#668. Hooked On Trannies

I've never been one to speculate about the deviancy of a United States Supreme Court Justice.  Butt, and that's a but with a capital "B" and two "t's," it's my understanding that Clarence Thomas has a proclivity for transsexual pornography.

Clarence Thomas laughs at the entire female population of Texas.  After all, in his mind, women's reproductive health care issues are largely a joke.

I have only vague recollections of Anita Hill's 1991 testimony before Congress.  But from what I remember, she accused Thomas of filling an empty can of Coke with his own shaved pubic hair.  And then he requested that she insert the can into his rectum while he repeatedly screamed the name "Long Dong Silver."  WTF?!?

 

Hooked On Trannies
sonofsaf

Nooks and Crannies
Thomas’ English Muffins slogan

Who knew that Clarence was had 4 identical bruthas?  He's one proud Duggar, er uh...

I've never spoken with a Supreme Court Justice.  However, I did see Clarence Thomas in action back in the spring of 2012 when my older brother's case (Reichle vs. Howards) reached the highest court in the land.  

 

Mason, me, mom and dad

I even wrote a poem to commemorate the occasion.  Keep in mind, it's mostly predicated on inside family humor.

 

Bennett Goes to D.C.

I've often heard the expression... "when in Rome"
So in our nation's capitol, I give you this poem

Five of sit, here at this table
Let me tell you a story, I assure you I'm able

My father is a wise man, he's unlikely to commit perjury
Even if sedated and coming off knee surgery

But this birthday poem's not really about him, which could be a source of contention
It's mostly about his son's case, which merits our attention

He's the reason we're here.  He wrote the fucking brief.
He's the brains of this trial.  The Commander in Chief.

But mom laid the groundwork, with inspiration and dedication
When she sued that asshole Marockie and the Board of Education

Now your youngest son's the wildcard, I'm sure you'll voluntarily cede
All he wants to talk about is this artificially generated stampede

And you finally get to meet my lovely girlfriend, her name is Georgiann
The more you get to know her, I'm sure you'll become a fan

Standing before the ultimate judiciary, isn't for cowards
Even when the case is a slam dunk, like Reichle vs. Howards

I cannot fathom a hostile act, that is any bolder
Than touching the vice president, directly on the shoulder

And he even had the audacity, to engage in a verbal attack
When he questioned his policies, regarding the war in Iraq

And just where is Dick Cheney?  Why didn't he show up for the case?
Perhaps he's off quail hunting, shooting another friend in the face

But if there is one thing, that I truly detest
It's someone who bitches, about retaliatory arrest

Our highest court has historically sided with the Secret Service
But this case begs the question, are they truly impervious

In a world filled with instability and disunity
Can Secret Service agents act with absolute impunity

In the Supreme court, this case has just been tried
I suspect they'll agree, their immunity is qualified

But an 8 to zero ruling, could still leave you confused. 
Why not 9 to zero?  Elena Kagan was recused.

But what nobody ever knew, was that Bennett would do anything he can
For if the outlook grew dim, he had a secret, master plan  

In the game of golf, we call it taking a mulligan
He'd whip out his ukulele and perform Gilbert and Sullivan

It would be most unorthodox, kind of like a courtroom Aliyah
Just one last ditch attempt, to curry favor with Scalia

Believe it or not, this is my second parody regarding Clarence Thomas and Thomas' English Muffins.

Please do not share this material with United States Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas.