
Maybe he’s just like a squirter too bold (you know he's too bold)
Maybe he’s just like a flirter (maybe he’s just like a flirter)
His chicken’s always fried (she's never, never satisfied)
Just a wet dream or another (just a wet dream, just)
This is why Proud Boys fight
The big lie
The big lie (big lie, big lie)
The big lie (big lie, big lie)

Don't lie (don't lie)

 

When Doves Cry
Prince

Dig if you will the picture
Of you and I engaged in a kiss
The sweat of your body covers me
Can you my darling
Can you picture this?

Dream, if you can, a courtyard
An ocean of violets in bloom
Animals strike curious poses
They feel the heat
The heat between me and you

How can you just leave me standing
Alone in a world that's so cold? (So cold)
Maybe I'm just too demanding
Maybe I'm just like my father, too bold
Maybe you're just like my mother
She's never satisfied (she's never satisfied)
Why do we scream at each other?
This is what it sounds like
When doves cry

Touch if you will my stomach
Feel how it trembles inside
You've got the butterflies all tied up
Don't make me chase you
Even doves have pride

How could you just leave me standing
Alone in a world so cold? (World so cold)
Maybe I'm just too demanding
Maybe I'm just like my father, too bold
Maybe you're just like my mother
She's never satisfied (she's never satisfied)
Why do we scream at each other?
This is what it sounds like
When doves cry

How can you just leave me standing
Alone in a world that's so cold? (A world that's so cold)
Maybe I'm just too demanding (maybe, maybe I'm like my father)
Maybe I'm just like my father too bold (you know he's too bold)
Maybe you're just like my mother (maybe you're just like my mother)
She's never satisfied (she's never, never satisfied)
Why do we scream at each other? (Why do we scream, why)
This is what it sounds like
When doves cry
When doves cry (doves cry, doves cry)
When doves cry (doves cry, doves cry)

Don't cry (don't cry)

 

 

Prince:

9-20-97, Civic Arena, Pittsburgh, PA (Unusually disappointing.  Prince was in his Jehovah's Witness phase.)

4-14-04, Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, PA (One of my all-time favorite concerts.)

Worth a listen.  Prince. (From 2004, Los Angeles, CA.)

Please do not share this material with former President Donald J. Trump.

#519. Super Spreader Of The Fake News

Newly implemented voting restrictions across the United States continue unabated.  

All of it... courtesy of the Big Lie.  

 

What's really scary is how all of these aspiring Republican politicians are following the Orange Prolapse's lead.  They embrace Jim Crow like it's a badge of honor.  In particular, nearby U.S. Senate candidate Sean Parnell (R-PA).  

Sean Parnell

@SeanParnellUSA

The law Fetterman is pushing would divert taxpayer dollars to his campaign, gut voter ID, make ballot harvesting legal, & make it harder to remove people from voter rolls. All of which is unpopular, radical & deeply undemocratic.  The rest of his tweet is just histrionic nonsense.

 

John Fetterman

@JohnFetterman

The Supreme Court just gave voter suppression the green light. This is deeply undemocratic. If I were in the Senate, I would proudly cast the 51st vote to abolish the filibuster and pass the For the People Act and the John Lewis Voting Rights Act.

Nothing is being done to disguise the GOP voter suppression these days.  All of it in keeping with the Trumpian mantra of taking tremendous pride in corruption, stupidity and illegality.

Super Spreader Of The Fake News
sonofsaf

Put you in a trance
You might as well have died
There’s too many chances
The Orange Prolapse lied

‘Cause he embodies the seven sins
His mouth eats Big Mac shit for din
Just another chance
Let him tweet and start up a fight

He’s the fake news
Yeah, the fake news
He’s the fake news
Super spreader of the fake news, yeah

Puts you in a trance
He’s still waitin’ to be king
Gotta refinance
He cries when there’s no fried chicken

Gonna be, wild, o say can you see
Jared Kushner’s on his hands and knees
So sick of this trance
You'd hide his booger nose pickins

He’s the fake news
Yeah, the fake news
He’s the fake news
Super spreader of the fake news, wild

Free speech is why so many die
The First Amendment brings the fight
Oh now
Oh, yeah

I’m not dumb
You’re a liar
You’re a liar
You are a liar
You are a liar

He’s the fake news
Yeah, the fake news
He’s the fake news
Super spreader of the fake news

Super spreader of the fake news
Super spreader of the fake news

 

Even Better than the Real Thing
U2

Give me one more chance
And you'll be satisfied
Give me two more chances
You won't be denied

Well, my heart is where it's always been
My head is somewhere in between
Give me one more chance
Let me be your lover tonight

You're the real thing
Yeah, the real thing
You're the real thing
Even better than the real thing, yeah

Give me one last chance
And I'm gonna make you sing
Give me half a chance
To ride on the waves that you bring

You're honey, child, to a swarm of bees
Gonna blow right through you like a breeze
Give me one last dance
We'll slide down the surface of things

You're the real thing
Yeah, the real thing
You're the real thing
Even better than the real thing, child

We're free to fly the crimson sky
The sun won't melt our wings tonight
Oh now
Oh, yeah

Here she comes
Take me higher
Take me higher
You take me higher
You take me higher

You're the real thing
Yeah, you're the real thing
You're the real thing
Even better than the real thing

Even better than the real thing
Even better than the real thing

U2:

5-22-97, Three Rivers Stadium, Pittsburgh, PA

5-6-01, Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, PA

7-26-11, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA

6-17-17, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA

This song's a great opener.  If you're a bootleg aficionado, there's a slew of U2 "IEM" (inner ear mic) live recordings on the internet.  Definitely worth a listen.  They all have this "audio metronome numerical countdown" distinction.  Gives you a fuckin' bono.

Please do not share this material with former President Donald J. Trump and/or Pennsylvania U.S. Senate candidate Sean Parnell.

#518. Orange Clown

Saf, it's my understanding that you hate Trump.  So concerning your whole 1,000 parodies in a year objective... how come you don't write songs about Donald McDump?  

Truth be told, I've composed a slew of parodies regarding the Orange Prolapse.  But they were written a couple years ago.  All of them featured in the context of my two "off, off" Broadway musicals.  Bat Boy Bites Back and Bigfoot Stomps.

But after watching Trump host that press conference at his golf club in Bedminster, NJ (he's suing Facebook & Twitter, Zuckerberg & Dorsey for alleged First Amendment violations), it's time to step back up to the plate.  Or in this case, hit the drive thru at McDonald's.

Funny thing.  Facebook and Twitter have the ultimate excuse for banning Trump.  But they just can't come out and say it.  So I will.  Social media is afraid that Trump will utilize their platforms to indiscriminately kill and maim innocent human beings.  

Ten years ago, during the previous Obama administration, I created a website which explained all this stuff in excruciating detail.  But when the shit hit the fan on 1-6, the media just used alternative descriptions and definitions (attempted coup, riot, insurrection, domestic terrorism, etc.).  

Hmm, maybe if history repeats itself, they'll finally come around and identify if it for what it really is... an "artificially generated stampede," or worst case scenario, dominipede.  My hunch is they'll eventually get it right.  But only if it's the latter.  Warning: such a delay does not bode well for mankind.  

If you weren't aware, acts of terrorism and warfare without conventional weaponry is some really ugly, slime ball shit.

 

Orange Clown
sonofsaf

He always wanted to be fucking you
He takes it up the ass for d... p. too
You know he licks the bathroom stall
The fake news lied about it all

Orange Clown you’re shitting from your ass
Orange Clown you have disgusting gas
Orange Clown you’ve got an ugly face
Orange Clown you know this is the case

Mike Pence will screw me I cannot depend
His wife’s his mother much to his defense
We’re gonna have to turn the page
The Orange Prolapse is filled with rage

Orange Clown you’re shitting from your ass
Orange Clown you have disgusting gas
Orange Clown you’ve got an ugly face
Orange Clown you know this is the case

Trump is a bozo and a fucking pain
People are praying filled with great disdain
Oh Stormy Daniels didn’t cum
Maybe Trump’s queer with tan so bronze

Orange Clown you’re shitting from your ass
Orange Clown you have disgusting gas
Orange Clown you’ve got an ugly face
Orange Clown you know this is the case

 

Slow Down
Ozzy Osbourne

I'll never bother keeping up with you
Burning the candle at both ends it's true
You know the writings on the wall
Why do you ride to take a fall

Slow down your moving way to fast
Slow down you know you'll never last
Slow down your haste is making waste
Slow down and join the human race

I tried to tell you time and time again
You know you'll have to pay the consequence
Now your obsessed with such a pace
But slow and steady wins the race

Slow down your moving way to fast
Slow down you know you'll never last
Slow down your haste is making waste
Slow down and join the human race

You seem to run around and round in vain
People are saying that you've gone insane
Tell me just what you're running from
One day you're here and the next you're gone

Slow down you're moving way to fast
Slow down you know you'll never last
Slow down your haste is making waste
Slow down and join the human race

 

Saf, what's the best Ozzy album?  

Gotta go with Bark at the Moon.  No filler whatsoever.  In direct contrast to his last release "Ordinary Man" --- great title track and video.  But then every other song is absolutely abysmal, atrocious, etc.  In short, the Ozzman sucketh.

Please do not share this material with former President Donald J. Trump.

#517. Mo

This is my 4th fucking parody of Alabama Congressman Mo Brooks.  Damn, how time flies!  

Count 'em up.  One, two, three, whore. 

Brooks That Kill - Looks that Kill (Motley Crue)

Everyday I Fight Mo Brooks - Everyday I Write The Book (Elvis Costello)

They Hate Mo - I Don't Know (Ozzy Osbourne)

and now, my shortest title to date... Mo - Low (Cracker)

Considering his prominent role in the 1-6 domestic terrorist attack on the Capitol, I'll probably write a few more.  After all, lots of shit rhymes with "Mo"... you know?

"It's time to start taking down names and kicking ass."

Keep in mind, this imbecile is running for the United States Senate.  Not the House.  

But he's a diehard Trumper from deep red Alabama.  So I guess that gives him more of a pass.

We'll dedicate this one to a "Mo" of a different sort.  Wheeling's very own G Mo.

 

Mark: 1:03:59

 

Mo
sonofsaf

Some people think that Trump’s a clown
Some people like to watch the show
Civil unrest is unwise
Last name’s Brooks his first name is Mo

Some people know that Mo likes the meat
Enjoys it straight up his ass
And all the while Big Mac’s a treat
And all the while, and all the while

I'll fuck you up world
My name is Mo
Hey, hey, hey stooges are cloned
I'll fuck you up world
My name is Mo
Hey, hey, hey stooges are cloned

The Orange Prolapse gonna make you weep
Tortures children just the same
The Jews drink Manischewitz wine
That Jew Ivanka’s on her knees

Hey Trump’s a syndrome of the down
Like some yinzer jagging off
And all the while Big Mac’s a treat
And all the while, and all the while

I'll fuck you up world
My name is Mo
Hey, hey, hey stooges are cloned
I'll fuck you up world
My name is Mo
Hey, hey, hey stooges are cloned

Jew Jew is not fun
Clown clown don’t ask why
Mean mean makes kids cry
And all the while and all the while

Hey hey Trump’s a syndrome of the down
Like some dick that’s jagging off
And all the while Big Mac’s a treat
And all the while, and all the while

I'll fuck you up world
My name is Mo
Hey, hey, hey stooges are cloned
I'll fuck you up world
My name is Mo
Hey, hey, hey stooges are cloned

I'll fuck you up world
My name is Mo
Hey, hey, hey stooges are cloned
I'll fuck you up world
My name is Mo
Hey, hey, hey stooges are cloned

 

Low
Cracker

Sometimes I want to take you down
Sometimes I want to get you low
Brush your hair back from your eyes
Take you down let the river flow

Sometimes I go and walk the street
Behind the green sheet of glass
A million miles below their feet
A million miles, a million miles

I'll be with you girl
Like being low
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned
I'll be with you girl
Like being low
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned

A million poppies gonna make me sleep
Just one rose and knows your name
The fruit is rusting on the vine
The fruit is calling from the trees

Hey don't you want to go down
Like some junkie cosmonaut
A million miles below their feet
A million miles, a million miles

I'll be with you girl
Like being low
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned
I'll be with you girl
Like being low
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned

Blue blue is the sun
Brown brown is the sky
Green green of her eyes
A million miles a million miles

Hey hey don't you want to go down
Like some disgraced cosmonaut
A million miles below their feet
A million miles, a million miles

I'll be with you girl
Like being low
Hey hey hey like being stoned
I'll be with you girl
Like being low
Hey hey hey like being stoned

I'll be with you girl
Like being low
Hey hey hey like being stoned
I'll be with you girl
Like being low
Hey hey hey like being stoned 

Cracker:

5-8-94: Metropol, Pittsburgh, PA (only saw the mid-afternoon soundcheck while the Sleeping Giants were filming a "music video" next door at Rosebud's).  Take Me Down to the Infirmary and Sweet Potato.

Considering the number of times that Cracker has come to the Burgh (18), kind of a shocker that I've only seen them once.  Definitely one of the more better hippie rock bands of the 90's still floating around.  

Please do not share this material with Congressman Mo Brooks (R-AL) and any of his other co-conspirators (Trump, Giuliani, Donald Dump Jr., The My Pillow Fuck, etc.) who collectively share the burden for creating and unleashing the most notorious artificially generated stampede in the history of the United States.

#516. Delta Con

The Covid "Delta" variant is all the rage these days.  You see, Fox News is now warning everyone about how the Democrats have successfully weaponized the variant.  Thereby terrifying the public at-large.  Scare us into big healthcare spending (socialism).  Not only that, but the Dems want to close down restaurants again.  If the renewed shut down is successful, overweight Fox News junkies won't be able to stuff their face with General Tso's chicken.  Oh, the lockdown humanity.

In other news, Fox Business analysts think it's a good time to short stock in Delta Airlines.  Because, well, everyone knows that you stand a more significant chance of contracting the China virus by flying on Delta.  Their new corporate motto was leaked... "You fly with us, you die with us."

 

Delta Con
sonofsaf

Delta con, is that Fox News you got on
It’s all of those evening shows that don’t ask why
LGBT is gay but Q-Anon is here to stay
It makes me wanna hide my eyes and cry

Fauci is scum says Donald Trump and the CDC
All the libs around D.C. think he’s crazy
'Cause Orange Prolapse clown is a fuckface that needs banned
Electing a non virtuous orange haired man

Ransom ware it pays it’s called the Delta con
Ugliest virus some call it a black swan
But the vaccine is for free and that’s no lie
And Donald Trump we hoped that he would die

Delta con, is that Fox News you got on
It’s all of those evening shows that don’t ask why
LGBT is gay but Q-Anon is here to stay
It makes me wanna hide my eyes and cry

Delta con, is that Fox News you got on
It’s all of those evening shows that don’t ask why
LGBT is gay but Q-Anon is here to stay
It makes me wanna hide my eyes and cry

Delta con, is that Fox News you got on
It’s all of those evening shows that don’t ask why
LGBT is gay but Q-Anon is here to stay
It makes me wanna hide my eyes and cry

Delta con, is that Fox News you got on
It’s all of those evening shows that don’t ask why
LGBT is gay but Q-Anon is here to stay
It makes me wanna hide my eyes and cry

 

Delta Dawn
Tanya Tucker

Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on
Could it be a faded rose from days gone by?
And did I hear you say he was a-meeting you here today
To take you to his mansion in the sky?

She's forty-one and her daddy still calls her, 'baby'
All the folks around Brownsville say she's crazy
'Cause she walks down town with a suitcase in her hand
Looking for a mysterious dark-haired man

In her younger days they called her Delta Dawn
Prettiest woman you ever laid eyes on
Then a man of low degree stood by her side
And promised her he'd take her for his bride

Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on
Could it be a faded rose from days gone by?
And did I hear you say he was a-meeting you here today
To take you to his mansion in the sky?

Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on
Could it be a faded rose from days gone by?
And did I hear you say he was a-meeting you here today
To take you to his mansion in the sky?

Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on
Could it be a faded rose from days gone by?
And did I hear you say he was a-meeting you here today
To take you to his mansion in the sky?

Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on
Could it be a faded rose from days gone by?
And did I hear you say he was a-meeting you here today
To take you to his mansion in the sky?

So have I ever seen Tanya Tucker perform live in concert?  Good question.  I'm honestly not sure.  I imagine at one point or another she has showed up at Jamboree in the Hills in Morristown, Ohio.  And I've been to a ton of those Super Bowl Cunt Tree extravaganzas.  As an employee and as a drunken imbecile.  Sometimes both simultaneously.

Please do not share this material with Tanya Tucker and/or anyone who has contracted the Covid Delta variant.

#515. Fuck The Leech

I'll make a political prediction.  Looks like Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is currently in the driver's seat ahead of the 2024 presidential election.  There are the others: Mike Pompeo, Ted Cruz, Nikki Haley who've got an outside shot.  Then there's a lengthier list of Republican douchebags (Rand Paul, Lindsey Graham, Josh Hawley, Tom Cotton, etc.) who've got no chance whatsoever.  They just want a seat at the table.  Raise money, go on Fox News, sell books.

Republicans have a long history of nominating governors.  Executive over legislative.  Less of a track record on difficult and polarizing issues.  Less insider, swampy establishment.  Greater level of independence.  But who would DeSantis pick for his VP?  

I'm virtually certain he'd pick a woman.  And that woman would likely be a dark horse governor who goes by the name Kristi Noem (R-SD).  It'd make for a pretty even race.  I suspect she'll take a page out of the Kamala Harris playbook.  Announce her candidacy and hit the debate stage.  Get in some shots, raise her profile, and then discreetly bow out.

DeSantis/Noem vs. Harris/uncertain (Likely a white male Democratic governor from a red state.  Kentucky's Andy Beshear comes to mind).  This is all assuming Biden bows out.

Dedicated to Kristi Noem.  What an attractive, predictable leech.  Definitely a right wing, tea bagging, loud mouth braggart, faux-patriot type.  She just sent another 125 South Dakota members of the National Guard to the border.  She could probably get away with being labeled a "female Trump."  But without the stigma that cums with being overly close to the Orange Prolapse.  She'd make for a good fit. 

Fuck The Leech
sonofsaf

South Dakota
Noem…
Noem…
Noem…

 

Up The Beach
Jane’s Addiction

Here we go now
Home...
Home...
Home... 

Jane’s Addiction:

5-7-91, A.J. Palumbo Center, Pittsburgh, PA *
7-19-03, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA (Lollapalooza)
7-10-15, Stage AE, Pittsburgh, PA

Porno for Pyros:

8-20-93, I.C. Light Amphitheatre, Pittsburgh, PA

* One of my all-time favorite concerts.  

Please do not share this material with Governor Kristi Noem (R-SD).  Mindless sonofsaf trivia:  My first parody in the quest for 1,000 was about Noem.  Noem Sweet Noem.

#514. J.D. Vance For Me

Regarding my "integrity assessment" of Hillbilly Elegy author J.D. Vance, I was entirely mistaken.  I got it all wrong.  Turns out he's just another Trumper bitch.

I thought he was going to refrain from kissing the ring of the Orange Prolapse.  And be the only non-sycophant in the crowded Republican field for Ohio Senate.

But now he's engaging in his own brand of revisionist history and deleting his disparaging past tweets about the McDonald's Clown.

 Figures. 

 

 

J.D. Vance For Me
sonofsaf

If you’re in a bind
It’s always the time
Show me the money
J.D. Vance for me
If you let Trump, fuck you so
Maybe you’re the clown
And you know his wife’s a ho
As you’re going down

If you're from Cleveland
Cincinnati or Dayton
Even Bell-Dirty
J.D. Vance for thee
Stormy had a big ass chest
And got paid off why
If he beats all the rest
Maybe Trump will die

J.D. Vance for me
All I want’s some of your money
J.D. Vance for me

You will be sucking (oh)
You will be fucking (yeah)
His dong hates the cold weather (dong hates the cold weather)
Hair that’s very pubic (oh)
Asshole wants cock-in (yeah)
Anal since I met her (anal since I met her)

'Cause he has a cock
He’s gonna try to fuck you
Gonna stick it up your ass too, it's tragic
He shows no remorse or care
It’s a game of truth or dare, I think you should blow
And cum watch it grow

If you’re in a bind
It’s always the time
Show me the money
J.D. Vance for me
If you let Trump, fuck you so
Maybe you’re the clown
And you know his wife’s a ho
As you’re going down

If you're from Cleveland
Cincinnati or Dayton
Even Bell-Dirty
J.D. Vance for me
Stormy had a big ass chest
And got paid off why
If I beat all the rest
Maybe Trump will die

J.D. Vance for me
Dream on, the news is fake, fuck you
J.D. Vance for me

Oh, you should vote your mind, maybe (oh)
I would not worry (yeah)
At least he’s not a Jew (at least he’s not a Jew)
He is very Trumpy (oh)
Favor, he’ll curry (yeah)
Gonna adVance on you (gonna adVance on you)

He’ll adVance and how
When he will call their bluff
Unless the sex gets rough, it's tragic
Stormy Daniels ain’t a crime
But Michael Cohen did some time, yes, he was a rat
Trump is great n’at

If you’re in a bind
It’s always the time
Show me the money
J.D. Vance for me
If you let Trump, fuck you so
Maybe you’re the clown
And you know his wife’s a ho
As you’re going down

If you're from Cleveland
Cincinnati or Dayton
Even Bell-Dirty
J.D. Vance for thee
Stormy had a big ass chest
Daniels fake titties
If he beats all the rest
J.D. Vance for me
J.D. Vance, J.D. Vance, J.D. Vance for me

Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba
Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba
Show me the money
J.D. Vance for me
Stormy had a big ass chest
Daniels fake titties
If he beats all the rest
J.D. Vance for me
J.D. Vance, J.D. Vance, J.D. Vance for me

Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba
Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba, ba-ba
Show me the money
J.D. Vance for me
Stormy had a big ass chest
Daniels fake titties
If he beats all the rest
J.D. Vance for me

 

Take A Chance On Me
ABBA

If you change your mind
I'm the first in line
Honey, I'm still free
Take a chance on me
If you need me, let me know
Gonna be around
If you've got no place to go
When you're feeling down

If you're all alone
When the pretty birds have flown
Honey, I'm still free
Take a chance on me
Gonna do my very best
And it ain't no lie
If you put me to the test
If you let me try

Take a chance on me
That's all I ask of you, honey
Take a chance on me

We can go dancing (oh)
We can go walking (yeah)
As long as we're together (long as we're together)
Listen to some music (oh)
Maybe just talking (yeah)
Get to know you better (get to know you better)

'Cause you know I've got
So much that I wanna do
When I dream I'm alone with you, it's magic
You want me to leave it there
Afraid of a love affair, but I think you know
That I can't let go

If you change your mind
I'm the first in line
Honey, I'm still free
Take a chance on me
If you need me, let me know
Gonna be around
If you've got no place to go
When you're feeling down

If you're all alone
When the pretty birds have flown
Honey, I'm still free
Take a chance on me
Gonna do my very best
And it ain't no lie
If you put me to the test
If you let me try

Take a chance on me
Come on, give me a break, will you?
Take a chance on me

Oh, you can take your time, baby (oh)
I'm in no hurry (yeah)
Know I'm gonna get you (know I'm gonna get you)
You don't wanna hurt me (oh)
Baby, don't worry (yeah)
I ain't gonna let you (I ain't gonna let you)

Let me tell you now
My love is strong enough
To last when things are rough, it's magic
You say that I waste my time
But I can't get you off my mind, no, I can't let go
'Cause I love you so

If you change your mind
I'm the first in line
Honey, I'm still free
Take a chance on me
If you need me, let me know
Gonna be around
If you've got no place to go
If you're feeling down

If you're all alone
When the pretty birds have flown
Honey, I'm still free
Take a chance on me
Gonna do my very best
Baby, can't you see?
Gotta put me to the test
Take a chance on me
Take a chance, take a chance, take a chance on me

Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba
Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba
Honey, I'm still free
Take a chance on me
Gonna do my very best
Baby, can't you see
Gotta put me to the test
Take a chance on me
Take a chance, take a chance, take a chance on me

Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba
Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba, ba-ba
Honey, I'm still free
Take a chance on me
Gonna do my very best
Baby, can't you see
Gotta put me to the test
Take a chance on me 

The original ABBA never played in Pittsburgh.  They might be the quintessential palindrome, but as far as music goes, just not really my cup of tea. 

However, I did like the Andy Bernard acapella version of "Take A Chance On Me" when he asks out Angela with the assistance of "Here Comes Treble."  Surprisingly, it's not available on yinz fallopian tubes.

Please do not share this material with Ohio Senate candidate J.D. Vance and/or former President Donald J. Trump.

#513. Fuck Max

Trump's hand picked candidate to try and primary Congressman Anthony Gonzalez (R-OH) is his former White House staffer, Max Miller.  Gonzalez raised the ire of the Orange Prolapse when he voted in favor of a Congressional investigation into the 1-6 domestic terrorist attack on U.S. Capitol.

Miller was also the deputy campaign manager for the failed Trump 2020 reelection campaign.  Miller's a sycophantic Jew with a bad track record.  Multiple arrests (assault, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct).  He also pretended to be a Marine recruiter which is a pretty serious violation of federal law.   All that being said, he recently raised 550K in donations.  So that makes him an instantly viable contender.

Fuck Max
sonofsaf

Ma-a-x
He needs a bathroom and how
Well, whoa, well

Fuck Max, he’s the shit
Way down deep in a toilet
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
And he’s got the runs
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
He has a cock you blew it
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
And he’s got the runs
And he’s got the runs

Fuck Max, he’s the shit
Way down deep in a toilet
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
And he’s got the runs
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
He has a cock you blew it
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
And he’s got the runs
Runs
Whoa-oh-oh

It's gonna be a tough election
Stop faking your damn erection
Make those memes
Dream wet dreams
Gonna fuck me (fuck me)
Fuck me (fuck me)
Fuck me use some anal cream
Anal cream

Fuck Max
He’s the shit
Fuck Max
And he’s got the runs (runs)

He’s shitting
He’s shitting (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

Fuck Max (he’s the shit)
Way down deep in the toilet (t.p. for me)
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
And he’s got the runs
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
He has a cock you blew it
Fuck Max, he’s the shit (ass)

And he’s got the runs
And he’s got the runs
And he’s got the runs
Runs

Fuck it up
There will be blood
In your shit

Fuck Max, he’s the shit
Way down deep in the toilet
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
Fuck Max, he’s the shit
He has a cock you blew it
Fuck Max, he’s the shit

Showtime, showtime, showtime (hey!)
Runs!

 

Relax
Frankie Goes To Hollywood

Mi-i-n-e
Give it to me one time now
Well, whoa, well

Relax, don't do it
When you wanna go do it
Relax, don't do it
When you wanna come
Relax, don't do it
When you wanna suck, chew it
Relax, don't do it
When you wanna come
When you wanna come

Relax, don't do it
When you wana go to it
Relax, don't do it
When you want to come
Relax, don't do it
When you want to suck, chew it
Relax, don't do it
When you want to come
Come
Whoa-oh-oh

But shoot it in the right direction
Make making it your intention
Live those dreams
Scheme those schemes
Got to hit me (hit me)
Hit me (hit me)
Hit me with those laser beams
Laser beam

Relax
Don't do it
Relax
When you wanna come (come)

I'm coming
I'm coming (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

Relax (don't do it)
When you wanna go to it (what's inside me?)
Relax, don't do it
When you want to come
Relax, don't do it
When you want to suck, chew it
Relax, don't do it (love!)

When you wanna come
When you wanna come
When you wanna come
Come

Get it up
The scene of love
Oh feel it

Relax, don't do it
When you wanna go do it
Relax, don't do it
Relax, don't do it
When you want to suck, chew it
Relax, don't do it

One time, one time, one time (hey!)
Come!

Frankie might have came in Hollywood.  But Frankie has never come to the Burgh.  Cum!

I remember when the song Relax came out in 1983.  Ironically right around the same time I discovered the art of masturbation.  So naturally the song spoke to me.

In all honesty, my reaction was more like "what in the fucking name of Christ?"  How is MTV allowed to play this stuff?  Especially with all the repetitive "cum" references.  Not to mention the entire golden shower splashing noise sequence.  Where's the P.M.R.C.?  Where's Tipper Gore?  Oh yeah, she has an axe to grind, if and only if, it's heavy metal.

I mean, yeah, I know they're from England and all.  Where social mores are a tad more lenient.  But WTF?!?   And what's up with all these gyrating mustache dudes in leather bondage gear? 

One helluva catchy tune though.

Keep in mind, these are the impressions of a 13 year old Jew from Wheeling, WV.

Please do not share this material with Congressional Candidate Max Miller (R-OH).

#512. You're A Jew (Better Run And Hide)

There's a rumor circulating on the internet.  No joke.

After years of steadfast service, Jared Kushner and Ivanka are now deliberately distancing themselves from dear old dad.  They both want off the Donald Express.  Sounds hard to believe but neither of them are on board with the stop the steal/insurrection/dead cops/destroy democracy narrative.

 

Alas, this has infuriated the Orange Prolapse to the point of bulging, fluorescent exposure.  Yuk.

Trumpy Bear (not to be confused with Russian hacking group Cozy Bear) even channeled that inner rage and penned a parody.  I'll be damned.  He's currently mulling whether to sing it at an upcoming rally or debut the song on pay per view for his most loyal supporters (members of the prestigious Trump Honor Roll).  

Who could've predicted the Trump/Kushner fallout?  I guess the answer is... me. 

 

You’re A Jew (Better Run and Hide)
sonofsaf

You know the Orange Prolapse is white
White and fucking gay
He is scum
He has lied
You’re a Jew better run and hide
You’re a Jew better run and hide
You’re a Jew better run and hide, yeah

He licked her asshole queer
Fucked her in the rear
But with a cock comes balls
He's got no pride
You’re a Jew better run and hide
You’re a Jew better run and hide

Yeah
C'mon, yeah

Everybody loves Ivanka
Everybody loves Ivanka
Not a lie
Not a lie
Not a lie
Not a lie, yeah

You stole Ivanka from my arms
Eat between her thighs
You lick her puss
Start to cry
You’re a Jew better run and hide
You’re a Jew better run and hide
You’re a Jew, ow
Oh, yeah

I am mean
You are weak
Go and pray
Jewish coward
You masturbate
More than twice
You’re a Jew better run and hide
You’re a Jew better run and hide
You’re a Jew
You’re a Jew
You’re a Jew
You’re a Jew
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Break on Through (To The Other Side)
The Doors

You know the day destroys the night
Night divides the day
Tried to run
Tried to hide
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side, yeah

We chased our pleasures here
Dug our treasures there
But can you still recall
The time we cried
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side

Yeah
C'mon, yeah

Everybody loves my baby
Everybody loves my baby
She get high
She get high
She get high
She get high, yeah

I found an island in your arms
Country in your eyes
Arms that chain us
Eyes that lie
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side
Break on through, ow
Oh, yeah

Made the scene
Week to week
Day to day
Hour to hour
The gate is straight
Deep and wide
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side
Break on through
Break on through
Break on through
Break on through
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Never saw The Doors.  However, I did enjoy the movie.  Amazing how they made Val Kilmer look so much like Jim Morrison.  Even better than the Daniel Day Lewis resemblance of Abraham Lincoln.  On second thought, that one's a toss-up.

Through the years, I've been told I look similar to younger Jeff Goldblume.  

Even though he's 68 years old, I guess that's who'd play me in the event of a dominipede.  Hey, he was born right down the road in West Homestead.  So it seems like a match made in heaven... or perhaps hell.  Maybe he could portray me in my later years.  You know, when I'm chained to a basement wall in a CIA dark site in the former Yugoslavia.

Please do not share this information with Jared Kushner and/or former President Donald J. Trump.

#511. Savage Taliban

President Biden announced a "complete" withdrawal from Afghanistan.  So naturally, every Republican is now going to blame Joe for every last shooting, every last bombing, every rape, every murder.  He'll own all of it.  Basically, anything bad that happens in Afghanistan from here on out will be entirely his fault.  And the fault of radical Democrats who have this curious disdain for American soldiers who were critically injured or made the ultimate sacrifice.  Part of the "I just don't understand why the Democrats hate our country so much" Trumpian narrative.  Fits in well with the "burgeoning violent crime" story line here in the states. 

I wouldn't be surprised if you start seeing RNC commercials on Fox News... exploiting soldiers in wheelchairs with missing limbs.  Obviously, they'd bemoan how Biden sold out the U.S. military.  How the last 20 years of trying to cultivate freedom were all in vain.  Because Biden wants to see our military dismantled, our troops fail, and the Taliban succeed.

 

 

Savage Taliban
sonofsaf

Label me, Taliban, make me go pray
You’ve got a lotta gall, and some disdain
Afghanistan is where we bring the pain
They run this country not going away
Fuck me, savage Taliban
Yes, that is the plan

Their country’s opium has poppy seeds
Rob me of pleasure it is my body
Kabul is shit and the showers urine
They run this country not going away
Fuck me, savage Taliban
Yes, that is the plan

Spanish Caravan
The Doors

Carry me, caravan, take me away
Take me to Portugal, take me to Spain
Andalucia with fields full of grain
I have to see you again and again
Take me, Spanish caravan
Yes, I know you can

Trade winds find Galleons lost in the sea
I know where treasure is waiting for me
Silver and gold in the mountains of Spain
I have to see you again and again
Take me, Spanish caravan
Yes, I know you can

 

 

Some promoter should set up a "The The" tour.  Similar to the "Fake Fest" concept from the mid '90's.  Three distinct cover bands.  First up would be "The The"... so everyone can hang out in the lot and tailgate.  Give 'em 30 minutes or so.  Nobody knows their shit anyway.  Or it could just be a "the" cover band.  Playing some random hits from any band whose name starts with "the" --- the Eagles, the Who, the Beatles, the Stones, the Beach Boys.  You get the drift.

 

Alternate the second and third acts from night to night.  I'd go with The Cars and The Doors.  Bands that basically nobody ever saw... but everyone wants to see.  Let 'em each play for an hour.  And then an extra 15 minutes or so for an extendo double encore, including band member intros, comical anecdotes, stale quips, etc.  

 

Never saw The Doors.  Never been to Afghanistan either.   No desire really.  Although I firmly believe that "Kandahar," is quite possibly, the most wonderful sounding vacation destination on the planet.  And then you get there and realize it's a total shit hole from absolute hell.   

Please do not share this material with the Taliban.

#510. The Allen West Song

If you thought Senator Tim Scott (R-SC) was an Uncle Tom, well, let's just say there's this bruther named Allen West.  In the great state of Texas.

Allen West looks to "fist bump" the Orange Prolapse.  I don't know about you... but I really don't like the sound of that.

 

West actually served a single term as a Florida Congressman.  But got booted in the next go-round.  Too extreme.  So he picked up the fam and moved to Texas.  And now he just filed to run for governor!  Praise dog.  Yeahhhh boy!

But first, he'll have to primary the current Governor Greg Abbott who's about as far right as you can git.  This basically begs the question, exactly who is West trying to appeal to?  Answer:  He's a dark black dude trying to curry favor with a conflagration of Q-Anon adherents, Proud Boy followers, and misc. KKKers.  And oh yeah, the gun nuts.  And this begs the question, are there really enough Republican whack jobs in the state of Texas to actually get this disillusioned, self-hating imposter, anti-wigger oddball elected.  In a general election scenario, no way.  But in a Texas Republican primary?  Maybe.  

For instance, what if Trump and Abbott have a big falling out?  And what about when the Texas electric grid bit the dust?  Everyone froze their asses off.  People remember shit like that. 

I could envision a scenario where Actor Matthew McConaughay wins the Democratic primary and Allen West squeaks by Abbott.  Optics-wise, that'd make for an intriguing, high stakes governor's race.

 

The Allen West Song
sonofsaf

Fucked up world
That Texas drawl
He’s from Florida fool
With his carpetbagger shit.

Gonna feel defeat
Just you wait and see
Greg Abbott will bring him down
It’s just like TIMMY!  We all scream and shout

Allen West’s as brown as shit
On a toilet he will sit

All the dongs in his ass he will screw
Just another faggot fucking you
Uncle Tom piece of shit twat
But an Orange Prolapse he is not

Fucked up world
He acts Jewish
He wants boned, gambling con
With his carpetbagger shit

Disguised as poop
Admit that he’s shit
Take us back to Afghanistan
He’s no worse for wear and all the carpetbagger shit

Allen West’s as brown as shit
On a toilet he will sit

All the dongs in his ass he will screw
Just another faggot fucking you
Uncle Tom piece of shit twat
But an Orange Prolapse he is not

All the dongs in his ass he will screw
Just another faggot fucking you
Uncle Tom piece of shit twat
But an Orange Prolapse he is not

All the dongs in his ass he will screw
Just another faggot fucking you
Uncle Tom piece of shit twat
But an Orange Prolapse he is not

All the dongs in his ass he will screw
Just another faggot fucking you

All the dongs in his ass he will screw
Just another faggot fucking you
Uncle Tom piece of shit twat
Butt an Orange Prolapse he is not

 

The Acid Test Song
Laura Jane Grace & The Devouring Mothers

Catholic girl
From Montreal
She taught Heaven's school
And I was okay with it

Bullet in the street
Looks like luck to me
No doubt that we're tangled now
It's happened before, has yet to ever work out

Coming off a strip of hits
Be careful with that shit

All the songs that I could sing for you
Will never mean anything to you
Only heard what your name was
I never said where my faith was

Catholic girl
From Saint Louis
She talked stoned, rambling on
And I was okay with it

Franchised youth groups
Primitive Baptist
Double parked in the Vatican
You're leaving with her I think I'm not okay with it

Coming off a strip of hits
Be careful with that shit

All the songs that I could sing for you
Will never mean anything to you
Only heard what your name was
I never said where my faith was

All the songs that I could sing for you
Will never mean anything to you
Only heard what your name was
I never said where my faith was

All the songs that I could sing for you
Will never mean anything to you
Only heard what your name was
I never said where my faith was

All the songs that I could sing for you
Will never mean anything to you

All the songs that I could sing for you
Will never mean anything to you
Only heard what your name was
I never said where my faith was

Laura Grace Jones is the lead singer for the band Against Me.  Since 2002, they've played the Burgh a total of 16 times.  Mostly intimate club shows.  Never seen 'em.

Laura Grace Jones was born Thomas James Gabel.  I'll cut straight to the chase.  She's trans.

I've always thought the word "thee" would make a fairly decent pronoun when referring to someone who's transgendered.  First off, it's readily substitutable and rhymes with both "he" and "she."  Plus, it carries with it an established sense of dignity and formality.  At the same, it's deliberately "just vague enough" so as to be inclusive, yet not offensive.  It sounds a little weird at first, but hey, so do words like google, jism, Trump, etc.  After a while, you just get used to it... and in some cases, sickened by it (Trump, not trans).

Please do not share this material with Texas gubernatorial candidate Allen West (R-TX) and/or Laura Grace Jones.

#509. Paul Gosar

Congressman Paul Gosar's very own sister refers to him hateful and bigoted, despicable and disgusting.  Hardly a ringing endorsement.  His other brothers and sisters can't stand him as well.  Last election cycle, they all aggressively campaigned for his opponent (Dr. David Brill).  For the most part, they seem to have disowned him.

However, his sister Jennifer Gosar takes it one step further.  She believes he should be expelled from Congress.  While I wouldn't go that far, I do believe him to be one helluva Trumper scumbag.  Perhaps in a class all his own.

 

Paul Gosar
sonofsaf

You may fall in love with a clown
Admire him from afar
Always say you win have a Big Mac din
And act like a movie star
Trump is an orange big fat blob hangin’ out at the snack bar
But his butt is toxic waste causes much distress
Fuck you in the ass Paul Gosar

Paul Gosar — Paul Gosar (3X)

He tells big lies on the Fox News machine
But your cock’s in his asshole fool
You know that Trump’s a fag drag queen
He is anything but cool
You know that Trump thinks he’s tough
Mar-A-Lago he’s a superstar
He is the Orange Prolapse from Manhattan
Fuck you in the ass Paul Gosar

Paul Gosar — Paul Gosar (3X)

All the Arizona voters get is a bone deep and hard
From Paul Gosar

Well the ambulance siren has come for you
That cock’s in way too tight
And now you’re on a losing streak
You didn’t know how to fight
So when the goin’ gets tough
You’ll probably get a case of SARS
Purpose of asshole’s to take a shit
Wanna be like Paul Gosar

Paul Gosar — Paul Gosar (3X)

Play Guitar
John Mellencamp

You may drive around in your town
Ina brand new shiny car
Your face in the wind your haircut's in
And your friends think you're bizarre
You may find a cushy job and I hope that you go far
But if you really want to taste some cool success
You better learn to play guitar

Play guitar--play guitar (3X)

You got your eyes on the cheerleader queen
And you're walkin' her home from school
You know that she's only seventeen
But you know that your a fool
You know you can't touch this stuff
Without money or a brand new car
Let me give you some good advice young man
You better learn to play guitar

Play guitar--play guitar (3X)

All women around the world want a phony rock star
Who plays guitar

Well you can pump your iron and shine your shoes
And wear your hair just right
You go down out on cruisin' street
'Cause you want to score tonight
We all want to strut our stuff
And you really want to show your scars
Forget all about that macho shit
And learn how to play guitar

Play guitar--play guitar (3X)

Since 1971, John Mellencamp has played Pittsburgh on 21 different occasions.  Impressive.  Saf, what's your favorite John Cougar song?  Gotta go with "Check It Out."  Personally speaking, I'm not much of a fan.  My Star Lake insider sources have confided to me, that while backstage, Mellencamp routinely acts like a prima donna.

John Mellencamp:

7-3-02, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

9-21-02, Post Gazette Pavillion, Burgettstown (Farm Aid) 

7-5-05, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA 

9-16-17, KeyBank Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA (Farm Aid)

Please do not share this material with Congressman Paul Gosar (R-AZ).