Monday, November 22, 2021

#856. Britney Spears

If anyone can convince Kenny Rogers to perform my parody of his timeless classic "Through The Years"... I will send them a $100 Applebee's gift certificate.  Oh shit, while doing a search for a photo of The Gambler, I learned of his passing earlier this year.  He was 81. 

Oh what the hell.  I'll let the offer stand for anyone who looks like Kenny Rogers.


And if anyone out there's attending a Britney Spears march/protest/celebration, whatever you call it... feel free to sing my tribute song.  But you won't be getting the Applebee's card.

 


 



Britney Spears
sonofsaf

Do you remember when she shaved her hair
Musical despair the acting career too
Her hair she required conservatorship
What a fucking ding-a-ling dad’s pissed
What a fucking ding-a-ling her father wants to screw

Britney Spears
Shaved her head like a clown
Had a nervous breakdown
She’s back out on the town
She’s not a Jew
Britney Spears
She’s hoping to get laid
She’s filled with pain and rage
Oh but how hard we prayed
Daddy will screw
Britney Spears

I can't remember who was fucking who
Justin fisted you Timberlake didn’t care
Her hair was on the Mickey Mouse club show
Sipping on gin snooping all fo sho
And Britney Spears she fucked for free
Perhaps she was a whore

Britney Spears
Her music’s pretty bad
Her dance moves were so rad
Her comeback makes me mad
Still not a Jew
Britney Spears
I do not think she’s gay
An I.U.D.’s okay
Her cunt is on display
Still not a Jew
Britney Spears

Britney Spears
She wants to sing out strong
Why can’t they get along
Suck on her father’s dong
Daddy will screw
Britney Spears
She used to be far out
She often would sell out
Perhaps she was burned out
Still not a Jew
Britney Spears

Britney Spears
Shaved her head like a clown
Had a nervous breakdown
She’s back out on the town
She is not a Jew
Britney Spears
I do not think she’s gay
Her cunt is on display
Mark Madden said good day
Still not a Jew
Britney Spears

 

Through The Years
Kenny Rogers

I can't remember when you weren't there
When I didn't care for anyone but you
I swear we've been through everything there is
Can't imagine anything we've missed
Can't imagine anything the two of us can't do

Through the years
You've never let me down
You turned my life around
The sweetest days I've found
I've found with you
Through the years
I've never been afraid
I've loved the life we've made
And I'm so glad I stayed
Right here with you
Through the years

I can't remember what I used to do
Who I trusted, who I listened to before
I swear you've taught me everything I know
Can't imagine needing someone so
But through the years it seems to me
I need you more and more

Through the years
Through all the good and bad
I know how much we had
I've always been so glad
To be with you
Through the years
It's better everyday
You've kissed my tears away
As long as it's okay
I'll stay with you
Through the years

Through the years
When everything went wrong
Together we were strong
I know that I belong
Right here with you
Through the years
I never had a doubt
We'd always work things out
I've learned what life's about
By loving you
Through the years

Through the years
You've never let me down
You turned my life around
The sweetest days I've found
I've found with you
Through the years
It's better everyday
You've kissed my tears away
As long as it's okay
I'll stay with you
Through the years




Through the years... Britney Spears has played Pittsburgh a grand total of 5 times.  Two Star Lakes and three arenas.  My favorite Britney is actually a different spelling.  Brittny "Quick Draw" McGraw a/k/a the candy crusher.


Through the years... Kenny Rogers has played Wheeling, WV a total of 5 times.  And Pittsburgh an impressive 22 times.  Never saw the gambler.

Please do not share this material with Britney Spears and/or her father, James Parnell Spears.


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