#2759. Lance Wallnau Will Fuck You

JD Vance was on the outskirts of Pittburgh over the weekend.  He "piggy-backed" off televangelist preacher Lance Wallnau during a revival at the Monroevile Convention Center.

Many born-again Christians were spotted holding up signs.  

LANCE

LOVES

VANCE

Label me a cynic, but I think the Orange Prolapse came up with that snappy slogan all by himself.

For the love of Christ!  For the love of the holy ghost.  And for the love of D-g!

 

 

Lance Wallnau Will Fuck You
sonofsaf

A coup is outta line, insurrection crime
And the pink slime leaves an Orange Prolapse stain
Tiny mushroom bone, evangelicals prayin’
Toilet stall is a shitshow that’s insane

All the fuckin’ pain and sorrow and tits of Stormy D.
Trump he lied and whined ‘bout Tahoe and motorboatin’
He wants pornography gonna stop the steal and screw you
pastor whore that Lance Wallnau will fuck you

Stormy D’s tits and cunt deserved a love letter
Trump has a wig for hair that’s blowin’ on the dance floor
A coup’s the masterplan if you’re Republican
So let us stop the stealin’ and so much more…whore

All the fuckin’ pain and sorrow and tits of Stormy D.
Trump he lied and whined ‘bout Tahoe and motorboatin’
He wants pornography gonna stop the steal and screw you
pastor whore that Lance Wallnau will fuck you

 

Anyhow, I Love You
Guy Clark

I wish I had a dime for every bad time
But the bad times always seem to keep the change
You been all alone so you know what I'm sayin'
So when all you can recall is the pain

Just you wait until tomorrow when you wake up with me
at your side and find I haven't lied about nothin'
I wouldn't trade a tree for the way I feel about you
in the mornin', anyhow I love you

Everyday it gets just a little bit better
And half the gettin' there is knowin' where I been before
I'm sure you understand 'cause I ain't your first man
So when you feel like runnin' for the back door...don't

Just you wait until tomorrow when you wake up with me
at your side and find I haven't lied about nothin'
I wouldn't trade a tree for the way I feel about you
in the mornin', anyhow I love you

 

Meandering, story-telling lyrics often make for challenging parodies.   

To the best of my knowledge, Guy Clark never played the Burgh.  He passed away in 2016 at the age of 74.  His death came shortly before an Orange Prolapse was elected President of the United States.  Now in 2024, a most penetrating question will rear its ugly head.  Could SCROTUM POTUS become the next Grover Cleveland?

 

The Big Lie 100: (#1885)

#2566.  Vance (Chance --- Big Country)

#2567.  Donald Trump Ain't Devout (That's What It's All About --- Brooks & Dunn)

#2568.  Royce White (Love Bites --- Judas Priest)

#2569.  Royce Isn't White (Fight For Your Right --- Beastie Boys)

#2570.  Trump's A Cunt (Light My Love --- Greta Van Fleet)

#2571.  Vincent Fong (We Belong --- Pat Benatar)

#2572.  Fong's A Clown (Long Way Down --- Goo Goo Dolls)

#2573.  Vincent Fong In Trump Tower (All Along The Watchtower --- Grateful Dead)

#2574.  Red Lobster (Rock Lobster --- B-52's)

#2575.  Robert Jr. (Way Cool Jr. --- Ratt)

#2576.  Daines The Cunt (Chains Of Love --- B.B. King)

#2577.  John McGuire (Light My Fire --- The Doors)

#2578.  John McGuire (Start The Fire --- Metal Church)

#2579.  John McGuire (I'm On Fire --- Bruce Springsteen)

#2580.  Bill Lee (Billy --- Judge Smails)

#2581.  McGuire (Crossfire --- Stevie Ray Vaughan & Double Trouble)

#2582.  McGuire (Live Wire --- Motley Crue)

#2583.  McGuire (Hang Wire --- Pixies)

#2584.  Tim Sheehy (Faithfully --- Journey) 

#2585.  No Tim Sheehy (No Sympathy --- Bob Marley)

#2586.  Joseph McGuire (Trial By Fire --- Testament)

#2587.  Tim Sheehy (Thirty Three --- Smashing Pumpkins)

#2588.  Jared's A Jew (No One Like You --- Scorpions)

#2589.  Kicker Harrison Butker (The Mother of All Fuckers --- Brian Jonestown Massacre)

#2590.  McGuire (Hang Fire --- Rolling Stones)

#2591.  Fuck Harrison Butker (Hello From The Gutter --- Overkill)

#2592.  U.S. Jews (U.S. Blues --- Grateful Dead)

#2593.  Jeff Van Drew (Black And Blue --- Van Halen)

#2594.  Alex Jones (Game Of Thrones --- HBO)

#2595.  Ed Martin (The Curtain --- Phish)

#2596.  Trumpin' (Women --- Def Leppard)

#2597.  Mike Roman (Bad Omen --- Megadeth) 

#2598.  Trump Is A Clown (Farewell For Now --- Greta Van Fleet)

#2599.  Sam Brown (This Town --- Neil Young)

#2600.  Sam Brown (Showdown --- E.L.O.)

#2601.  Sam Brown (Ghost Town --- The Vaccines)

#2602.  Sam Brown's A Clown (Don't Let Me Down --- The Beatles)

#2603.  Lies Of Nancy Mace (Eyes Without A Face --- Billy Idol)

#2604.  Trump Romancer (Tiny Dancer --- Elton John)

#2605.  Downing (Drowning --- Radio Company)

#2606.  Orange Prolapsin' Fart (Listen To Your Heart --- Roxette)

#2607.  Donald's Dildo Toys (Come On Feel The Noize --- Quiet Riot)

#2608.  Trump Dumps Ain't A Crime (One Day At A Time --- Cristy Lane)

#2609.  All You Need Is Trump (All You Need Is Love ---The Beatles)

#2610.  O'Brien (O'Brien --- Seinfeld episode)

#2611.  Tenney Is A Whore (Penny On The Floor --- The Clarks)

#2612.  Trump Is Great (Born Too Late --- The Clarks)

#2613.  Gabe (Babe --- Styx)

#2614.  Doug Burgum's A Cunt (I Want A New Drug --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#2615.  Pastor John Mark Burns (As the World Burns --- Kreator)

#2616.  Deepfake (Jailbreak --- Anthrax)

#2617.  Buckhout (Blackout --- Scorpions)

#2618.  Deepfaker (Heartbreaker --- Pat Benatar)

#2619.  Donald Trump (Tainted Love --- Soft Cell)

#2620.  Donald Trump (Icky Thump --- White Stripes)

#2621.  Steve Daines (The Plains --- Wilco)

#2622.  Deepfaker (Heartbreaker --- Free)

#2623.  Trump's A Clown (All Right Now --- Queen w/ Paul Rodgers)

#2624.  Donald Trump Is Tragic (Listen To The Music --- Doobie Brothers)

#2625.  Greenwood (Falsehood --- Alpha Wolf)

#2626.  Orange Prolapse (Built To Last --- Grateful Dead)

#2627.  The Donald's A Clown From Florida (The Devil Went Down To Georgia --- Charlie Daniels Band) 

#2628.  Trump Dump (Love Dump --- Static-X)

#2629.  Missouri Doctor Bob Onder (Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder --- Dean Martin)

#2630.  Bobb (Job --- Iggy Pop & The Stooges)

#2631.  Kremer (Dreamer --- Supertramp)

#2632.  Amy Fuckin' Kremer (Jesus, My Redeemer --- Chris Tomlin)

#2633.  Amy Kremer (Jesus Screamer --- Sodom)

#2634.  Donald Trump Is Shitty (Isn't It A Pity --- My Morning Jacket)

#2635.  McGuire (Crossfire --- Judas Priest)

#2636.  Arizona Cunt Nancy Cottle (If I Could Make Love To A Bottle --- Weird Al Yankovic)

#2637.  Cottle Fuck (Bottled Up --- DEVO)

#2638.  Grothman (Loves The Orange Prolapse --- Caution: Do Not Stop On Tracks --- Grateful Dead)

#2639.  Crooks Will Kill (Looks That Kill --- Motley Crue)

#2640.  Priebus Is Fuckin' White (Jesus Is Just Alright --- Doobie Brothers)

#2641.  Priebus (Jesus --- Velvet Underground)

#2642.  He'll Defend Donald Reince Priebus (What A Friend We Have In Jesus --- Alan Jackson)

#2643.  Priebus Cuming From A Stormy Wet Dream (Jesus Doesn't Want Me For A Sunbeam --- Nirvana)

#2644.  Rubio (I Don't Know --- Beastie Boys)

#2645.  Cao (Pow --- Beastie Boys)

#2646.  Kamala (Shambala --- Beastie Boys)

#2647.  Priebus Is Red (Jesus Is Dead --- The Exploited)

#2648.  Usha Vance (In A Trance --- Malcolm Todd)

#2649.  Donald's Jism (Aneurysm --- Nirvana)

#2650.  Rubio (I Don't Know --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2651.  Mark Green (Irene --- Grateful Dead)

#2652.  Cheatle Is A Fuckin' Cunt (Needle And The Damage Done --- Neil Young)

#2653.  Kimberly Cheatle (Everyday People --- Sly & The Family Stone)

#2654.  Timmy (Timmy --- South Park)

#2655.  Tim Burchett's Dick (Is Not Long) (Don't Forget Me: When I'm Gone --- Glass Tiger)

#2656.  Donald's Dumpin' (Gets Ya Pumpin' --- Bob Seger)

#2657.  J.D. Vance (Army Ants --- Stone Temple Pilots)

#2658.  Vance, Motherfucker, Vance! (Dance, Motherfucker, Dance! --- Violent Femmes)

#2659.  J.D. Vance (And We Danced --- The Hooters)

#2660.  Bitch Forty-Five (Switch 625 --- Def Leppard)

#2661.  Trumpin', Dumpin', Feedin' (Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin' --- Journey)

#2662.  Nancy Mace (Off My Face --- Justin Bieber)

#2663.  The Trump Towers (The Small Hours --- Metallica)

#2664.  News Faker (Jawbreaker --- Judas Priest)

#2665.  The V.P. Vance (The Safety Dance --- Men Without Hats)

#2666.  Heap (Creep --- Stone Temple Pilots)

#2667.  Heap (Creep --- Radiohead)

#2668.  Make America Great Again (Make America Great Again --- Brian Kelley)

#2669. 'Merican Nation (Terrapin Station --- Grateful Dead)

#2670.  Stormy's Chest Is Plastic On Fake News (I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues --- Elton John) 

#2671.  Senator Vance (Shut Up And Dance --- Walk The Moon)

#2672.  America (Hysteria --- Def Leppard)

#2673.  Steele (Deal --- Grateful Dead)

#2674.  Shitshow Paula Stark (Rainbow In The Dark --- Dio)

#2675.  Paula A. Stark (Shot In The Dark --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2676.  David Shoar (He's A Whore --- Cheap Trick)

#2677.  Tim Walz (Big Balls --- AC/DC)

#2678.  Trump Fucks You (I Thank You --- Bonnie Raitt)

#2679.  Big Lies And Adin Ross (Behind The Crooked Cross --- Slayer)

#2680.  Priebus (Jesus -- Phil Thompson)

#2681.  The Big Lie (Frizzle Fry --- Primus)

#2682.  Michelle Morrow (Broken Arrow --- Grateful Dead)

#2683.  The Orange Prolapse Stain (The Last Waltz Refrain --- The Band)

#2684.  Roger Stone (I Alone --- Live)

#2685.  Orange Prolapse Stain (Hamburger Train --- Primus)

#2686.  We'll Sever Donald's Bone (You'll Never Walk Alone --- Liverpool Anthem)

#2687.  Tim Walz Inspires (Great Balls Of Fire --- Chris Isaak)

#2688.  Donald's Fat (My Friend Fats --- Primus)

#2689.  Paula Allene Stark (Lurking In The Dark --- King Diamond)

#2690.  Priebus Stop The Steal (Jesus Take The Wheel --- Carrie Underwood)

#2691.  Kennedy Is Old (Ecstasy Of Gold --- Metallica)

#2692.  Spartz (Hearts --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#2693.  Kremer (Dreamer --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2694.  Robert F. Kennedy (Don't Be my Enemy --- Wang Chung)

#2695.  Far-Out Liz Murrill (About A Girl --- Nirvana)

#2696.  Gabbard (Shattered --- Rolling Stones)

#2697.  Sparks (Sparks --- Coldplay)

#2698.  Michael Sparks (Tiny Spark --- American Hi-Fi)

#2699.  Let's Stop The Stealing (That's How I Feeling --- Jack White)

#2700.  Robert Morris (Wordless Chorus --- My Morning Jacket)

#2701.  Gabbard (Shattered --- Dokken)

#2702.  McCormick (Ton Of Bricks --- Metal Church)

#2703.  Go To Hell (Top Yourself --- The Raconteurs)

#2704.  Taylor Greene (Stella Blue --- Grateful Dead)

#2705.  Peter Thiel (Pittsburgh Steel --- Warren Zeiders)

#2706.  Peter Thiel (Dipped In Steel --- Flaming Lips)

#2707.  Mahomes (Them Bones --- Alice In Chains)

#2708.  Thiel (Deal --- Grateful Dead)

#2709.  J.D. Vance (Take A Chance --- Eric Clapton) 

#2710.  J.D. Vance (Song And Dance --- John Cafferty & The Beaver Brown Band)

#2711.  An Ass: Donald Trump's The Orange Prolapse (He's Back: The Man Behind The Mask --- Alice Cooper)

#2712.  Fox News And Sean Hannity (The Frayed Ends Of Sanity --- Metallica)

#2713.  McDevotion (Sweet Emotion --- Aerosmith)

#2714.  J.D. Vance (Zero Chance --- Soundgarden)

#2715.  Jew (True --- Spandau Ballet)

#2716.  Donald Trump (One Pump Chump --- Steel Panther)

#2717.  Deb Fischer (Well-Wisher --- Single Mothers)

#2718.  O'Grady (Lady --- Styx)

#2719.  Insurrection (Operation --- Circle Jerks)

#2720.  Kushner Jew (Karma Stew --- Circle Jerks)

#2721.  Laura Loomer's In The White House (There's A Tumor In the White House --- Dan Mangan)

#2722.  Sean Hannity (My Sanity --- Bad Religion)

#2723.  Priebus, Scam And Fraud (Jesus, Lamb Of God --- Phil & Victor Thompson)

#2724.  Donald Trump's A Cunt And... (Gimme All Your Lovin' --- ZZ Top)

#2725.  Trump's A Cunt (War Begun --- My Morning Jacket)

#2726.  Kushner Screw (Under You --- Foo Fighters)

#2727.  Loomer's Bullshit (Rumor Has It --- Reba McEntire)

#2728.  Insurrection! (Strangulation! --- My Morning Jacket)

#2729.  Fight (Fight --- The Cure)

#2730.  Donald Is Fuckin' Inbred (Can't Get It Out Of My Head --- Electric Light Orchestra) 

#2731.  Tim DeFoor (Amateur --- Aimee Mann)

#2732.  Fight Fight Fight (Fight Fight Fight --- Riot)

#2733.  Hey Routh (Hey Jude --- The Beatles)

#2734.  Crank's Small (Crank Call --- Billy Idol)

#2735.  Trump Smells (Peace Sells --- Megadeth)

#2736.  Moore (More --- Simply Red)

#2737.  Routh (Ruth --- Glen Campbell)

#2738.  Moore... (More... Wilco)

#2739.  Wesley Routh (Baby Ruth --- John Prine)

#2740.  Liar (Fighter --- Jon Kahn)

#2741.  Kushner's A Jew (I Melt With You --- Modern English)

#2742.  Sheehy (Coffee --- David Allan Coe)

#2743.  Stormy's Chest (All The Best --- My Morning Jacket)

#2744.  Routh (Ruth --- The Toadies)

#2745.  Loomer's A Cunt (Rumor Of Love --- Berlin)

#2746.  Laura Loomer (There's A Rumor --- The August Empire)

#2747.  Ohio's Springfield Haitians (Buffalo Springfield Again --- Neil Young)

#2748.  Laura E. Loomer (I Heard A Rumour --- Bananarama)

#2749.  Springfield (Springfield --- Anathema)

#2750.  Reschenthaler's Crazy (Billion Dollar Babies --- Alice Cooper)

#2751.  Higgins (Big Guns --- Ruelle)

#2752.  Schneider (Spider --- They Might Be Giants)

#2753.  Lotter (Strutter --- Kiss)

#2754.  James Braid (Afraid --- Willie Nelson)

#2755.  Joke And A Cunt (Soak Up The Sun --- Sheryl Crow)

#2756.  'Cause The Donald Is (When The Circus Comes --- Phish)

#2757.  James Braid (Afraid --- Neko Case)

#2758.  Donald Trump's A Clown, JD's Too (It's All Over Now, Baby Blue --- Grateful Dead)

#2759.  Lance Wallnau Will Fuck You (Anyhow, I Love You --- Guy Clark)

Please do not share this material with Lance Wallnau, JD Vance, and/or former President Donald J. Trump.