A few days ago, Governor Jim Justice (R-WV) trounced the GOP competition in his primary for U.S. Senate.
Justice embraces the Orange Prolapse. |
He will face off against my former hometown's Mayor Glenn Elliot. Wheeling!
This is basically a David vs. Goliath contest. Size-wise, money-wise, etc. Expectations are that Justice will cruise to victory in the general and flip Joe Manchin's seat into the red column.
Sounds like the perfect race to test my "return to normalcy" theory grounded in the 1920 Warren Harding (R-OH) presidential victory over Democrat John Cox. Simply link Justice's love and admiration for Trump as "abnormal" and then expose his penchant for "abnormality" on four major hot-button issues: abortions, guns, crime, and immigration.
If you happen to know Mayor Elliot, tell him to gimme a ring and I'll explain the entire campaign strategy. Truth be told, it probably ain't enough to score him a Senate seat. However, I do think it would turn heads in the political arena and serve as an effective template for Democrats in more competitive swing states.
Jim Justice
sonofsaf
Donald’s a dope and clown, McDonald’s fan
Never hungover, Bud Light is for trans
Stormy D. ain’t cuming on her Lake Tahoe stay
Trump’s masturbating, mushroom is outta line
He isn’t funny, Trump Vodka ain’t fine
He is subscribing to Truth Social in every way
He’s biggie-sizing a McValue meal today
Legion of doom, the villains to blame
Fuckin’ bullshit, cause there is no shame
Jim Justice, and the big lies
You will discover
President Joe Biden’s crooked disguise
Jim Justice, loves Donald’s hair
You will uncover
All of the crime, that Forty-five has shared
Jim Justice, he’s my enemy
Fatter and older
The harm of guffaw West Virginia you’ll see
Jim Justice, another crime
Trump’s attraction, Stormy D.’s chest
Melania got burned on BeBest
Tahoe relations, Lake is shitty hooray
His dumb bowel movement, he’s dumb rejoice
Oath Keepers attack with dildo toys
Donald is shittin’, and the Orange Prolapse is gay
Legion of doom, the villains to blame
Fuckin’ bullshit, ‘cause there is no shame
Rough Justice
Uriah Heep
The gates have opened, now I'm a free man
My time is over, I need a new plan
But I've had no loving for a year and a day
My lady's waiting, got a taste for her wine
She's wearing money, but none of it's mine
She's been surviving while I've been wasting away
Back in my room, it ain't quite the same
You can't hide it, I'm onto your game
Rough Justice, there's no disguise
Losing my lover
And I can tell by the look in your eyes
Rough Justice, I've had my share
Looking for cover
I've done my time, but I'm still running scared
Rough Justice, coming down on me
Hand on my shoulder
Long arm of the law never setting me free
Rough Justice, I bide my time
Back in action, riding the crest
Putting all that I learned to the test
No complications, taking it day by day
Freedom of movement, freedom of choice
Free to be right back here with the boys
Ready to listen, but you've got nothing to say
Back in my room, it ain't quite the same
Just can't help it I'm part of your game
From 1972 to 2024, Uriah Heep has played the Burgh a grand total of 9 times. Never seen 'em.