West Virginia politician Riley Moore recently scored a highly coveted endorsement from the Orange Prolapse.
Congratulations!
Riley Moore and JD Vance prep their thumbs for an act of "mutually assured insertion." |
Much like JD Vance from neighboring Ohio, Moore is 100% pro-life.
Rape? Fuck you. Incest? Fuck you. Life of the mother? You die. Or in this case, fuck'n die already.
His wife and kids must be very proud of daddy.
The Rachel Carson Bridge is known for its stunning contrast. |
That last T-Dump is known as "Market Square's Revenge." I've only performed a "cursory fecal analysis," but it definitely looks like the same culprit. I dunno. You tell me.
That alley next to the Oyster House has been getting mercilessly pummeled as of late.
In other news, the Pittsburgh City Paper Awards show is tonight at Stage AE. Rumor has it that the reclusive yinzer known as "Trump Dump" will be signing autographs in the elevator. Though his appearance and cooperation will probably be dependent on whether they allow attendees to go upstairs.
Moore
sonofsaf
Trump ain’t a king
Hold the line
Stromy g-strings
Outta line
Ivanka Kushner’s a Jew
And an affront
Moore is a cunt
Golden showers and wet dreams
Lacks the smarts and two times
Donald has flings
Was Stormy in Tahoe a crime?
Ivanka Kushner’s a Jew
And an affront
Moore is a cunt
More
Simply Red
You've had your flings
I've had mine
You've grown your wings
I've flown mine
The only way out is to
Give you more love
More of my love
Not a girl of my dreams
But two hearts and two minds
The strain that brings
Is ours until the end of time
The only way out is to
Give you more love
More of my love
According to my research, Simply Red might be Simply Orange... and possibly inbred. Much like the Orange Prolapse.
Simply Red has never played the Burgh. The second I learned of this, I knew I'd need to get over it, summon the courage, and move on.