Monday, April 03, 2023

#1790. Hutchinson

Former Arkansas Governor Asa Hutchinson officially entered the Republican Presidential primary this weekend.  Polling indicates an impressive bump from less than a half percent to a solid 3/4 of 1%. 

His campaign slogan, Asa puts the AR... in Arks, Arkansas, and AR-15s.  Uh, well, it leaves a little bit to be desired.

I guess he's targeting the anti-evolution, Noah's Ark adherents...

... and the faithful, midwestern gun nuts.

Regardless, I say welcome Asa!

Welcome to the shit show.

We're all looking forward to your campaign stop here in Southwestern PA.  My hunch is that Hutch will be spotted begging for spare change in the Chick-Fil-A drive thru on McKnight.  $$$.


Hutchinson hey what is he doin’?
Gonna pray to end all the strife
Asa too has a mass delusion
Not the kind for the extreme right
Hutchinson’s an asshole too
Just a cunt, gonna screw you

Hutchinson hey faking Fox Nation
On the rag
And will blow ‘cause he’s gay
Asa you have a cunt that’s itchin’
He's a g-string pussy on display
Hutchinson, Asa’s who's
Just a cunt, gonna screw you

Hutchinson, Asa’s who
Will fuck you
Just a nerd who deserves castration
Truth Social you know’s bought and sold
Wife’s a cunt who’s East European
Cunt you’ll see, is a MAGA hole

Just a nerd
Truth Social
Wife’s a cunt
Her cunt you’ll see, is a MAGA hole

Hutchinson, Asa's who's
Still a cunt, gonna screw you
Hutchinson’s an asshole too
Jared Kushner’s a Jew


One By One
Neil Diamond

One by one they came disillusioned
Lost their way on the road to life
Two by two they came in confusion
Somehow blind of the guiding light
One by one and two by two
Just begun, so much to do

One by one they break with tradition
Raise their flag
And they go their own way
Two by two they don't want permission
Find their thing and they're doin' okay
One by one, two by two
Just begun, so much to do

One by one, two by two
Me and you
Spread the word to each generation
Truth will grow wherever it's told
Life is love in each incarnation
Love is free, it lives in the soul

Spread the words
Truth will grow
Life is love
And love is free, it lives in the soul

One by one, two by two
So much done, so much to do
One by one and two by two
We gonna make it through

The retired Neil Diamond performed in the Burgh an impressive 19 times.  Always at the arena.  Hey, he's an indoor kinda guy.  Never seen him live.

I'd rate this parody somewhere between blah and meh.

The Big Lie 100: (#953)

#1740.  CPAC (Stand Back --- Stevie Nicks)

#1741.  CPAC's Frightnin' (Smokestack Lightnin' --- Grateful Dead)

#1742.  Hatin' Nate Schatzline (Lay It On the Line --- Triumph)

#1743.  Nate Schatzline (Hold The Line --- Toto)

#1744.*  Faking The Violence (Breaking The Silence --- Queensryche)

#1745.  Treason He's A Cunt (Seasons In The Sun --- Terry Jacks)

#1746.  Tucker (Fucker --- Brian Jonestown Massacre)

#1747.  Lake's My Enemy (Cake And Sodomy --- Marilyn Manson)

#1748.  Newt (Cute --- Bobby Darrin)

#1749.  Donald Trump Is Gay (Take My Breath Away --- Berlin)

#1750.  Markwayne Mullin (Cocaine And Gin --- Kid Rock)

#1751.  Stormy's Better (Stormy Weather --- Billie Holiday)

#1752.  Stormy's Wetter (Stormy Weather --- The Pixies)

#1753.  Bell (Hell --- Foo Fighters)

#1754.  Will Will Slap You (We Will Rock You --- Queen)

#1755.  Donald Trump's a Cunt (On The Wings Of Love --- Jeffrey Osbourne)

#1756.  Donald Is A Child (Bad Boys Running Wild --- Scorpions)

#1757.  Donald's A Child (Running Wild --- Judas Priest)

#1758.  McConnell (Raising Hell --- Tom Morello & Ben Harper)

#1759.  ... Jim Justice Asshole (... And Justice For All --- Metallica) 

#1760.  Mike Pence Is Shit (Don't Fence Me In --- Willie Nelson)

#1761.  Blum (Dumb --- Nirvana)

#1762.  Charlie Kirk Sold Out (We Can Work It Out --- The Beatles)

#1763.  Xi Fucks You (She Loves You --- The Beatles)

#1764.  Has Been Chip Roy (Seek And Destroy --- Metallica)

#1765.  Steil (Smile -- Pearl Jam)

#1766.  Congressman Steil's Critical Race (God Put A Smile Upon Your Face --- Coldplay)

#1767.  Steil's A Liar (Trial By Fire --- Testament)

#1768.  Xi's Fucking Trump's Wife (She's Out Of My Life --- Michael Jackson)

#1769.  His Name Is Dave Williams (How I Made My Millions --- Radiohead)

#1770.  Xi Jinping's A Basket Case (Everything In Its Right Place --- Radiohead)

#1771.  Hovde Will Fuck You (Lovely To See You --- Moody Blues)

#1772.  Jim Justice (Seed Justice --- Neil Young)

#1773.  Steil (Smile --- Michael Jackson)

#1774.  Xi Jinping's Dead (Everything Zen --- Bush)

#1775.  Robinson (Machine Gun --- The Commodores)

#1776.  Donald's An Orange Prolapse Fart (Owner Of A Lonely Heart --- Yes)

#1777.  Nashville Isn't Lucky (Nashville to Kentucky --- My Morning Jacket)

#1778.  Tennessee Dead (Tennessee Jed --- Grateful Dead)

#1779.  Tim Burchett's Shitty (Suffragette City --- David Bowie)

#1780.  On Fox News Sean Hannity (The Frayed Ends Of Sanity --- Metallica)

#1781.  What The Fuck (Thunderstruck --- AC/DC)

#1782.  Indicted (United --- Judas Priest)

#1783.  Indicted Cunt (United Blood --- Agnostic Front)

#1784.  Indicted Not Long (United And Strong --- Agnostic Front)

#1785.  Indicted As Planned (United We Stand --- Elton John)

#1786.  Why Do Proud Boys Need More Dildos (Are There Any More Real Cowboys --- Neil Young)

#1787.  Don't Lie For Trump Tacopina (Don't Cry For Me Argentina --- Madonna)

#1788.  Moore's A Shit Show (More Than You Know --- Eddie Vedder)

#1789.  Asshole Of Obscenity (Centre Of Eternity --- Ozzy Osbourne) 

#1790.  Hutchinson (One By One --- Neil Diamond)

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Please do not share this material with Asa Hutchinson and/or former President Donald J. Trump.



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