#2789. Donald Trump Is Gay

JD Vance was in the Burgh yesterday for an afternoon appearance at the Pennsylvanian on Liberty Ave.  He was surrounded by adoring fans... and a seemingly endless array of Trump Dumps.  I did not attend.

A random woman asked me if I was going to the rally and I replied, "No, unfortunately I have other plans.  Gonna head home and chew on tin foil."

Vance came on stage to Merle Haggard's "America First."  Hey, maybe that's an optimal solution for all those lawsuits Trump has incurred for stealing the songs of famous musicians.  Simply use the music of the dead.  Haggard passed away from pneumonia in 2016 on his 79th birthday.

As far as I'm concerned, there can be only one Merle. (an excerpt from the prologue of Negative Feedback Loop).

I wrestled with the choice of naming this parody "Donald Is Gay" (Daw-aw-nold Is Gay) but settled on "Donald Trump Is Gay."  The latter is technically off by one syllable.  But it just sounds better.  More triumphantly declarative.

 

 

Donald Trump Is Gay
sonofsaf

Trump’s a clown some fucked up hair
Mushroom dick just please don’t stare
Walz and tampons will win
Clown from hell Trump Vodka spill
A Diet Coke disaster
Walz and tampons will win

Fisting in arrears
Stinkin’ dope grandpap’s a smear
Very unkind
A pink slime ass creampie

Donald Trump is gay
He’s such a bitch-cunt
Ivanka Kushner’s got some bling
Bud Light’s a fine wine
Ivanka Kushner is a pain
Far right the Trump train
Donald Trump is gay

Donald’s hair if you care
Is inbred, daughter-wife is randy
MAGA cunt-ho they defend
Lil’ cock in a whore
Not hardcore. ‘Cause The Donald’s a queer
Electioneering’s pretend

His coup d’etat plan’s Be Best
He’s motor boating Stormy’s chest
As the country cries for pink slime ass creampies

Donald Trump is gay
(He’s such a bitch-cunt)
Ivanka Kushner’s got some bling
(Don’t free Palestine)
Ivanka Kushner is a pain
(Far right the Trump train)
Donald Trump is gay

Kushner god, Jared prays, kosher way, on display
An Arkansan Cotton: “Tom, pickin' all day.”
Trump is gay
Donald Trump is gay
Donald Trump is gay
The Donald is gay

Donald’s hair if you care
Is inbred, daughter-wife is randy
MAGA cunt-ho they defend
Lil’ cock in a whore
Not hardcore. ‘Cause The Donald’s a queer
Electioneering’s pretend

His coup d’etat plan’s Be Best
He’s motor boating Stormy’s chest
As the country cries for pink slime ass creampies
Donald Trump is gay

Donald Trump is gay
(He’s such a bitch-cunt)
Ivanka Kushner’s got some bling
(Don’t free Palestine)
Ivanka Kushner is a pain
(Far right the Trump train)
Donald Trump is gay

 

What Would You Say
Dave Matthews Band

Up and down the puppies' hair
Fleas and ticks jump everywhere
'Cause of original sin
Down the hill fell Jack and Jill
And you came tumbling after
'Cause of original sin

Rip away the tears
Drink a hope to happy years
And you may find
A lifetime's passed you by

What would you say?
Don't drop the big one
If you a monkey on a string
Don't cut my lifeline
If you a doggie on a chain
Don't bite the mailman
What would you say?

I was there when the bear
Ate his head, thought it was a candy
Everyone goes in the end
Knock, knock on the door
Who's it for? There's nobody in here
Look in the mirror, my friend

I don't understand at best
I cannot speak for all the rest
In the morning rise a lifetime's passed me by

What would you say?
(don't drop the big one)
If you a monkey on a string
(Don't cut my life line)
If you a doggie on a chain
(Don't bite the mailman)
What would you say?

Every dog has its day, every day has its way
Of being forgotten: "Mom, it's my birthday."
Would you say
What would you say?
What would you say?
"What could you say?"

I was there when the bear
Ate his head, thought it was a candy
Everyone goes in the end
Knock, knock on the door
Who's it for? There's nobody in here
Look in the mirror, my friend

I don't understand at best
Cannot speak for all the rest
Morning rise a lifetime's passed me by
What would you say?

What would you say?
(don't' drop the big one)
If you a monkey on a string
(Don't cut my life line)
If you a doggie on a chain
(Don't bite the mailman)
What would you say?

Always a strong opener.  Great tune.  One of his best. 

Tricky, stilted lyrics.  Challenging parody.  As are most DMB tunes.

Dave Matthews returns to Pittsburgh on Friday, November 15.  It'll be his first time at PPG Paints Arena.

From 1994 to the present, Dave Matthews has two-stepped the Burgh an impressive 35 times.

Dave Matthews Band:

6-3-98, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
8-4-98, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
8-5-98, Polaris Amphitheater, Columbus, OH
6-3-99, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
6-4-99, Star Lake Amphitheatre, Burgettstown, PA
7-6-99, Desert Sky Pavilion, Phoenix, AZ
5-9-99, Civic Center, Charleston, WV
5-12-99, Gund Arena, Cleveland, OH
6-19-00, Polaris Amphitheatre, Columbus, OH
7-3-00, Three Rivers Stadium, Pittsburgh, PA
7-19-00, RFK Stadium, Washington, DC
12-7-00, Gund Arena, Cleveland, OH
4-4-02, MCI Center, Washington, DC
8-2-02, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
8-3-02, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
12-22-02, MCI Center, Washington, DC
6-26-03, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-27-03, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-26-04, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-27-04, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-4-05, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-5-05, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-10-06, Post Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
5-31-13, First Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-28-14, First Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
7-9-16, First Niagara Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA
6-1-18, Keybank Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

8-27-21, The Pavilion At Star Lake, Burgettstown, PA
6-21-23, The Pavilion At Star Lake, Burgettstown, PA

Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds:

1-23-99, Fisher Auditorium, Indiana, PA


9-21-02, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA (Farm Aid)


9-16-17, Keybank Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA (Farm Aid)

Dave Matthews Solo:

10-26-22, Stage AE (John Fetterman Rally), Pittsburgh, PA

Winery:

August 2017 - Blenheim Vineyards (Dave Mathews' Winery), Charlottesville, VA

The Big Lie 100: (#1915)

#2566.  Vance (Chance --- Big Country)

#2567.  Donald Trump Ain't Devout (That's What It's All About --- Brooks & Dunn)

#2568.  Royce White (Love Bites --- Judas Priest)

#2569.  Royce Isn't White (Fight For Your Right --- Beastie Boys)

#2570.  Trump's A Cunt (Light My Love --- Greta Van Fleet)

#2571.  Vincent Fong (We Belong --- Pat Benatar)

#2572.  Fong's A Clown (Long Way Down --- Goo Goo Dolls)

#2573.  Vincent Fong In Trump Tower (All Along The Watchtower --- Grateful Dead)

#2574.  Red Lobster (Rock Lobster --- B-52's)

#2575.  Robert Jr. (Way Cool Jr. --- Ratt)

#2576.  Daines The Cunt (Chains Of Love --- B.B. King)

#2577.  John McGuire (Light My Fire --- The Doors)

#2578.  John McGuire (Start The Fire --- Metal Church)

#2579.  John McGuire (I'm On Fire --- Bruce Springsteen)

#2580.  Bill Lee (Billy --- Judge Smails)

#2581.  McGuire (Crossfire --- Stevie Ray Vaughan & Double Trouble)

#2582.  McGuire (Live Wire --- Motley Crue)

#2583.  McGuire (Hang Wire --- Pixies)

#2584.  Tim Sheehy (Faithfully --- Journey) 

#2585.  No Tim Sheehy (No Sympathy --- Bob Marley)

#2586.  Joseph McGuire (Trial By Fire --- Testament)

#2587.  Tim Sheehy (Thirty Three --- Smashing Pumpkins)

#2588.  Jared's A Jew (No One Like You --- Scorpions)

#2589.  Kicker Harrison Butker (The Mother of All Fuckers --- Brian Jonestown Massacre)

#2590.  McGuire (Hang Fire --- Rolling Stones)

#2591.  Fuck Harrison Butker (Hello From The Gutter --- Overkill)

#2592.  U.S. Jews (U.S. Blues --- Grateful Dead)

#2593.  Jeff Van Drew (Black And Blue --- Van Halen)

#2594.  Alex Jones (Game Of Thrones --- HBO)

#2595.  Ed Martin (The Curtain --- Phish)

#2596.  Trumpin' (Women --- Def Leppard)

#2597.  Mike Roman (Bad Omen --- Megadeth) 

#2598.  Trump Is A Clown (Farewell For Now --- Greta Van Fleet)

#2599.  Sam Brown (This Town --- Neil Young)

#2600.  Sam Brown (Showdown --- E.L.O.)

#2601.  Sam Brown (Ghost Town --- The Vaccines)

#2602.  Sam Brown's A Clown (Don't Let Me Down --- The Beatles)

#2603.  Lies Of Nancy Mace (Eyes Without A Face --- Billy Idol)

#2604.  Trump Romancer (Tiny Dancer --- Elton John)

#2605.  Downing (Drowning --- Radio Company)

#2606.  Orange Prolapsin' Fart (Listen To Your Heart --- Roxette)

#2607.  Donald's Dildo Toys (Come On Feel The Noize --- Quiet Riot)

#2608.  Trump Dumps Ain't A Crime (One Day At A Time --- Cristy Lane)

#2609.  All You Need Is Trump (All You Need Is Love ---The Beatles)

#2610.  O'Brien (O'Brien --- Seinfeld episode)

#2611.  Tenney Is A Whore (Penny On The Floor --- The Clarks)

#2612.  Trump Is Great (Born Too Late --- The Clarks)

#2613.  Gabe (Babe --- Styx)

#2614.  Doug Burgum's A Cunt (I Want A New Drug --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#2615.  Pastor John Mark Burns (As the World Burns --- Kreator)

#2616.  Deepfake (Jailbreak --- Anthrax)

#2617.  Buckhout (Blackout --- Scorpions)

#2618.  Deepfaker (Heartbreaker --- Pat Benatar)

#2619.  Donald Trump (Tainted Love --- Soft Cell)

#2620.  Donald Trump (Icky Thump --- White Stripes)

#2621.  Steve Daines (The Plains --- Wilco)

#2622.  Deepfaker (Heartbreaker --- Free)

#2623.  Trump's A Clown (All Right Now --- Queen w/ Paul Rodgers)

#2624.  Donald Trump Is Tragic (Listen To The Music --- Doobie Brothers)

#2625.  Greenwood (Falsehood --- Alpha Wolf)

#2626.  Orange Prolapse (Built To Last --- Grateful Dead)

#2627.  The Donald's A Clown From Florida (The Devil Went Down To Georgia --- Charlie Daniels Band) 

#2628.  Trump Dump (Love Dump --- Static-X)

#2629.  Missouri Doctor Bob Onder (Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder --- Dean Martin)

#2630.  Bobb (Job --- Iggy Pop & The Stooges)

#2631.  Kremer (Dreamer --- Supertramp)

#2632.  Amy Fuckin' Kremer (Jesus, My Redeemer --- Chris Tomlin)

#2633.  Amy Kremer (Jesus Screamer --- Sodom)

#2634.  Donald Trump Is Shitty (Isn't It A Pity --- My Morning Jacket)

#2635.  McGuire (Crossfire --- Judas Priest)

#2636.  Arizona Cunt Nancy Cottle (If I Could Make Love To A Bottle --- Weird Al Yankovic)

#2637.  Cottle Fuck (Bottled Up --- DEVO)

#2638.  Grothman (Loves The Orange Prolapse --- Caution: Do Not Stop On Tracks --- Grateful Dead)

#2639.  Crooks Will Kill (Looks That Kill --- Motley Crue)

#2640.  Priebus Is Fuckin' White (Jesus Is Just Alright --- Doobie Brothers)

#2641.  Priebus (Jesus --- Velvet Underground)

#2642.  He'll Defend Donald Reince Priebus (What A Friend We Have In Jesus --- Alan Jackson)

#2643.  Priebus Cuming From A Stormy Wet Dream (Jesus Doesn't Want Me For A Sunbeam --- Nirvana)

#2644.  Rubio (I Don't Know --- Beastie Boys)

#2645.  Cao (Pow --- Beastie Boys)

#2646.  Kamala (Shambala --- Beastie Boys)

#2647.  Priebus Is Red (Jesus Is Dead --- The Exploited)

#2648.  Usha Vance (In A Trance --- Malcolm Todd)

#2649.  Donald's Jism (Aneurysm --- Nirvana)

#2650.  Rubio (I Don't Know --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2651.  Mark Green (Irene --- Grateful Dead)

#2652.  Cheatle Is A Fuckin' Cunt (Needle And The Damage Done --- Neil Young)

#2653.  Kimberly Cheatle (Everyday People --- Sly & The Family Stone)

#2654.  Timmy (Timmy --- South Park)

#2655.  Tim Burchett's Dick (Is Not Long) (Don't Forget Me: When I'm Gone --- Glass Tiger)

#2656.  Donald's Dumpin' (Gets Ya Pumpin' --- Bob Seger)

#2657.  J.D. Vance (Army Ants --- Stone Temple Pilots)

#2658.  Vance, Motherfucker, Vance! (Dance, Motherfucker, Dance! --- Violent Femmes)

#2659.  J.D. Vance (And We Danced --- The Hooters)

#2660.  Bitch Forty-Five (Switch 625 --- Def Leppard)

#2661.  Trumpin', Dumpin', Feedin' (Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin' --- Journey)

#2662.  Nancy Mace (Off My Face --- Justin Bieber)

#2663.  The Trump Towers (The Small Hours --- Metallica)

#2664.  News Faker (Jawbreaker --- Judas Priest)

#2665.  The V.P. Vance (The Safety Dance --- Men Without Hats)

#2666.  Heap (Creep --- Stone Temple Pilots)

#2667.  Heap (Creep --- Radiohead)

#2668.  Make America Great Again (Make America Great Again --- Brian Kelley)

#2669. 'Merican Nation (Terrapin Station --- Grateful Dead)

#2670.  Stormy's Chest Is Plastic On Fake News (I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues --- Elton John) 

#2671.  Senator Vance (Shut Up And Dance --- Walk The Moon)

#2672.  America (Hysteria --- Def Leppard)

#2673.  Steele (Deal --- Grateful Dead)

#2674.  Shitshow Paula Stark (Rainbow In The Dark --- Dio)

#2675.  Paula A. Stark (Shot In The Dark --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2676.  David Shoar (He's A Whore --- Cheap Trick)

#2677.  Tim Walz (Big Balls --- AC/DC)

#2678.  Trump Fucks You (I Thank You --- Bonnie Raitt)

#2679.  Big Lies And Adin Ross (Behind The Crooked Cross --- Slayer)

#2680.  Priebus (Jesus -- Phil Thompson)

#2681.  The Big Lie (Frizzle Fry --- Primus)

#2682.  Michelle Morrow (Broken Arrow --- Grateful Dead)

#2683.  The Orange Prolapse Stain (The Last Waltz Refrain --- The Band)

#2684.  Roger Stone (I Alone --- Live)

#2685.  Orange Prolapse Stain (Hamburger Train --- Primus)

#2686.  We'll Sever Donald's Bone (You'll Never Walk Alone --- Liverpool Anthem)

#2687.  Tim Walz Inspires (Great Balls Of Fire --- Chris Isaak)

#2688.  Donald's Fat (My Friend Fats --- Primus)

#2689.  Paula Allene Stark (Lurking In The Dark --- King Diamond)

#2690.  Priebus Stop The Steal (Jesus Take The Wheel --- Carrie Underwood)

#2691.  Kennedy Is Old (Ecstasy Of Gold --- Metallica)

#2692.  Spartz (Hearts --- Huey Lewis & The News)

#2693.  Kremer (Dreamer --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2694.  Robert F. Kennedy (Don't Be my Enemy --- Wang Chung)

#2695.  Far-Out Liz Murrill (About A Girl --- Nirvana)

#2696.  Gabbard (Shattered --- Rolling Stones)

#2697.  Sparks (Sparks --- Coldplay)

#2698.  Michael Sparks (Tiny Spark --- American Hi-Fi)

#2699.  Let's Stop The Stealing (That's How I Feeling --- Jack White)

#2700.  Robert Morris (Wordless Chorus --- My Morning Jacket)

#2701.  Gabbard (Shattered --- Dokken)

#2702.  McCormick (Ton Of Bricks --- Metal Church)

#2703.  Go To Hell (Top Yourself --- The Raconteurs)

#2704.  Taylor Greene (Stella Blue --- Grateful Dead)

#2705.  Peter Thiel (Pittsburgh Steel --- Warren Zeiders)

#2706.  Peter Thiel (Dipped In Steel --- Flaming Lips)

#2707.  Mahomes (Them Bones --- Alice In Chains)

#2708.  Thiel (Deal --- Grateful Dead)

#2709.  J.D. Vance (Take A Chance --- Eric Clapton) 

#2710.  J.D. Vance (Song And Dance --- John Cafferty & The Beaver Brown Band)

#2711.  An Ass: Donald Trump's The Orange Prolapse (He's Back: The Man Behind The Mask --- Alice Cooper)

#2712.  Fox News And Sean Hannity (The Frayed Ends Of Sanity --- Metallica)

#2713.  McDevotion (Sweet Emotion --- Aerosmith)

#2714.  J.D. Vance (Zero Chance --- Soundgarden)

#2715.  Jew (True --- Spandau Ballet)

#2716.  Donald Trump (One Pump Chump --- Steel Panther)

#2717.  Deb Fischer (Well-Wisher --- Single Mothers)

#2718.  O'Grady (Lady --- Styx)

#2719.  Insurrection (Operation --- Circle Jerks)

#2720.  Kushner Jew (Karma Stew --- Circle Jerks)

#2721.  Laura Loomer's In The White House (There's A Tumor In the White House --- Dan Mangan)

#2722.  Sean Hannity (My Sanity --- Bad Religion)

#2723.  Priebus, Scam And Fraud (Jesus, Lamb Of God --- Phil & Victor Thompson)

#2724.  Donald Trump's A Cunt And... (Gimme All Your Lovin' --- ZZ Top)

#2725.  Trump's A Cunt (War Begun --- My Morning Jacket)

#2726.  Kushner Screw (Under You --- Foo Fighters)

#2727.  Loomer's Bullshit (Rumor Has It --- Reba McEntire)

#2728.  Insurrection! (Strangulation! --- My Morning Jacket)

#2729.  Fight (Fight --- The Cure)

#2730.  Donald Is Fuckin' Inbred (Can't Get It Out Of My Head --- Electric Light Orchestra) 

#2731.  Tim DeFoor (Amateur --- Aimee Mann)

#2732.  Fight Fight Fight (Fight Fight Fight --- Riot)

#2733.  Hey Routh (Hey Jude --- The Beatles)

#2734.  Crank's Small (Crank Call --- Billy Idol)

#2735.  Trump Smells (Peace Sells --- Megadeth)

#2736.  Moore (More --- Simply Red)

#2737.  Routh (Ruth --- Glen Campbell)

#2738.  Moore... (More... Wilco)

#2739.  Wesley Routh (Baby Ruth --- John Prine)

#2740.  Liar (Fighter --- Jon Kahn)

#2741.  Kushner's A Jew (I Melt With You --- Modern English)

#2742.  Sheehy (Coffee --- David Allan Coe)

#2743.  Stormy's Chest (All The Best --- My Morning Jacket)

#2744.  Routh (Ruth --- The Toadies)

#2745.  Loomer's A Cunt (Rumor Of Love --- Berlin)

#2746.  Laura Loomer (There's A Rumor --- The August Empire)

#2747.  Ohio's Springfield Haitians (Buffalo Springfield Again --- Neil Young)

#2748.  Laura E. Loomer (I Heard A Rumour --- Bananarama)

#2749.  Springfield (Springfield --- Anathema)

#2750.  Reschenthaler's Crazy (Billion Dollar Babies --- Alice Cooper)

#2751.  Higgins (Big Guns --- Ruelle)

#2752.  Schneider (Spider --- They Might Be Giants)

#2753.  Lotter (Strutter --- Kiss)

#2754.  James Braid (Afraid --- Willie Nelson)

#2755.  Joke And A Cunt (Soak Up The Sun --- Sheryl Crow)

#2756.  'Cause The Donald Is (When The Circus Comes --- Phish)

#2757.  James Braid (Afraid --- Neko Case)

#2758.  Donald Trump's A Clown, JD's Too (It's All Over Now, Baby Blue --- Grateful Dead)

#2759.  Lance Wallnau Will Fuck You (Anyhow, I Love You --- Guy Clark)

#2760.  Kushner Is A Jew (I Would Die For You --- Prince)

#2761.  Donald's Not A King (Deny Everything --- Circle Jerks)

#2762.  Fight (Fight --- GWAR)

#2763.  Trump Is Gay (Touch Of Grey --- Grateful Dead)

#2764.  'Cause Donald Killed The Cops (The Music Never Stopped --- Grateful Dead)

#2765.  Netanyahu (Kalamazoo --- Primus)

#2766.  Usha Sucked His Dick (Such A Simple Thing --- Ray LaMontagne)

#2767.  Vance (Pants --- Charlie Worshum)

#2768.  Vance (Pants --- Randy Newman)

#2769.  JD Vance (My Romance --- Jesus Culture)

#2770.  JD Vance (My Romance --- Ella Fitzgerald)

#2771.  Derrick Anderson (Annie Get Your Gun --- Squeeze)

#2772.  Hannity (Sanity --- Killing Joke)

#2773.  Kushner's A Jew (It Beats 4 U --- My Morning Jacket) 

#2774.  McCormick (Sick, Sick, Sick --- Queens Of The Stone Age)

#2775.  Trump Is An Ass (Classical Gas --- Mason Williams)

#2776.  Vance Is White And Gay (Dance The Night Away --- Nitty Gritty Dirt Band)

#2777.  Salleigh Grubbs (King Of Clubs --- Pig Destroyer)

#2778.  Salleigh Grubbs (Three Of Clubs --- Hell Is For Heroes)

#2779.  Vance Is A Liar (Dance In The Fire --- Digital Summer)

#2780.  Bible (Tribal -- Nightwish)

#2781.  Trump Bible (Blood Libel --- GWAR)

#2782.  "Vanka's A Jew (Burnin' For You --- Blue Oyster Cult)

#2783.  Jared Is A Jew: Ivanka Is Too  (Everything I Do: I Do For You --- Bryan Adams)

#2784.  Ivanka: Is A Fucking Jew (I Can't Help: Falling In Love With You --- UB40)

#2785.  Vance JD (Dance With Me --- The Drifters)

#2786.  Donald J. Trump Is Gay (West L.A. Fadeaway --- Grateful Dead)

#2787.  Big Lie (Goodbye --- King Diamond)

#2788.  Big Lie (Goodbye --- Air Supply)

#2789.  Donald Trump Is Gay (What Would You Say --- Dave Matthews Band)

Please do not share this material with former President Donald J. Trump.