Friday, October 21, 2022

#1502. Asshole In Trump Tower... Stinking

Donald Trump has a MAGA (Morons And Gullible Assholes) rally scheduled for tomorrow night in Robstown, Texas near Corpus Christi.  A jumbo-sized list of Lone Star sycophants is scheduled to speak.

Lt. Governor Dan Patrick, Lieutenant Governor of Texas

Attorney General Ken Paxton, Attorney General of Texas

Rep. Michael Cloud, U.S. Representative for Texas’ 27th Congressional District

Mr. Tom Homan, Former Acting Director of U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement

Mr. Brandon Judd, President of the National Border Patrol Council


But someone noticeable is missing.  Pray tell, who could it be?

Texas Governor Greg "Hot Wheels" Abbott.

So why didn't Abbott make the cut?  Well, it's because people with physical disabilities make the Orange Prolapse feel uncomfortable.  Simple as that.

So how about a few Trump Dumps from last night's Penguins game at PPG?

Centre Avenue, upper lot

The first ever Super Genius Trump Dump.  Lower arena entrance.

Crawford St.  Where the cool kids park... for free.  Instead of the Arena's hallowed garage ($43.00).

Zero scalpers last night outside the arena.  I think the downtown cops decided to clamp down on hockey games.  Curious to see if any "ticket brokers" show up for the concert on Saturday (Smashing Pumpkins and Jane's Addiction).  It's incredibly tempting to check the setlists for this show.  But I shall decline.  Regardlesss, speaking of Jane's Addiction... 

(mark 6:14)

Asshole In Trump Tower… Stinking

Asshole in Trump Tower stinking
A coup d’etat’s the plan
McDonald’s he’s a feeder
A Big Mac every hour…
He’s gay and full of bullshit
Complete and total shit
His wife never has sex
Just a dildo for herself

In Trump Tower

Asshole in Trump Tower stinking
Always hating Nancy Pelosi
He wants to be feared and dreaded
Be… feared and dreaded
A coward and piece of shit
He’s a coward and piece of shit
Not Superman
No manhood
And Ivanka is a little snot
Ivanka is a little snot
His wife never has sex
Just a dildo for herself…

In Trump Tower

Asshole in Trump Tower stinking
And his urine’s smelling funny
Donald Trump’s ass was fisted
He’s a porn star amateur
A douchebag deep in debt
An Orange Prolapse we regret
McDonald’s food...
Big Mac is food…
And Ivanka is a little snot
Ivanka is a little snot
His wife never has sex
Just a dildo for herself…

In Trump Tower


Standing In The Shower... Thinking
Jane’s Addiction

Standing in the shower thinking
About what makes a man
An outlaw or a leader
I'm thinking about power...
The ways a man could use it
Or be destroyed by it
The water hits my neck
And I'm pissing on myself...

In the shower

Standing in the shower thinking
About a man I know don't like me
He don't like the place I'm headed
Same place he's headed...
I know he'd beat me to it
If he could but he won't do it
But he would man
If he could...
And the water is piping hot..
The water is piping hot
It beats upon my neck
And I'm pissing on myself...

In the shower

Standing in the shower thinking
Is my woman afraid of me?
She's seen how far I've twisted
It's just cause I can trust her
And ever since we met
She understood so she let
Me twist her good...
I twist her good...
And the water is piping hot
The water is piping hot
It beats upon my neck
And I'm pissing on myself...

In the shower

Favorite tunes off Nothing Shocking?  You gotta love the Dead inspired segues (Up the Beach > Ocean Size & Summertime Rolls > Mountain Song)

From 1988 to the present day, Jane's Addiction has played the Burgh a grand total of 8 times.

Jane’s Addiction:

5-7-91, A.J. Palumbo Center, Pittsburgh, PA*
7-19-03, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA (Lollapalooza)
7-10-15, Stage AE, Pittsburgh, PA

* One of my all time favorite Top 10 concerts.

Porno for Pyros:

8-20-93, I.C. Light Amphitheatre, Pittsburgh, PA

The Big Lie 100: (#677)

#1417.  Crudite Mode (Holiday Road --- Lindsey Buckingham)

#1418.  Wants Crudite (So Far Away --- Dire Straits)

#1419.  The Crudite (Not Fade Away --- Grateful Dead)

#1420.  Crudite Din (Holiday Inn --- Elton John)
#1421.  Tiffany Smiley (Baba O'Riley --- Grateful Dead)

#1422.  Markwayne (Cocaine --- Eric Clapton)
#1423.  Coco Elaine (Hello Again --- The Cars)
#1424.  Ill Campaigns (Still Remains --- Stone Temple Pilots)
#1425.  Crudite (Yesterday --- Paul McCartney)
#1426.  Roe Roe Roe Your Vote (Row Row Row Your Vote --- Ella Fitzgerald)
#1427.  Tate Reeves (Governor Blows) (Believe (Nobody Knows) --- My Morning Jacket)
#1428.  Eatin' Crudite (Surfin' U.S.A. --- Beach Boys)
#1429.  Mrs. Smiley (Mr. Smiley --- Poison)
#1430.  Mitch McConnell (Old MacDonald --- Unknown)
#1431.  Master Is Special (Master Of Puppets --- Metallica) 

#1432.  Crudite (Holiday --- Bee Gees)
#1433.  Fucked Up Ass Blake Masters (Fabulous Disaster --- Exodus)
#1434.  Mrs. Smiley (Mr. Crowley --- Ozzy Osbourne)
#1435.  Talk To Mark Meadows (Walk In The Shadows --- Queensryche)
#1436. Chris Kice (The Price -- Twisted Sister)

#1437.  Crudite (Stay Away --- Nirvana)

#1438.  Crudite (New Year's Day --- U2)

#1439.  One More Crudite Bite (One More Saturday Night --- Grateful Dead)

#1440.  The Crudite's Bad (The Crudite) (Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away) --- Motley Crue)

#1441.  Crudite (Say Say Say --- Paul McCartney & Michael Jackson)

#1442.  That Donald Trump Is... (All In The Name Of... Motley Crue)

#1443.  Comer Isn't Very Smart (Owner Of A Lonely Heart --- Yes)

#1444.  Mehmet Oz (Just Because --- Jane's Addiction)

#1445.  A Piece Of Shit From The Start (Total Eclipse Of The Heart --- Bonnie Tyler)

#1446.  J.D. (Lady --- Styx)

#1447.  J.D. Vance (My Romance --- Carly Simon)

#1448.  Donald Trump's Hair (Ya Mo B There --- Michael McDonald)

#1449.  Dixon, Tudor (Touch My Tooter --- Ween)

#1450.  J.D. (Lady --- Little River Band)

#1451.  J.D. Is Gay (Lay Lady Lay --- Bob Dylan)

#1452.  Tudor Dixon (Superstition --- Stevie Wonder)

#1453.  Richard Woods (Harry Hood --- Phish)

#1454.  Woods (Would --- Alice In Chains)

#1455.  Ted Budd (Blackbird --- The Beatles)

#1456.  Budd Is Far Right (Bloody Well Right --- Supertramp)

#1457.  Trump's Strange (La Grange --- ZZ Top)

#1458.  Ashley Kalus (Brokedown Palace --- Grateful Dead)

#1459.  Hung Cao (Right Now --- Van Halen)

#1460.  Hung Cao (Black Cow --- Steely Dan)

#1461.  Scott Jensen (Confusion --- Electric Light Orchestra)

#1462.  Meet Mehmet (Meet The Mets --- Ruth Roberts & Bill Katz)

#1463.  Bolduc (Holed Up --- The Raconteurs)

#1464.  Bolduc's Fucked up (Hold Your Head Up --- Argent)

#1465.  Vance Is A Cunt (Eminence Front --- The Who)

#1466.  Oh Mike Lindell (The First Noel --- Brian Wilson)

#1467.  A Fucking Assclown (The Final Countdown --- Europe)

#1468.  Kim Jong Un Will Fight (Afternoon Delight --- Starland Vocal Band)

#1469.  Majewski's Outta Line (Nobody's Fault But Mine --- Led Zeppelin)

#1470.  I Guess That's Why They Call Him A Jew (I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues --- Elton John)

#1471.  Crudite Plate (Runaway Train --- Soul Asylum)

#1472.  Roger Stone (Danger Zone --- Kenny Loggins)

#1473.  Roger Stone (Danger Zone --- The Ramones)

#1474.  Laxalt (Asshole --- Tom Petty)

#1475.  Trump Is A Bitch (Under The Bridge --- Red Hot Chili Peppers)

#1476.  Mark Meadows Loves Gay Porn (Every Rose Has A Thorn --- Poison)

#1477.  Kim Jong's Illin' (You Be Illin' --- Run DMC)

#1478.  Bad Roger Stone (Bad To The Bone --- George Thorogood & The Destroyers)

#1479.  Burt (Hurt --- Nine Inch Nails)

#1480.  Pate Is A Geek (Eight Days A Week --- The Beatles)

#1481.  Poor Sandy Smith (Poor Ellen Smith --- Billy Strings)

#1482.  Laxalt (Blackout --- Scorpions)

#1483.  Steve J. Scalise (Karma Police --- Radiohead)

#1484. Steve Scalise (Dream Police --- Cheap Trick)

#1485.  Teddy Cruz (Boggie Shoes --- KC & The Sunshine Band)

#1486. Ronchetti (Black Betty --- Metal Church)

#1487.  Joe O'Dea (Day By Day --- The Hooters)

#1488.  Tommy Tuberville (A View To A Kill --- Duran Duran) 

#1489.  Fuck You Trumpers (All You Zombies --- The Hooters)

#1490.  A. Biggs (War Pigs --- Black Sabbath)

#1491.  Rubio Ga Ga (Radio Ga Ga --- Queen)

#1492.  Moran (Old Man --- Neil Young)

#1493.  Trump's A Liar (Ring Of Fire --- Johnny Cash)

#1494.  Why Does Ivanka Blow (Where Do The Children Go --- The Hooters)

#1495.  Why Why, Gay Gay (Chris Sununu) (My My, Hey Hey (Out Of The Blue) --- Neil Young)

#1496.  Tonight Ivanka Masturbates For You (Tonight I Want To Celebrate With You --- My Morning Jacket)

#1497.  Marco A. Rubio (Turn Up The Radio --- Autograph)

#1498.  Tshibaka (Fuck You) (Axilla (Part II --- Phish)

#1499.  Sinning (Winning --- Santana)

#1500.  Nunes (Jane Says --- Jane's Addiction)

#1501.  (We Don't Want No) Kenneth Paxton (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction --- Rolling Stones)

#1502.  Asshole In Trump Tower... Stinking

Please do not share this material with former President Donald J. Trump.


No comments: