Well, well, well.
Well, Mason and I did not get into Billy Joel at PNC Park last night.
Bob Nutting? Pirates owner? Hillbilly billionaire? Wheeling friend? Where the fuck were you? How about a little help?
It's the first time we've been rejected since... well, I can't remember. Maybe tonight we'll make a sign.
So we drank a (plastic) bottle of red and listened outside along the Allegheny River. No harm no foul.
Just for the record, I've parodied 4/5 of last night's encores... #86. You May Be Right, #147. Big Shot, #391. Uptown Girl, and We Didn't Start The Fire. The only one missing was "It's Still Rock and Roll To Me." Not too shabby if I don't say so myself.
Regardless, Donald Trump is a human clown.
As of this morning, the media is framing the "raid" on Mar-A-Lago as relating to the nuclear codes. I think it's reasonable to assume, that at some point, Trump "suggestively ordered" or "expressively mentioned" the prospect of a tactical nuclear strike on Iran. Likely in a formal Oval Office setting. But was overruled and fears the optics of the official narrative being exposed.
Also, I wouldn't be entirely shocked if this whole thing has something to do with a Trump desire/failed attempt to utilize the cellular Presidential terrorism alert system. Considering his reckless penchant for twitter, mass information dissemination, and relentless attempts to frame every hypothetical and real world narrative... it's kinda naive to assume the notion would've never popped in his head.
Human Clown
sonofsaf
Well that Donald Trump’s a human clown
In Manhattan or a Florida town
Insurrection is a big league crime
Out of the norm
Way outta line
Well his daughter-wife’s a stupid dumb whore
Jared Kushner’s always wantin’ more
'Cause Lake Tahoe was a porno store
Stormy romance
Very hardcore
And that Donald Trump’s a human clown
But that forty five’s a fucking clown
And that Donald Trump’s so fucking gay
Well that Donald Trump’s a human clown
Who's deserving of some ground and pound
Melania has a twat to shave
Pubes to discard
Hair she won’t save
So America will build a Great Wall
And the immigrants will climb it and fall
Stormy Daniels wasn’t a big deal
Mirrors and smoke
Adulterous feel
And that Donald Trump’s a human clown
But his Viagra’s in the lost and found
With no hard-on Donald cannot play
Pretty wild 1-6 Proud Boys got caught
Fire and fury which the Oath Keepers wrought
And they’re espousing too much critical race
The Orange Prolapse needs to be put in his place
Well that Donald Trump’s a human clown
Total retard with a syndrome down
But I wonder if he’s really gay
'Cause that Donald Trump is fucking gay
And that Donald Trump’s a fucking clown
Allentown
Billy Joel
Well we're living here in Allentown
And they're closing all the factories down
Out in Bethlehem they're killing time
Filling out forms
Standing in line
Well our fathers fought the Second World War
Spent their weekends on the Jersey Shore
Met our mothers in the USO
Asked them to dance
Danced with them slow
And we're living here in Allentown
But the restlessness was handed down
And it's getting very hard to stay
Well we're waiting here in Allentown
For the Pennsylvania we never found
For the promises our teachers gave
If we worked hard
If we behaved
So the graduations hang on the wall
But they never really helped us at all
No they never taught us what was real
Iron and coke
And chromium steel
And we're waiting here in Allentown
But they've taken all the coal from the ground
And the union people crawled away
Every child had a pretty good shot
To get at least as far as their old man got
But something happened on the way to that place
They threw an American flag in our face
Well I'm living here in Allentown
And it's hard to keep a good man down
But I won't be getting up today
And it's getting very hard to stay
And we're living here in Allentown
Easily one of my favorite Billy Joel songs. Allentown! And not just because I'm a Pennsylvania resident. The tune tells a story of immeasurable significance. Crazy to think it was released 40 years ago back in 1982. At the time, I was 12 years old... and steeped in pro wrestling.
Billy Joel:
3-4-99, Civic Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
2-21-14, Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, PA
7-1-16, PNC Park, Pittsburgh, PA
The Big Lie 100: (#574)
#1301. Wittman (Roxanne --- The Police)
#1302. Doctor Oz Is Gay (Watch The Children Pray --- Metal Church)
#1303. Abortion (Black Hole Sun --- Soundgarden)
#1304. Abortion (Distortion --- Overkill)#1305. Alito's World (Torpedo Girl --- Kiss)
#1306. Trump's My Enemy (Flesh For Fantasy --- Billy Idol)
#1307. Kushner Is A Jew (Breaking Us In Two --- Joe Jackson)
#1308. Wittman (Hitman --- Metal Church)
#1309. Red Alito (Red Mosquito --- Pearl Jam)
#1310. The Farts Of Thomas Cole (The Heart Of Rock and Roll --- Huey Lewis & The News)
#1311. Even Joe Gruters (Even The Losers --- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)
#1312. Joe Gruters Screw (Computer Blue --- Prince)
#1313. Meadows (Meadows --- Joe Walsh)
#1314. McCarthy's Got No Soul (You Can't Stop Rock'n'Roll --- Twisted Sister)
#1315. Thomas Cole (Heart & Soul --- Huey Lewis & The News)
#1316. Mark Meadows (Domino --- Van Morrison)
#1317. Thomas Cole Has No Regrets (Rock'n'Roll Never Forgets --- Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band)
#1318. Meadows Really Blows (Steady As She Goes --- The Raconteurs)
#1319. Kristi Noem's, Cunt Explodes (Take Me Home, Country Roads --- John Denver)
#1320. Kristina Blackout (The Sun Will Come Out --- Annie)
#1321. The Trumpers (The Numbers --- Radiohead)
#1322. Hern's A Bitch (Burn The Witch --- Queens Of The Stone Age)
#1323. Noem's An Ass (Home At Last --- Steely Dan)
#1324. Huckabee (Faithfully --- Journey)
#1325. Herschel Walker (I'm A Rocker --- Judas Priest)
#1326. Hern's The Fuck To Blame (Burning Like A Flame --- Dokken)
#1328. Donald Trump's A Piece Of Shit (I'm A Little Rocket Ship --- Cracker)
#1329. Kelley Rat (Smelly Cat --- Phoebe Buffay)
#1330. He's Mark Green (I'm Eighteen --- Alice Cooper)
#1331. Nunn Is So Gay (One Of These Days --- Pink Floyd)
#1332. Nunn (One --- Three Dog Night)
#1333. Donald Trump Is Fucking Gay (Living In The U.S.A. --- Steve Miller)
#1334. Nunn (One --- Metallica)
#1335. Cline (Time --- Alan Parsons Project)
#1336. Hal Rogers, Fat Fuck (Like Father, Like Son --- Exodus)
#1337. Huckabee (Suddenly --- Bee Gees)
#1338. Face Mullin (Space Truckin' --- Deep Purple)
#1339. He's Jim Pillen (You Be Illin' --- Run DMC)
#1340. Steve Bannon (Rhiannon --- Fleetwood Mac)
#1341. Janae Is A Shamp (Lady Is A Tramp --- Tony Bennett)
#1342. Scott Perry Will Fuck You (The Very Thought Of You --- Rod Stewart)
#1343. Scantlebury Suicide (Mandatory Suicide --- Slayer)
#1344. Yost Is Toast (Coast to Coast --- Scorpions)
#1345. Masters (Bastard --- Motley Crue)
#1346. Mark Lamb (Burndt Jamb --- Weezer)
#1347. Ivanka! (Ah! Leah! --- Donnie Iris)
#1348. Herschel's Pain (Purple Rain --- Prince)
#1349. You God Damn Jew (Suite Madame Blue --- Styx)
#1350. Lake Will Not Deliver (Take Me To The River --- Grateful Dead)
#1351. Lake's A Fucking Cunt (Take It On The Run --- REO Speedwagon)
#1352. Jew (You --- Radiohead)
#1353. Hair Hair (There There --- Radiohead)
#1354. Trump Is King Critical Race (Everything In Its Right Place --- Radiohead)
#1355. Russell Fry (High & Dry --- Radiohead)
#1356. Lindell (That Smell --- Lynyrd Skynyrd)
#1357. Scantlebury (Morning Glory --- Oasis)
#1358. Daniel Cox (Cleveland Rocks --- Presidents Of The United States Of America)
#1359. Cornyn Has Lied (Thorn In My Pride --- Black Crowes)
#1360. Blake Will Fuck You (Take Me With U --- Prince)
#1361. Tim Walberg (Jitterbug --- Charlie Daniels Band)
#1362. Donald Trump's A Fucking Whore (25 or 6 to 4 --- Chicago)
#1363. Mike Lindell (Rebel Yell --- Billy Idol)
#1364. Dan Cox Wants Anal (She Talks To Angels --- Black Crowes)
#1365. DeWine (Outshined --- Soundgarden)
#1366. Lotter (Daughter --- Pearl Jam)
#1367. Fry Is A Whore (Die By The Sword --- Slayer)
#1368. Meet Mike DeWine (Sweet Child 'O Mine --- Guns'n'Roses)
#1369. Gaetz Is A Freak (Eight Days A Week --- The Beatles)
#1370. Tudor (Shooter --- Waylon Jennings)
#1371. Donahue (Black and Blue --- Van Halen)
#1372. He's Eli Crane (I Can't Explain --- The Who)
#1373. Crane (Rain --- The Beatles)
#1380. Rusty Bowers (April Showers --- King's X)
#1381. Lake's An Ass (Take It Back --- Pink Floyd)
#1382. Schmitt Show (Sit There --- Crumbsuckers)
#1383. Diehl Is Gay (Steal Away --- Robbie Dupree)
#1384. Richard Mack's Whiter (Paperback Writer --- The Beatles)
#1385. Geoff Diehl (Bone Meal --- GWAR)
#1386. Diehl Is Gay (Steal Away --- Ozzy Osbourne)
#1387. Adam Steen (Dancing Queen --- ABBA)
#1388. David Farnsworth (For What It's Worth --- Buffalo Springfield)
#1389. Finchum Is Scum (Kingdom Of Come --- Soundgarden)
#1390. Ted Cruz Is A Clown (Bad News Comes To Town --- Neil Young)
#1391. Emmer Bites (Tremor Christ --- Pearl Jam)
#1392. R. Kleefisch Is A Retard (When You Wish Upon A Star --- Olivia Newton-John)
#1393. Trump's A Clown (All Right Now --- Free)
#1394. Levy (Easy --- The Commodores)
#1395. Chuck Gray (Birthday --- The Beatles)
#1396. Fucking You Is Eli Crane (Rock You Like A Hurricane --- Scorpions)
#1397. Liar Testify (Fire In The Sky --- Ozzy Osbourne)
#1398. Human Clown (Allentown --- Billy Joel)
Please do not share this material with Billy Joel and/or former President Donald J. Trump.
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