#3620. Biden His Fake Autopen

Trump is lashing out about the prior President's use of the autopen.

Any and all Documents, Proclamations, Executive Orders, Memorandums, or Contracts, signed by Order of the now infamous and unauthorized “AUTOPEN,” within the Administration of Joseph R. Biden Jr., are hereby null, void, and of no further force or effect. Anyone receiving “Pardons,” “Commutations,” or any other Legal Document so signed, please be advised that said Document has been fully and completely terminated, and is of no Legal effect. Thank you for your attention to this matter!

 

Hey, anything to distract from the Epstein Files.

 

Yesterday the Orange Prolapse was the recipient of the "FIFA Peace Trophy" at the World Cup draw in D.C.

 

 

The U.S. drew Australia, Paraguay, and a yet to be named opponent (likely Turkey or Romania). 

I can't speak to the worthiness of a trophy that has never existed.  It's only rational purpose was to "pacify the prolapse."  Though I will tell yinz somethin'... Trump does deserve a Golden Toilet Award.

 

Merry Christmas from the cultural district.  Dahntahn!

 

In other news, the Steelers (+6.5) play the Ravens on Sunday.

 

Roberto Clemente Bridge.  For the love of D-g!  But that ain't d-g shit.  THAT... is human excrement (with an abundance of jimmies).

Butt the game is in Baltimore (chapter 2) at M&T Bank Stadium.

The remainder of the Ravens schedule includes Cincy, New England, Green Bay and us.

We got Miami, Detroit, Cleveland and them.

 

 

As usual, it's us and them.

 

 

Here we go Steelers!  Here we go!

During the 2026 draft, Art Rooney II is going to announce the sale of the team to minority Thomas Tull. 

Tull (chapter 7) has a net worth of 5 billion.  His first big move will be to fire Mike Tomlin and bring back Bill Cowher.  Cowher will then become the highest paid coach in the history of the NFL.  Tull will also announce that Snoop Dogg is now a minority owner.  Although his percentage will be less than 1% of the outstanding shares.  It'll primarily be for the symbolism and optics.

Thomas Tull wants to be the hero of Pixburgh.  But you know what they say.

 

Keep in mind, Tull, a MAGA Trumper, is the same douchebag who actually paid the Rolling Stones a million dollars so that his "rock band," the Ghost Hounds, could be their opening act at the stadium.  

He.  Paid.  Them.

I know it's only rock'n'roll but I don't like it.

 

Biden His Fake Autopen 
sonofsaf

Trump masturbated Stormy porno his tool
He’s got no morning wood, daughter a Jew
Ivanka Trump’s devout, a kosher Jew too
A user of autopen

A loser Nancy Mace a gamecock award
South Carolina she’s a government whore
Trump is a retard MAGA welcome aboard
The Donald’s a dimwit

Biden his fake autopen
Kushner’s a fuckin’ Jew
Joe and his fake autopen
A medal of gold for you

The raper Epstein and an Orange Prolapse fart
Their molestation and Big Macs a la carte
They’re sewing discord using their private parts
The Donald’s a dimwit

That Hunter crackhead was a crazy ass single 
Pink slime McDonald’s lard, berry of dingle
The Donald J. Trump’s inbred with Stormy he mingled
A user of autopen

Biden his fake autopen
Kushner’s a fuckin’ Jew
Joe and his fake autopen
A medal of gold for you

Biden his fake autopen
Kushner’s a fuckin’ Jew
Joe and his fake autopen
A medal of gold for you

Biden his fake autopen
Kushner’s a fuckin’ Jew
Joe and his fake autopen
A medal of gold for you

Biden his fake autopen
Kushner’s a fuckin’ Jew
Joe and his fake autopen
A medal of gold for you

 

Into The Great Wide Open
Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers

Eddie waited 'til he finished high school
He went to Hollywood, got a tattoo
He met a girl out there with a tattoo too
The future was wide open

They moved into a place they both could afford
He found a night club he could work at the door
She had a guitar and she taught him some chords
The sky was the limit

Into the great wide open
Under them skies of blue
Out in the great wide open
A rebel without a clue

The papers said Ed always played from the heart
He got an agent and a roadie named Bart
They made a record and it went in the charts
The sky was the limit

His leather jacket had chains that would jingle
They both met movie stars, partied and mingled
Their A&R man said, "I don't hear a single"
The future was wide open

Into the great wide open
Under them skies of blue
Out in the great wide open
A rebel without a clue

Into the great wide open
Under them skies of blue
Out in the great wide open
A rebel without a clue

Into the great wide open
Under them skies of blue
Out in the great wide open
A rebel without a clue

Into the great wide open
Under them skies of blue
Out in the great wide open
A rebel without a clue 

 

If you perform this song at karaoke night, be sure to use the modified syllable progression.  Biden his fake AW... TOE-pen.

One of my Petty favorites.  It's my second parody of Into The Great Wide Open.  Three years ago, I penned #1240.  Perdue's Campaign Is Broken (regarding former Georgia Republican Senator David Perdue).  

He was heartily endorsed by the Orange Prolapse, but got utterly dismantled by Governor Brian Kemp in the 2022 primary. (888,078 to 262,389).  Unlike the overwhelming majority of Republicans, Kemp somehow managed to summon the courage and publicly admit that Biden won the state of Georgia in 2020. 

From 1977 to 2017, Tom Petty played the Burgh a grand total of 17 times.  Petty died from a drug overdose in 2017.  Not to sound petty (Tom Petty)...  but he was 66 years old. 

Tom Petty:

8-26-95, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA

7-10-01, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA (front row center)

7-16-02, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

6-20-13, Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, PA

The Big Lie 100:

#3412.  Epstein Files (Million Miles --- Fuel)

#3413.  Nancy Mace (Cyberspace --- AC/DC)

#3414.  Nancy Mace (Paper Chase --- The Academy Is...)

#3415.  Sarah Qudah (Barracuda --- Heart) 

#3416.  Bolton Bummer (Golden Slumbers --- Paul McCartney)

#3417.  Jeff Crank (Blood Bank --- Macabre)

#3418.  Donald Trump's A Total Shitshow (Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go --- Wham)

#3419.  Laura E. Loomer (I Heard A Rumor --- Bananarama)

#3420.  Gor (War --- Son Lux)

#3421.  Gor (War --- The Exploited)

#3422.  Fat Orange Man (Sharp Dressed Man --- ZZ Top)

#3423.  Senator Rounds (Comforting Sounds --- Mew)

#3424.  Trump Center (Tormentor --- Kreator)

#3425.  Gor (War --- The Cardigans) 

#3426.  O'Neill (The Wheel --- Grateful Dead)

#3427.  Fuck Ashli Babbitt (I Am A Rabbitt --- The Lemonheads)

#3428.  Ernst Was For Sale (Cursed Female --- Porno For Pyros)

#3429.  Donald Clown (Golden Brown --- The Stranglers)

#3430.  Jim O'Neill (Heart Of Steel --- A Flock Of Seagulls)

#3431.  Cracker's A Barrel (Roll Out The Barrel --- West Coast Prost)

#3432.  Scumbag Nancy Mace (Scumbag Human Race --- Destruction)

#3433.  Trump (Plump --- Hole)

#3434.  Laura Loomer (Sense Of Humor --- Daniel Johnston)

#3435.  Ashley Hinson (Turning Crimson --- IAMX)

#3436.  Dana White (Satellite --- Depeche Mode)

#3437.  Dana White (Dynamite --- Scorpions)

#3438.  Dana White (Satellite --- All Time Low)

#3439.  Dana White (One More Night --- Phil Collins)

#3440.  White (Night --- Judy Collins)

#3441.  Dana White (Fly By Night --- Rush)

#3442.  Dana White (Silent Night --- Taylor Swift)

#3443.  White (Fight --- The Cure)

#3444.  Dana White (Satellite --- Brian Jonestown Massacre)

#3445.  Trump Is Inbred (Over My Head --- Alabama Shakes)

#3446.  Amicola (Ayatollah --- Catfish And The Bottlemen)

#3447.  Charlie Kirk (Dirty Work --- Steely Dan)

#3448.  Charlie Kirk Sold Out (We Can Work It Out --- The Beatles)

#3449.  White's Cum (nightcum --- Corbin)

#3450.  Dana White (Satellite --- Guster)

#3451.  Tyler Robinson (Mrs. Robinson --- Simon & Garfunkel)

#3452.  Dana White (See The Light --- Hillsong Worship)

#3453.  Buffalo Bills (Run To The Hills --- Iron Maiden)

#3454.  Russ Diamond (Black Diamond --- Kiss)

#3455.  Tyrus (Iris --- Goo Goo Dolls)

#3456.  Tyrus (Iris --- The Breeders)

#3457.  Tyrus (Iris --- Live)

#3458.  Blow Dana White (Go Fly A Kite --- Bing Crosby)

#3459.  Russ Diamond (Black Diamond --- Bee Gees)

#3460.  Charlie Kirk (Dirty Work --- Sunami)

#3461.  The Orange Prolapse Stain (I Can't Stand The Rain --- Tina Turner)

#3462.  Tyrus (Iris --- Pastel Ghost)

#3463.  Fuck Dana White (The Inner Light --- The Beatles)

#3464.  Antifa (Amnesia --- The Vines)

#3465.  Antifa (Amnesia --- Mr. Kittie)

#3466.  Jimmy Kimmel (Sacrificial --- Death)

#3467.  Tits Are Fake (Cups And Cakes --- Spinal Tap)

#3468.  Dumbfuck Bondi (Must Crush Barbie --- Spinal Tap)

#3469.  Blowing In Mar-a-Lago (Going To California --- Led Zeppelin)

#3470.  The UFC And Dana White (I'm Beginning To See The Light --- Frank Sinatra)

#3471.  Donald Loved Stormy (Gimme Some Money --- Spinal Tap)

#3472.  Jerry Jeudy (Heavy Duty --- Judas Priest)

#3473.  Antifa (Amnesia --- Saga)

#3474.  Congressman Don Bacon (Bringing Home The Bacon --- Procol Harum)

#3475.  Brendan Carr (Drive My Car --- The Beatles)

#3476.  Trump Gold Card (Cop Graveyard --- Teen Suicide)

#3477.  Trump Dump Forever (Hell Bent For Leather)

#3478.  Trump Dump World (Stupid Girl --- Garbage)

#3479.  Trump Is A Shitshow (Come To My Window --- Melissa Etheridge) 

#3480.  Gold Card (Graveyard --- Blue Rodeo)

#3481.  Halligan's Big Lie (Mulligan's Goodbye --- Hamilton)

#3482.  Prosecutor Halligan (Alexander Hamilton --- Hamilton

#3483.  Dirty Cop (Coffee Shop --- Red Hot Chili Peppers)

#3484.  Dirty Cop (Lollipop --- The Chordettes)

#3485.  Dirty Cop (Candy Shop --- 50 Cent & Olivia)

#3486.  SLIMEBALL (Rag Doll --- Franki Valli & The Four Seasons)

#3487.  Dirty Cop (Lollipop --- Treblemakers)

#3488.  Trump Shutdown (Lay It Down --- Ratt)

#3489.  The Donald's Trumpin' And Dumpin' (You've Got Another Thing Comin' --- Judas Priest)

#3490.  Slimeball (Rag Doll --- Aerosmith)

#3491.  The Donald Shutdown (The Final Countdown --- Europe)

#3492.  Shutdown (Downtown --- Petula Clark)

#3493.  Shutdown Street (Shakedown Street --- Grateful Dead)

#3494.  Shutdown (Breakdown --- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)

#3495.  Trump Shut Shit Down (Don't Bring Me Down --- Electric Light Orchestra)

#3496.  Jared Kushner's A Jew (What I Like About You --- The Romantics)

#3497.  Shutdown (Slow Down --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#3498.  Pete Hegseth (Kiss of Death --- Dokken)

#3499.  Peter Hegseth (Angel Of Death --- Slayer)

#3500.  Fake News (Bad News --- Zach Bryan)

#3501.  Trumpin'  (Truckin' --- Grateful Dead)

#3502.  Donald's Hair & Andy Barr (Kitchenwares & Candy Bars --- Stone Temple Pilots)

#3503.  Pete Hegseth (Kiss Of Death --- New Order)

#3504.  Univision (Television --- Stabbing Westward)

#3505.  Nobel Peace Prize (Devil Inside --- INXS)

#3506.  Scavino (Don't You Know --- The Hollies)

#3507.  Trump Fucked Stormy (Pump Dat Party --- Chemical Brothers)

#3508.  Donald J. Trump (Mutual Slump --- DJ Shadow)

#3509.  Scavino (Don't You Know --- DEVO)

#3510.  Trump (Slump --- Ginger Root)

#3511.  Dumping In Mar-A-Lago (Humping On Your Stereo --- Supergrass)

#3512.  Meloni (Bologna --- Oscar Meyer Commercial)

#3513.  Kushner's A Fucking Jew (Making Our Dreams Come True --- Cyndi Grecco)

#3514.  Scott Kenneth Bessent (Under The Crescent --- Lake Of Tears)

#3515.  Disarm (Disarm --- Smashing Pumpkins)

#3516.  Vince Fong (Bird Song --- Grateful Dead)

#3517.  Scott Bessent's Face (Incessant Mace --- Soundgarden)

#3518.  Kirk Was A Bitch (Working The Ditch --- Melvins)

#3519.  Blue Slip (One Slip --- Pink Floyd)

#3520.  Gallrein (Cocaine --- Eric Clapton)

#3521.  Thune Plan (Spoonman --- Soundgarden)

#3522.  Scott Bessent's Gay (Fluorescent Grey)

#3523.  Ed Gallrein (Ball And Chain --- The Who)

#3524.  Matt Van Epps (Baby Steps --- Olivia Dean)

#3525.  William Crain (Mary Jane --- Spin Doctors)

#3526.  William Crain (Gravy Train --- Staus Quo)

#3527.  Cole (Hole --- Jimmie's Chicken Shack)

#3528.  Donald Trump And Paul Gosar (Anyone Can Play Guitar --- Radiohead)

#3529.  Ballroom Shit (Ballroom Blitz --- Krokus)

#3530.  Ballroom (Perfume --- Old 97's)

#3531.  Ballroom Bullshit (Courtroom Spirit --- Annette Soundtrack)

#3532.  Sununu (Who Are You --- Black Sabbath)

#3533.  Brad Little's Turds (Three Little Birds --- Bob Marley & The Wailers)

#3534.  'Vanka's A Jew (Still Loving You --- Scorpions)

#3535.  Donald's In Charge (Charles In Charge --- Sitcom theme song)

#3536.  Andrew Clyde (Suicide --- Teen Suicide)

#3537.  (Ice Team) --- ((Nice Dream) --- Radiohead)

#3538.  Arctic Frost (Holocaust --- Ceremony)

#3539.  Arctic Frost (Holocaust --- Dan England & John Ford Coley)

#3540.  Tylenol (Waterfall --- Bananarama)

#3541.  Tylenol (Cannonball --- The Breeders)

#3542.  Arctic Frost (Holocaust --- Son Volt)

#3543.  Melissa (Melissa --- King Diamond)

#3544.  Trump Dumpin' It's The Ballroom Shitshow (She Came In Through The Bathroom Window --- The Beatles)

#3545.  Peace Through Strength (Give Me Strength --- Eric Clapton)

#3546.  Peace Through Strength (Inner Strength --- Hilary Duff)

#3547.  Peace Through Strength (Give Me Strength --- Neil Young)

#3548.  Tylenol (Waterfall --- Electric Light Orchestra)

#3549.  Ballroom (Perfume --- The Jesus And Mary Chain)

#3550.  Nigeria (Albania --- Coach from Cheers)

#3551.  Forty-Five (So Alive --- Love And Rockets)

#3552.  Andrew Clyde (Mama Tried --- Grateful Dead)

#3553.  Stormy's Thong (We Belong --- Pat Benatar)

#3554.  Stormy's Thong Forever (We Belong Together --- Bad Brains)

#3555.  Stormy's Thong Brings Pleasure (We Belong Together --- Ritchie Valens)

#3556.  Andrew Clyde (Suicide --- Puddle of Mudd)

#3557.  Donald Is A Wimp (Danny Is A Wimp --- Screeching Weasel)

#3558.  Scharf Lie (Barfly --- Ray LaMontagne)

#3559.  Ballroom (Perfume --- Marilyn Manson)

#3560.  Seven (Heaven --- Bryan Adams)

#3561.  Casey Means (Pork And Beans --- Weezer)

#3562.  Fuentes Is Inbred (Always In My Head --- Coldplay)

#3563.  Shitshow MAGA Trumper (Hello From The Gutter --- Overkill)

#3564.  Liz Peek (Don't Speak --- No Doubt)

#3565.  Two Thousand Dollars (A Thousand Miles --- Vanessa Carlton)

#3566.  Liz Peek (Boutique --- Love Is Noise)

#3567.  Amon-Ra St. Brown (Runnin' Down A Dream --- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)

#3568.  Amon-Ra: St. Brown Clown (Farmingdale: The Downtown --- They Might Be Giants)

#3569.  Amon-Ra St.: Brown Is A Clown) (Shake Your Body: Down To The Ground --- The Jacksons)

#3570.  Amon-Ra St. Brown (Just Another Clown --- Jigsaw Youth)

#3571.  Saint Brown (Breakdown --- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)

#3572.  Epstein Hoax (Different Strokes theme song --- Alan Thicke)

#3573.  Stormy D.  (Hard On Me --- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)

#3574.  Marjorie (Forgery --- Prong)

#3575.  Fuck Tha Police (Karma Police --- Radiohead)

#3576.  The Donald And Marjorie (Cool Amber And Mercury --- Phish)

#3577.  Trumpin' 'n Dumpin' (Money For Nothing --- Dire Straits)

#3578.  Newt (Nude --- Radiohead)

#3579.  Stormy D.  (Jammin' Me -- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)

#3580.  Rod Bray (Good Day --- New Hope Club)

#3581.  Epstein Files (100 Miles --- Bad Company)

#3582.  Jeff Epstein Files (A Hundred Miles --- Meat Puppets)

#3583.  The Epstein Files (A Million Miles --- Heart)

#3584.  Jeff Epstein Files (10,000 Miles --- Mary Chapin Carpenter)

#3585.  Jeff Epstein Files (Five Hundred Miles --- Justin Timberlake)

#3586.  Epstein Files Hooray (Million Miles Away --- The Offspring)

#3587.  Matt Van Epps (Fifteen Steps --- Radiohead)

#3588.  Infection Of The Yeast (The Number Of The Beast --- Iron Maiden)

#3589.  Greene (Green --- The Dandy Warhols)

#3590.  The Orange Prolapse Clown (The Heart Of A Clown --- Willie Nelson)

#3591.  Ivanka (Roseanna --- Toto)

#3592.  Hunt (Hunt --- Oklou)

#3593.  Wesley Hunt (Battlefront --- Rage Of Light)

#3594.  A MAGA Kerfuffle (The Super Bowl Shuffle --- 1985 Chicago Bears team)

#3595.  Hunt's A Clown (Hunted Down --- Soundgarden)

#3596.  Fucking Jew (Wrecking Crew --- Overkill)

#3597.  Has A Job To Blow (Woman From Tokyo --- Deep Purple)

#3598.  Happy Thanksgiving (The Unforgiven --- Metallica)

#3599.  Charlotte's Web (Arrowhead --- Torche)

#3600.  The Epstein Files (2,000 Miles --- The Pretenders)

#3601.  Matty Van Epps (Gimme Three Steps --- Lynyrd Skynyrd)

#3602.  Orange Clown (Right Now --- Van Halen)

#3603.  Jeff Epstein Files (I Walk For Miles --- Dinosaur Jr.)

#3604.  Travis Turner (Afterburner --- Saxon)

#3605.  Stormy D.  (Let It Be --- The Beatles)

#3606.  Nehls (Shells --- Mirah)

#3607.  Jeff Epstein Files (How Many Miles --- MK.gee)

#3608.  Nehls (Shells --- Mighty Oaks)

#3609.  Travis Turner (Afterburner --- Panda Bear)

#3610.  Secretary Howard Lutnick (It Always Rains On A Picnic --- Modest Mouse)

#3611.  Susan Dell's Crap Is (What The Hell Happened --- Bruce Hornsby)

#3612.  Coup D'etat Is A Crime (Seemingly Endless Time --- Death Angel)

#3613.  What The Hell (Susan Dell --- Chastity Belt)

#3614.  Larry Summers (Seven Wonders --- Fleetwood Mac)

#3615.  David Gentile (Once In A While --- Neil Diamond)

#3616.  Susan Dell (What The Hell --- Elvin Bishop & Charlie Musselwhite)

#3617.  Jeff Epstein Files Hooray (A Thousand Miles Away --- New Edition)

#3618.  Catahoula Crunch (Two Minutes Til Lunch --- Wall Of Voodoo)

#3619.  Larry Summers (Seven Summers --- Saint Etienne)

#3620.  Biden His Fake Autopen (Into The Great Wide Open --- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers) 

Please do not share this material with former President Joe Biden and/or President Donald J. Trump.