April 15, 2021 is Jackie Robinson Day. For those who are seemingly oblivious, Mr. Robinson broke the MLB color barrier on opening day back in 1947.
I celebrated by going to the adjacent venue (Heinz Field) and getting my second Pfizer shot. Exited and did a lap around the ballpark. Normal PNC Park capacity is 38,362. Covid sellout capacity under the Wolf administration is 25% of that figure... or 9,590. Yesterday's attendance was 4,023. It was a chilly afternoon. Cold and brisk. Fortunately, the Pirates managed to score 3 runs. Unfortunately, the Padres scored 8 runs. Such is baseball.
sonofsaf
You’re not a Jew, Jackie Robinson
Jimmy has a boat for you to row
Whoa, whoa, whoa
Bow down to me, Jackie Robinson
Hell is so satanic doncha say
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
We'd like to know if your big dick was fully circumcised
We sell bobbleheads and elves upon a shelf
Look around you all you eat is chicken wings and thighs
Listen to the sounds of fucking from a bone
And here's to you, Jackie Robinson
Jimmy has a boat for you to row
Whoa, whoa, whoa
Bow down to me, Jackie Robinson
Hell is so satanic doncha say
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
Sticking it way up your ass the only place you know
I thought you were manly for goodness sake
He’s got a legacy Mister Robinson did dare
Fuck ‘em all he’d go and get his hair done did
Koo-koo-ka-choo, Jackie Robinson
Jimmy has a boat for you to row
Whoa, whoa, whoa
Bow down to me, Jackie Robinson
Hell is so satanic doncha say
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
Shitting on a toilet during eclipse of the moon
He’s in a diarrhea state
Lick around it, suck around it
Orange prolapse will lose
It’s just a way that all the voters choose
Where have you gone, Donald Trumpio?
Vacation while the country says fuck you
Woo, woo, woo
What's that you say, Jackie Robinson?
Kellyanne has conned her Conaway
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
Mrs. Robinson
Simon & Garfunkel
And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson
Jesus loves you more than you will know
Whoa, whoa, whoa
God bless you, please, Mrs. Robinson
Heaven holds a place for those who pray
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
We'd like to know a little bit about you for our files
We'd like to help you learn to help yourself
Look around you all you see are sympathetic eyes
Stroll around the grounds until you feel at home
And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson
Jesus loves you more than you will know
Whoa, whoa, whoa
God bless you, please, Mrs. Robinson
Heaven holds a place for those who pray
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
Hide it in the hiding place where no one ever goes
Put it in your pantry with your cupcakes
It's a little secret just the Robinson's affair
Most of all you've got to hide it from the kids
Koo-koo-ka-choo, Mrs. Robinson
Jesus loves you more than you will know
Whoa, whoa, whoa
God bless you, please, Mrs. Robinson
Heaven holds a place for those who pray
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
Sitting on a sofa on a Sunday afternoon
Going to the candidates' debate
Laugh about it, shout about it
When you've got to choose
Every way you look at this you lose
Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?
Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you
Woo, woo, woo
What's that you say, Mrs. Robinson?
Jolting Joe has left and gone away
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
Paul Simon:
7-18-99, Star Lake Amphitheater, Burgettstown, PA
7-8-01, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-16-04, Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, PA (w/ Art Garfunkel)
9-7-18, PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
About 25 years ago, a friend of mine, "barely tolerable, youngest brother of three" flew planes for ExecuJet out of Columbus, OH. On this one occasion, a passenger asked if she could use his cell phone to call her husband. That individual was Edie Brickell. Her husband is Paul Simon. And that... is the earth-shattering tale of how we obtained Paul Simon's home telephone number. So if you desperately need to speak with Paul Simon, gimme a ring and I'll see what I can do.
Please do not share this information with Paul Simon, Edie Brickell, and/or any descendents of the late Jackie Robinson.
No comments:
Post a Comment