#505. Oakland Raiders

Back in the summer of 1995, I was hanging out with Withered Wife Beater.  We were game planning for the Allman Brothers at Star Lake.  I mentioned how I really didn't know many of their tunes and he was like, "Saf, you know their songs.  You just don't know that you know their songs.  I shrugged.  "Well, I do like the silver dollar song."  He replied, "Yeah, you mean Midnight Rider.  Definitely one of their better tunes."

As the concert came to a close, we watched from the steps on the main drag above the pavilion seats.  The "Whipping Post" encore came to an end.  He flashed a grin and said, "You gotta love that trash can ending.  Pure Allman Brothers."

So from 25+ years ago, I summoned the essence of that conversation and channeled my "inner fantasy" and penned "Darren Waller" (their indomitable 6'6" tight end).  Which morphed into a parody called "Oakland Raiders."

 

Oakland Raiders
sonofsaf

Well, I gotta catch, it keeps me balling
Take big breaths, to keep from stalling
My name is tight end Darren Waller
But I’m not gonna drop the ball you know
Not gonna let ‘em fuck the Oakland Raiders

And I don’t know gorilla warfare
Battle field, worthy (war thee) endeavor
My name is tight end Darren Waller
But I’m not gonna drop the ball you know
Not gonna let ‘em fuck the Oakland Raiders

When they play zone, I am so daring
Some pigskin, I’ll soon be wearing
My name is tight end Darren Waller
But I’m not gonna drop the ball you know
Not gonna let ‘em fuck the Oakland Raiders
No I’m not gonna drop the ball you know
Not gonna let ‘em fuck the Oakland Raiders
No I’m not gonna drop the ball you know
Not gonna let ‘em fuck the Oakland Raiders
But I’m not gonna drop the ball you know
Not gonna let ‘em fuck the Oakland Raiders

Midnight Rider
Allman Brothers

Well, I've got to run to keep from hiding
And I'm bound to keep on riding
And I've got one more silver dollar (Darren Waller)
But I'm not gon' let 'em catch me, no
Not gon' let 'em catch the midnight rider

And I don't own the clothes I'm wearing
And the road goes on forever
And I've got one more silver dollar
But I'm not gon' let 'em catch me, no
Not gonna let 'em catch the midnight rider

And I've gone by the point of caring
Some old bed I'll soon be sharing
And I've got one more silver dollar
But I'm not gon' let 'em catch me, no
Not gon' let 'em catch the midnight rider
No, I'm not gon' let 'em catch me, no
Not gon' let 'em catch the midnight rider
No, I'm not gon' let 'em catch me, no
I'm not gon' let 'em catch the midnight rider
But I'm not gonna let 'em catch me, no
Not gon' let 'em catch the midnight rider

Oakland Raiders:

12-7-03, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA

12-6-09, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA

11-21-10, Heinz Field, Pittsburgh, PA

Allman Brothers:

9-1-95, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
6-25-97, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
8-19-01, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
8-16-02, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
7-26-03, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
9-5-04, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
8-15-07, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

Since 1971 (when I was 1), the Allman Brothers have played Pittsburgh 24 times.

The once-mighty Steelers open their home schedule against the arch nemesis Oakland Raiders.  Heinz Field will be at "full capacity" on September 19, 2021 for the traditional 1 o'clock start.   Curious to see how that "sold-out visual" manifests itself. #PSL4idiots

I suspect they'll bounce back after getting beat by the Bills... and start the season 1-1.  

Please do not share this material with NFL tight end Darren Waller and/or Oakland Raiders fans.