#36. Fetterman

Gotta love our Lt. Governor John Fetterman (D-PA).  With a national political climate grounded in calculated waffling, deliberate indifference, and blatant lies... Fetterman takes the alternative approach.  He just tells it like it is.  

John, as you consider a run for U.S. Senate, lemme take the opportunity to remind you of my t-shirt idea.  It's based on the late 1980's style heavy metal concert t-shirt.  On the front, in the upper right hand corner, would be the outline of the state of Pennsylvania.  One word inside the outline --- FETTERMAN.  Stick with your standard font.  No mention of the year or political office.  Brand yourself above and beyond the traditional political garb.

But my idea is for a series of "touring shirts."  Black shirt, white print.  The logo on the front remains the same.  Information on the back would vary.

The main shirt would have an extensive list of Pennsylvania towns and cities, both large and small.  The other would be PA sports franchises, collegiate and professional.  And the other one would consist of notable landmarks and iconic locations.  The theory of it all being in the form of a "to-do" checklist.  Encouraging people to get out there and explore the Keystone state, support Pennsylvania businesses, and contribute to the economic recovery.  In essence, using tourism and monetary recirculation to help build our state's economy back in a post-Covid world.

The whole premise is grounded in the notion that Fetterman's a populist who has frequented every nook and cranny of the state.  Think in terms of a "yinzer political Thomas' English Muffin."

Use the entire line of t-shirts as a fundraising mechanism for the campaign and a select charity, preferably Gisele's Free Store.  Similar to the Bernie Sanders sweatshirts where proceeds went to support the Vermont Meals on Wheels program.

Dedicated to the guy below.  Thanks for the memories. (10-7-15, outside PNC Park, MLB Wildcard game: Cubs 4 Pirates 0).

Fetterman
sonofsaf

Livin’, here in Braddock
To Harrisburg, he’s gonna hop
PA, we adore
He’s always within reach
An apple to the core, a turnover
Won’t bend too deep, never a pushover

Eagles, but know he’s a Steelers fan
We got the Fetterman
He screams for justice, he’ll wake the dead
We got the Fetterman
We got the Fetterman
We got the Fetterman
Oh

The elf on a shelf
He sees John’s head not in photos
He tells himself
Build it back, with hair cut can’t go wrong
Still waiting for the mullet to come back strong
Shakin’ up shit, does not wear a thong  

Eagles, but know he’s a Steelers fan
We got the Fetterman
He screams for justice, he’ll wake the dead
We got the Fetterman
He drives and walks our state from within
We got the Fetterman
He screams for justice, he’ll wake the dead
We got the Fetterman
We got the Fetterman
We got the Fetterman

We love him
In PA, we want him to stay
We’ll need him, yeah
That's why he’ll be back again

We got the Fetterman (we got the Fetterman)
We got the Fetterman (we got the Fetterman)
We got the Fetterman (we got the Fetterman)
We got the Fetterman

 

Better Man
Pearl Jam

Waitin', watchin' the clock
It's four o'clock, it's got to stop
Tell him, take no more
She practices her speech
As he opens the door, she rolls over
Pretends to sleep as he looks her over

She lies and says she's in love with him
Can't find a better man
She dreams in color, she dreams in red
Can't find a better man
Can't find a better man
Can't find a better man
Oh

Talking to herself
There's no one else who needs to know
She tells herself
Memories back when she was bold and strong
And waiting for the world to come along
Swears she knew him, now she swears he's gone

She lies and says she's in love with him
Can't find a better man
She dreams in color, she dreams in red
Can't find a better man
She lies and says she still loves him
Can't find a better man
She dreams in color, she dreams in red
Can't find a better man
Can't find a better man
Can't find a better man

She loved him, yeah
She don't want to leave this way
She feeds him, yeah
That's why she'll be back again

Can't find a better man (can't find a better man)
Can't find a better man (can't find a better man)
Can't find a better man (can't find a better man)
Can't find a better man

Pearl Jam Concerts:

8-25-98, Star Lake Amphitheater, Burgettstown, PA
9-5-00, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
9-28-05, PNC Park, Pittsburgh, PA (opened for the Rolling Stones)
6-23-06, Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
10-27-09, Wachovia Spectrum, Philadelphia, PA
10-28-09, Wachovia Spectrum, Philadelphia, PA
5-6-10, Nationwide Arena, Columbus, OH
5-9-10, Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, OH
10-11-13, Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, PA
10-1-14, U.S. Bank Arena, Cincinnati, OH
9-26-15, Central Park, New York City, NY (Global Citizen Festival)
4-28-16, Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, PA
4-29-16, Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, PA

Please do not share this information with Lt. Governor John Fetterman (D-PA), Senator Bernie Sanders (D-VT),  Eagles fans, Steelers fans, Braddock residents, musician Eddie Vedder, and/or those who consume Thomas' English Muffins.