#392. Vladmir

One of the more obscure errors in movie history comes from Fast Times at Ridgemont High.  When Rat needs some dating advice from Damone, he receives the infamous "5 point plan."  At the very end Damone says, "Most important, when it comes down to making out, put on side 1 of Zeppelin IV." 

My entire ticket scalping career may have been patterned upon the methodology of Damone, but dude, Kashmir's on Physical Graffiti.  Not Zeppelin IV.

In other news, Joe Biden said he thinks Vladmir Putin is a "killer." 

But at the same time is looking forward to their summit in June. 

 

Vladmir
sonofsaf

Oh, he’s had enough of the human race
Makes me want to scream
In the 1980’s we all said face
A universal sin
Our mother land has been to outer space
Plutonium’s kinda mean
The Ukraine daze invade they masturbate
Overall they keeled

Right the wrong bring back the greatest race
You will live in fear
You’ll thank the lord Catherine the Great
No worries only fear

Oh, baby, would you mind
Oh, yeah, mama, you’ll be complyin’
Oh, ooh yes, would you mind
Mama, mama, you’re complyin’, complyin’

Orange prolapse is a clown
Donald Trump he ain’t sound
And his dick is not manned
His bullshit is so unplanned
Try to fart, try to fart and stop the steal

Oh, Trump ruined the norm of the human race
His nonsense makes you scream
Putin he kicks Moscow in the face
A Chernobyl dream
Like multi-billionaire oil tycoon
You’ll find he rarely bends
As the trust of votes to screw
You’re grooving with Vladmir

Oh, I am the hammer that pounds the nails
Terrorize your fears
All I envision is an anal pace
My dong bitch slaps your rear
Oh, fuck detente, war is here to stay, yeah
Pittsburgh has a pickle fest Clemente

Ooh, yeah yeah, oh, yeah yeah,
Trump’s a clown oh, yeah yeah, oh, yeah
Yeah, Trump’s a clown, a clown
Ooh, my baby, oh, my baby
Game of truth or dare
Come on, oh game of truth or dare
Game of truth or dare

Kashmir
Led Zeppelin

Oh, let the sun beat down upon my face
And stars fill my dream
I'm a traveler of both time and space
To be where I have been
To sit with elders of the gentle race
This world has seldom seen
They talk of days for which they sit and wait
All will be revealed

Talk in song from tongues of lilting grace
Sounds caress my ear
And not a word I heard could I relate
The story was quite clear

Oh, baby, I been blind
Oh, yeah, mama, there ain't no denyin'
Oh, ooh yes, I been blind
Mama, mama, ain't no denyin', no denyin'

All I see turns to brown
As the sun burns the ground
And my eyes fill with sand
As I scan this wasted land
Try to find, try to find the way I feel

Oh, pilot of the storm who leaves no trace
Like sorts inside a dream
Leave the path that led me to that place
Yellow desert stream
Like Shangri-la beneath the summer moon
I will return again
As the dust that floats finds you
We're moving through Kashmir

Oh, father of the four winds fill my sails
Cross the sea of years
With no provision but an open face
Along the straits of fear
Oh, when I want, when I'm on my way, yeah
And my feet wear my fickle way to stay

Ooh, yeah yeah, oh, yeah yeah,
But I'm down oh, yeah yeah, oh, yeah
Yeah, but I'm down, so down
Ooh, my baby, oh, my baby
Let me take you there
Come on, oh let me take you there
Let me take you there

Led Zeppelin oriented concerts:

3-25-95, Jimmy Page & Robert Plant, Civic Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
6-28-00, Jimmy Page w/ The Black Crowes, Post-Gazette Pavilion, Burgettstown, PA

Challenging song.  Lyrics were predictably a little choppy.

Please do not share this material with Russian President Vladmir Putin.  I have zero desire to be poisoned by beverage laced with plutonium.  However, if Putin were ever dead set on eliminating the cast members of Fast Times, may I humbly suggest rat poison.