Fall is quickly approaching. How do I know this? Well, Anheuser Busch is releasing its first-ever hard seltzer called Pumpkin Spice Bud Light. The new flavor includes a blend of cinnamon, nutmeg and vanilla. This "beverage" is part of a variety pack which also includes Toasted Marshmallow, Maple Pear and Apple Crisp. Dear god.
This parody's a bit of a tongue twister.
If you're valiant enough to give it a shot, my best suggestion is to slow down the pace.
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
sonofsaf
Flavor Flav Slim Shady, Flavor Flav’s not right
Flavor of the Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
I’d rather have sex with an hermaphrodite
Than drink Toasted Marshmallow Maple Pear Bud Light.
When all the flavors leave you in a state of disarray
And Anheuser’s bush has always seemed a little fucking gay
Cinnamon and nutmeg in your beer’s not right
Cracking open up a can of Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Apple Crisp and beer together makes your skin turn white
And vanilla chuggin’ yinz upsetting not delighting
Try Seltzer Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Trump’s an Orange Prolapsin’ piece of shit alright
We’d like to think his ball sack’s taut not so saggy right
Butt his ass is waitin’ hatin’ for a cock cumming and dribbling
A little Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Try Seltzer Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Knees gettin’ on her knees maybe when she’s goin’ down
Stormy Daniels was a rubbin’ on a douchebag clown
Cinnamon and nutmeg in your beer’s not right
Cracking open up a can of Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Apple Crisp and beer together makes your skin turn white
And vanilla chuggin’ yinz upsetting not delighting
Try Seltzer Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light
Pumpkin Spice Bud Light!
Afternoon Delight
Starland Vocal Band
Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight
Gonna grab some afternoon delight
My motto's always been 'when it's right, it's right'
Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night?
When everything's a little clearer in the light of day
And we know the night is always gonna be there any way
Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite
Looking forward to a little afternoon delight
Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ingite
And the thought of lovin' you is getting so exciting
Sky rockets in flight
Afternoon delight
Afternoon delight
Afternoon delight
Started out this morning feeling so polite
I always thought a fish could not be caught who wouldn't bite
But you've got some bait a waitin' and I think I might try nibbling
A little afternoon delight
Sky rockets in flight
Afternoon delight
Afternoon delight
Afternoon delight
Please be waiting for me, baby, when I come around
We could make a lot of lovin' 'for the sun goes down
Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite
Looking forward to a little afternoon delight
Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ignite
And the thought of lovin' you is getting so exciting
Sky rockets in flight
Afternoon delight
Afternoon delight
Afternoon delight
Afternoon delight!
Husband and wife duo, Bill & Taffy Danoff, were the original members of the Starland Vocal Band formerly known as "Fat City." I find it bothersome... the mere notion that his wife's name is "Taffy." This coming from a guy whom many refer to as "Saffy."
This is actually my second parody of Afternoon Delight. A few months ago, I wrote "Cracker Thune Is White." A tribute to Senator John Thune (R-SD).
Please do not share this material with former President Donald J. Trump and/or Anheuser Busch executives, distributors, consumers, and so on and so forth.
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