#1506. Marco Rubio's A Clown And A Retard

Virtually all of the polls have Val Demings trailing incumbent douchebag 'Lil Marco Rubio (R-FL).

Kinda surprising because Demings is an unusually strong candidate and Rubio's a spineless stooge.  But these days, Florida's just too damn red.  Anyhoo, here's some Trump Dumps from yesterday afternoon.

 

Pile of discarded Cheetos on Liberty Ave.  The Orange Prolapse is occasionally referred to as the "Angry Cheetoh"

Penn Ave. heading into the Strip District.

"My body my choice is ridiculous nonsense." --- Doug Mastriano.

 

 

Penn Avenue.  Cultural District in the bike lane.  An impressive Keystone dump.

Outside PNC Park.  A Trump Dump not befitting the morbidly obese.  Probably should have been a Jared Kushner.

Dedicated to J-Wreck, my old golfing buddy who moved to Florida.  You should play my version at your next open mic gig.

 

Marco Rubio’s A Clown And A Retard
sonofsaf

Now Ronald McDonald’s so god damn red
All he cares about’s the Bidenflation
Donald needs a hand out ‘cause there is no doubt
He’s fomenting up an insurrection
Fuck Ivanka’s bra
She doesn’t need a bra
Stormy Daniels’ bra
She doesn’t wear a bra

The Orange Prolapse clown with a syndrome down
Is gonna raid your union pension
With a double yoi* and a dildo toy
He’s gonna stick it up your ass penetration
Well Donald is gay
And Melania’s ho-ing
Trump’s fucking gay coup d’etat’s a crime
With some truth or dare
It’s why the GOP is hatin’ Obama
Fuckin’ Marco Rubio’s
A clown and a retard
Fuckin’ Marco Rubio’s
A clown and a retard

The First Lady betrayed by Stormy
D in the hay
Fuckin’ tits are an endless “D”
Bigger than McDonald’s feast
Or infection of yeast
Toilet stall with a lover super freak
Well Donald is gay
And Melania’s ho-ing
Trump’s fucking gay coup d’etat’s a crime
With some truth or dare
It’s why the GOP is hatin’ Obama
Fuckin’ Marco Rubio’s
A clown and a retard
M m m Marco Rubio’s
A clown and a retard
Yeah, Marco Rubio’s
A clown and a retard

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Marco Rubio’s a clown and a retard
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Marco Rubio’s a clown and a retard
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Marco Rubio’s a clown and a retard
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Marco Rubio’s a clown and a retard

 

Me And Julio Down By The Schoolyard
Paul Simon

The mama pajama rolled out of bed
And she ran to the police station
When the papa found out he began to shout
And he started the investigation
It's against the law
It was against the law
What the mama saw
It was against the law

The mama looked down and spit on the ground
Everytime my name gets mentioned
The papa said oy if I get that boy
I'm gonna stick him in the house of detention
Well I'm on my way
I don't know where I'm going
I'm on my way I'm taking my time
But I done know where
Goodbye to Rosie the queen of Corona
See you, me and Julio
Down by the schoolyard
See you, me and Julio
Down by the schoolyard

In a couple of days they come and
Take me away
But the press let the story leak
Now when the radical priest
Come to get me released
We was all on the cover of Newsweek
Well I'm on my way
I don't know where I'm going
I'm on my way I'm taking my time
But I don't know where
Goodbye to Rosie the queen of Corona
See you, me and Julio
Down by the schoolyard
M m m me and Julio
Down by the schoolyard
Yeah, me and Julio
Down by the schoolyard

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Me and Julio down by the schoolyard
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Me and Julio down by the schoolyard
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Me and Julio down by the schoolyard
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Me and Julio down by the schoolyard

I know, I know... there's an extra syllable in the title.  So let it be written, so let it be done.

Favorite Paul Simon song?  That's a tough one.  Plenty to choose from.  I'd probably go with "The Obvious Child."

Paul Simon:

7-18-99, Star Lake Amphitheater, Burgettstown, PA

7-8-01, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

6-16-04, Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, PA (w/ Art Garfunkel)

9-7-18, PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, PA

The Big Lie 100: (#681)

#1417.  Crudite Mode (Holiday Road --- Lindsey Buckingham)

#1418.  Wants Crudite (So Far Away --- Dire Straits)

#1419.  The Crudite (Not Fade Away --- Grateful Dead)

#1420.  Crudite Din (Holiday Inn --- Elton John)

 

#1421.  Tiffany Smiley (Baba O'Riley --- Grateful Dead)

#1422.  Markwayne (Cocaine --- Eric Clapton)

 

#1423.  Coco Elaine (Hello Again --- The Cars)

 

#1424.  Ill Campaigns (Still Remains --- Stone Temple Pilots)

 

#1425.  Crudite (Yesterday --- Paul McCartney)

 

#1426.  Roe Roe Roe Your Vote (Row Row Row Your Vote --- Ella Fitzgerald)

 

#1427.  Tate Reeves (Governor Blows) (Believe (Nobody Knows) --- My Morning Jacket)

 

#1428.  Eatin' Crudite (Surfin' U.S.A. --- Beach Boys)

 

#1429.  Mrs. Smiley (Mr. Smiley --- Poison)

 

#1430.  Mitch McConnell (Old MacDonald --- Unknown)

 

#1431.  Master Is Special (Master Of Puppets --- Metallica) 

#1432.  Crudite (Holiday --- Bee Gees)

 

#1433.  Fucked Up Ass Blake Masters (Fabulous Disaster --- Exodus)

 

#1434.  Mrs. Smiley (Mr. Crowley --- Ozzy Osbourne)

 

#1435.  Talk To Mark Meadows (Walk In The Shadows --- Queensryche)

 

#1436. Chris Kice (The Price -- Twisted Sister)

#1437.  Crudite (Stay Away --- Nirvana)

#1438.  Crudite (New Year's Day --- U2)

#1439.  One More Crudite Bite (One More Saturday Night --- Grateful Dead)

#1440.  The Crudite's Bad (The Crudite) (Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away) --- Motley Crue)

#1441.  Crudite (Say Say Say --- Paul McCartney & Michael Jackson)

#1442.  That Donald Trump Is... (All In The Name Of... Motley Crue)

#1443.  Comer Isn't Very Smart (Owner Of A Lonely Heart --- Yes)

#1444.  Mehmet Oz (Just Because --- Jane's Addiction)

#1445.  A Piece Of Shit From The Start (Total Eclipse Of The Heart --- Bonnie Tyler)

#1446.  J.D. (Lady --- Styx)

#1447.  J.D. Vance (My Romance --- Carly Simon)

#1448.  Donald Trump's Hair (Ya Mo B There --- Michael McDonald)

#1449.  Dixon, Tudor (Touch My Tooter --- Ween)

#1450.  J.D. (Lady --- Little River Band)

#1451.  J.D. Is Gay (Lay Lady Lay --- Bob Dylan)

#1452.  Tudor Dixon (Superstition --- Stevie Wonder)

#1453.  Richard Woods (Harry Hood --- Phish)

#1454.  Woods (Would --- Alice In Chains)

#1455.  Ted Budd (Blackbird --- The Beatles)

#1456.  Budd Is Far Right (Bloody Well Right --- Supertramp)

#1457.  Trump's Strange (La Grange --- ZZ Top)

#1458.  Ashley Kalus (Brokedown Palace --- Grateful Dead)

#1459.  Hung Cao (Right Now --- Van Halen)

#1460.  Hung Cao (Black Cow --- Steely Dan)

#1461.  Scott Jensen (Confusion --- Electric Light Orchestra)

#1462.  Meet Mehmet (Meet The Mets --- Ruth Roberts & Bill Katz)

#1463.  Bolduc (Holed Up --- The Raconteurs)

#1464.  Bolduc's Fucked up (Hold Your Head Up --- Argent)

#1465.  Vance Is A Cunt (Eminence Front --- The Who)

#1466.  Oh Mike Lindell (The First Noel --- Brian Wilson)

#1467.  A Fucking Assclown (The Final Countdown --- Europe)

#1468.  Kim Jong Un Will Fight (Afternoon Delight --- Starland Vocal Band)

#1469.  Majewski's Outta Line (Nobody's Fault But Mine --- Led Zeppelin)

#1470.  I Guess That's Why They Call Him A Jew (I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues --- Elton John)

#1471.  Crudite Plate (Runaway Train --- Soul Asylum)

#1472.  Roger Stone (Danger Zone --- Kenny Loggins)

#1473.  Roger Stone (Danger Zone --- The Ramones)

#1474.  Laxalt (Asshole --- Tom Petty)

#1475.  Trump Is A Bitch (Under The Bridge --- Red Hot Chili Peppers)

#1476.  Mark Meadows Loves Gay Porn (Every Rose Has A Thorn --- Poison)

#1477.  Kim Jong's Illin' (You Be Illin' --- Run DMC)

#1478.  Bad Roger Stone (Bad To The Bone --- George Thorogood & The Destroyers)

#1479.  Burt (Hurt --- Nine Inch Nails)

#1480.  Pate Is A Geek (Eight Days A Week --- The Beatles)

#1481.  Poor Sandy Smith (Poor Ellen Smith --- Billy Strings)

#1482.  Laxalt (Blackout --- Scorpions)

#1483.  Steve J. Scalise (Karma Police --- Radiohead)

#1484. Steve Scalise (Dream Police --- Cheap Trick)

#1485.  Teddy Cruz (Boggie Shoes --- KC & The Sunshine Band)

#1486. Ronchetti (Black Betty --- Metal Church)

#1487.  Joe O'Dea (Day By Day --- The Hooters)

#1488.  Tommy Tuberville (A View To A Kill --- Duran Duran) 

#1489.  Fuck You Trumpers (All You Zombies --- The Hooters)

#1490.  A. Biggs (War Pigs --- Black Sabbath)

#1491.  Rubio Ga Ga (Radio Ga Ga --- Queen)

#1492.  Moran (Old Man --- Neil Young)

#1493.  Trump's A Liar (Ring Of Fire --- Johnny Cash)

#1494.  Why Does Ivanka Blow (Where Do The Children Go --- The Hooters)

#1495.  Why Why, Gay Gay (Chris Sununu) (My My, Hey Hey (Out Of The Blue) --- Neil Young)

#1496.  Tonight Ivanka Masturbates For You (Tonight I Want To Celebrate With You --- My Morning Jacket)

#1497.  Marco A. Rubio (Turn Up The Radio --- Autograph)

#1498.  Tshibaka (Fuck You) (Axilla (Part II --- Phish)

#1499.  Sinning (Winning --- Santana)

#1500.  Nunes (Jane Says --- Jane's Addiction)

#1501.  (We Don't Want No) Kenneth Paxton (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction --- Rolling Stones)

#1502.  Asshole In Trump Tower... Stinking (Standing In The Shower... Thinking --- Jane's Addiction)

#1503.  Fuck Cooper (The Trooper --- Iron Maiden)

#1504.  Ganahl (Crank Call --- Billy Idol)

#1505.  Bannon (Love Gun --- Kiss)

#1506.  Marco Rubio's A Clown And A Retard (Me And Julio Down By The Schoolyard --- Paul Simon)

Please do not share this material with Senator Marco Rubio and/or former President Donald J. Trump.