#2707. Mahomes

I watched the NFL opener last night.  Chiefs beat the Ravens 27-20 in a thriller.  

But of far greater importance, former BFF's Taylor Swift and Brittany Mahomes sat separately.  Taylor's upset because Brittany "liked" a social media post from the Orange Prolapse.

 

Swift is on the record for supporting Kamala Harris.  So let the drama commence and the madness begin.

This latest celebrity feud seems a little staged.  Seriously, just the notion of spending time and effort analyzing all the sub-plots.  What if Pat Mahomes doesn't throw the ball to Travis Kelce?  The fantasy ramifications alone!  #vomit

I'm guessing a pina colada.

A patriotic dumparooni.

 

 

Talk about a string of uninspired, miniscule Dumps.  SAD!

Speaking of Trump, the Orange Prolapse is coming to Smithton, PA later this month (about 30 minutes South of the Burgh).  Farm Baby Farm!

 

 

Mahomes
sonofsaf

Aaah! Aaah! Aaah! Aaah!

Brittany Mahomes you see
So gay her porn pussy she’ll shave

Tiny mushroom bone, always fucked up an
Asshole Brittany Mahomes

Aaah! Aaah! Aaaaaaaaah!

Big lies insurrection’s a crime
You’ll see the love from Stormy D.

Tiny mushroom bone, always fucked up an
Asshole Brittany Mahomes

Bad Jew wet dream for you
Big lie any wonder kids die

Tiny mushroom bone, always fucked up an
Asshole Brittany-Ma…
Tiny mushroom bone, always fucked up an
Asshole Brittany-Ma…
Tiny mushroom bone, always fucked up an
Asshole Brittany Mahomes

 

Them Bones
Alice In Chains

Aaah! Aaah! Aaah! Aaah!

I believe them bones are me
Some say we're born into the grave

I feel so alone, gonna end up a
Big ole pile of them bones

Aaah! Aaah! Aaaaaaaaah!

Dust rise right on over my time
Empty fossil of the new scene

I feel so alone, gonna end up a
Big ole pile of them bones

Toll due bad dream come true
I lie dead gone under red sky

I feel so alone, gonna end up a
Big ole pile of them...
I feel so alone, gonna end up a
Big ole pile of them...
I feel so alone, gonna end up a
Big ole pile of them bones

 

My second parody of "Them Bones."  A few years ago, I penned #678.  Burt Jones. (regarding the Lt. Governor of Georgia)

I also wrote a parody about Brittany's husband... Chiefs QB Patrick Mahomes.

"Crusty Loads, Pat Mahomes" --- a filth laden version of the John Denver classic "Take Me Home, Country Roads."

 

 

From 1990 to the present, AIC has roostered the Burgh a grand total of 7 times.

 

Alice In Chains:

7-21-93, Star Lake Amphitheater Burgettstown, PA (Lollapalooza - Fishbone stole the show)

8-17-19, KeyBank Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA (opened for Korn)

The Big Lie 100: (#1835)

#2566.  Vance (Chance --- Big Country)

#2567.  Donald Trump Ain't Devout (That's What It's All About --- Brooks & Dunn)

#2568.  Royce White (Love Bites --- Judas Priest)

#2569.  Royce Isn't White (Fight For Your Right --- Beastie Boys)

#2570.  Trump's A Cunt (Light My Love --- Greta Van Fleet)

#2571.  Vincent Fong (We Belong --- Pat Benatar)

#2572.  Fong's A Clown (Long Way Down --- Goo Goo Dolls)

#2573.  Vincent Fong In Trump Tower (All Along The Watchtower --- Grateful Dead)

#2574.  Red Lobster (Rock Lobster --- B-52's)

#2575.  Robert Jr. (Way Cool Jr. --- Ratt)

#2576.  Daines The Cunt (Chains Of Love --- B.B. King)

#2577.  John McGuire (Light My Fire --- The Doors)

#2578.  John McGuire (Start The Fire --- Metal Church)

#2579.  John McGuire (I'm On Fire --- Bruce Springsteen)

#2580.  Bill Lee (Billy --- Judge Smails)

#2581.  McGuire (Crossfire --- Stevie Ray Vaughan & Double Trouble)

#2582.  McGuire (Live Wire --- Motley Crue)

#2583.  McGuire (Hang Wire --- Pixies)

#2584.  Tim Sheehy (Faithfully --- Journey) 

#2585.  No Tim Sheehy (No Sympathy --- Bob Marley)

#2586.  Joseph McGuire (Trial By Fire --- Testament)

#2587.  Tim Sheehy (Thirty Three --- Smashing Pumpkins)

#2588.  Jared's A Jew (No One Like You --- Scorpions)

#2589.  Kicker Harrison Butker (The Mother of All Fuckers --- Brian Jonestown Massacre)

#2590.  McGuire (Hang Fire --- Rolling Stones)

#2591.  Fuck Harrison Butker (Hello From The Gutter --- Overkill)

#2592.  U.S. Jews (U.S. Blues --- Grateful Dead)

#2593.  Jeff Van Drew (Black And Blue --- Van Halen)

#2594.  Alex Jones (Game Of Thrones --- HBO)

#2595.  Ed Martin (The Curtain --- Phish)

#2596.  Trumpin' (Women --- Def Leppard)

#2597.  Mike Roman (Bad Omen --- Megadeth) 

#2598.  Trump Is A Clown (Farewell For Now --- Greta Van Fleet)

#2599.  Sam Brown (This Town --- Neil Young)

#2600.  Sam Brown (Showdown --- E.L.O.)

#2601.  Sam Brown (Ghost Town --- The Vaccines)

#2602.  Sam Brown's A Clown (Don't Let Me Down --- The Beatles)

#2603.  Lies Of Nancy Mace (Eyes Without A Face --- Billy Idol)

#2604.  Trump Romancer (Tiny Dancer --- Elton John)

#2605.  Downing (Drowning --- Radio Company)

#2606.  Orange Prolapsin' Fart (Listen To Your Heart --- Roxette)

#2607.  Donald's Dildo Toys (Come On Feel The Noize --- Quiet Riot)

#2608.  Trump Dumps Ain't A Crime (One Day At A Time --- Cristy Lane)

#2609.  All You Need Is Trump (All You Need Is Love ---The Beatles)

#2610.  O'Brien (O'Brien --- Seinfeld episode)

#2611.  Tenney Is A Whore (Penny On The Floor --- The Clarks)

#2612.  Trump Is Great (Born Too Late --- The Clarks)

#2613.  Gabe (Babe --- Styx)

#2614.  Doug Burgum's A Cunt (I Want A New Drug --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#2615.  Pastor John Mark Burns (As the World Burns --- Kreator)

#2616.  Deepfake (Jailbreak --- Anthrax)

#2617.  Buckhout (Blackout --- Scorpions)

#2618.  Deepfaker (Heartbreaker --- Pat Benatar)

#2619.  Donald Trump (Tainted Love --- Soft Cell)

#2620.  Donald Trump (Icky Thump --- White Stripes)

#2621.  Steve Daines (The Plains --- Wilco)

#2622.  Deepfaker (Heartbreaker --- Free)

#2623.  Trump's A Clown (All Right Now --- Queen w/ Paul Rodgers)

#2624.  Donald Trump Is Tragic (Listen To The Music --- Doobie Brothers)

#2625.  Greenwood (Falsehood --- Alpha Wolf)

#2626.  Orange Prolapse (Built To Last --- Grateful Dead)

#2627.  The Donald's A Clown From Florida (The Devil Went Down To Georgia --- Charlie Daniels Band) 

#2628.  Trump Dump (Love Dump --- Static-X)

#2629.  Missouri Doctor Bob Onder (Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder --- Dean Martin)

#2630.  Bobb (Job --- Iggy Pop & The Stooges)

#2631.  Kremer (Dreamer --- Supertramp)

#2632.  Amy Fuckin' Kremer (Jesus, My Redeemer --- Chris Tomlin)

#2633.  Amy Kremer (Jesus Screamer --- Sodom)

#2634.  Donald Trump Is Shitty (Isn't It A Pity --- My Morning Jacket)

#2635.  McGuire (Crossfire --- Judas Priest)

#2636.  Arizona Cunt Nancy Cottle (If I Could Make Love To A Bottle --- Weird Al Yankovic)

#2637.  Cottle Fuck (Bottled Up --- DEVO)

#2638.  Grothman (Loves The Orange Prolapse --- Caution: Do Not Stop On Tracks --- Grateful Dead)

#2639.  Crooks Will Kill (Looks That Kill --- Motley Crue)

#2640.  Priebus Is Fuckin' White (Jesus Is Just Alright --- Doobie Brothers)

#2641.  Priebus (Jesus --- Velvet Underground)

#2642.  He'll Defend Donald Reince Priebus (What A Friend We Have In Jesus --- Alan Jackson)

#2643.  Priebus Cuming From A Stormy Wet Dream (Jesus Doesn't Want Me For A Sunbeam --- Nirvana)

#2644.  Rubio (I Don't Know --- Beastie Boys)

#2645.  Cao (Pow --- Beastie Boys)

#2646.  Kamala (Shambala --- Beastie Boys)

#2647.  Priebus Is Red (Jesus Is Dead --- The Exploited)

#2648.  Usha Vance (In A Trance --- Malcolm Todd)

#2649.  Donald's Jism (Aneurysm --- Nirvana)

#2650.  Rubio (I Don't Know --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2651.  Mark Green (Irene --- Grateful Dead)

#2652.  Cheatle Is A Fuckin' Cunt (Needle And The Damage Done --- Neil Young)

#2653.  Kimberly Cheatle (Everyday People --- Sly & The Family Stone)

#2654.  Timmy (Timmy --- South Park)

#2655.  Tim Burchett's Dick (Is Not Long) (Don't Forget Me: When I'm Gone --- Glass Tiger)

#2656.  Donald's Dumpin' (Gets Ya Pumpin' --- Bob Seger)

#2657.  J.D. Vance (Army Ants --- Stone Temple Pilots)

#2658.  Vance, Motherfucker, Vance! (Dance, Motherfucker, Dance! --- Violent Femmes)

#2659.  J.D. Vance (And We Danced --- The Hooters)

#2660.  Bitch Forty-Five (Switch 625 --- Def Leppard)

#2661.  Trumpin', Dumpin', Feedin' (Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin' --- Journey)

#2662.  Nancy Mace (Off My Face --- Justin Bieber)

#2663.  The Trump Towers (The Small Hours --- Metallica)

#2664.  News Faker (Jawbreaker --- Judas Priest)

#2665.  The V.P. Vance (The Safety Dance --- Men Without Hats)

#2666.  Heap (Creep --- Stone Temple Pilots)

#2667.  Heap (Creep --- Radiohead)

#2668.  Make America Great Again (Make America Great Again --- Brian Kelley)

#2669. 'Merican Nation (Terrapin Station --- Grateful Dead)

#2670.  Stormy's Chest Is Plastic On Fake News (I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues --- Elton John) 

#2671.  Senator Vance (Shut Up And Dance --- Walk The Moon)

#2672.  America (Hysteria --- Def Leppard)

#2673.  Steele (Deal --- Grateful Dead)

#2674.  Shitshow Paula Stark (Rainbow In The Dark --- Dio)

#2675.  Paula A. Stark (Shot In The Dark --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2676.  David Shoar (He's A Whore --- Cheap Trick)

#2677.  Tim Walz (Big Balls --- AC/DC)

#2678.  Trump Fucks You (I Thank You --- Bonnie Raitt)

#2679.  Big Lies And Adin Ross (Behind The Crooked Cross --- Slayer)

#2680.  Priebus (Jesus -- Phil Thompson)

#2681.  The Big Lie (Frizzle Fry --- Primus)

#2682.  Michelle Morrow (Broken Arrow --- Grateful Dead)

#2683.  The Orange Prolapse Stain (The Last Waltz Refrain --- The Band)

#2684.  Roger Stone (I Alone --- Live)

#2685.  Orange Prolapse Stain (Hamburger Train --- Primus)

#2686.  We'll Sever Donald's Bone (You'll Never Walk Alone --- Liverpool Anthem)

#2687.  Tim Walz Inspires (Great Balls Of Fire --- Chris Isaak)

#2688.  Donald's Fat (My Friend Fats --- Primus)

#2689.  Paula Allene Stark (Lurking In The Dark --- King Diamond)

#2690.  Priebus Stop The Steal (Jesus Take The Wheel --- Carrie Underwood)

#2691.  Kennedy Is Old (Ecstasy Of Gold --- Metallica)

#2692.  Spartz (Hearts --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#2693.  Kremer (Dreamer --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2694.  Robert F. Kennedy (Don't Be my Enemy --- Wang Chung)

#2695.  Far-Out Liz Murrill (About A Girl --- Nirvana)

#2696.  Gabbard (Shattered --- Rolling Stones)

#2697.  Sparks (Sparks --- Coldplay)

#2698.  Michael Sparks (Tiny Spark --- American Hi-Fi)

#2699.  Let's Stop The Stealing (That's How I Feeling --- Jack White)

#2700.  Robert Morris (Wordless Chorus --- My Morning Jacket)

#2701.  Gabbard (Shattered --- Dokken)

#2702.  McCormick (Ton Of Bricks --- Metal Church)

#2703.  Go To Hell (Top Yourself --- The Raconteurs)

#2704.  Taylor Greene (Stella Blue --- Grateful Dead)

#2705.  Peter Thiel (Pittsburgh Steel --- Warren Zeiders)

#2706.  Peter Thiel (Dipped In Steel --- Flaming Lips)

#2707.  Mahomes (Them Bones --- Alice In Chains)

Please do not share this material with Brittany Mahomesl and/or former President Donald J. Trump.