#3195. Kristi Noem

Kosplay Kristi is one tough son of a bitch.

Keep in mind, Noem once boasted about executing her family dog Cricket.  She shot him in the face... much like Dick Cheney shot his quail hunting CEO buddy.  

Harry Whittington survived (barely).  A team of emergency physicians estimated "at least"150-200 pellets were lodged in his body.  Believe it or not, he would later issue a public apology to the former VP "for being in the wrong place at the wrong time." 

Poor Cricket was not as fortunate.  Her remains were dumped in a public landfill.

If I was the Trump administration, I'd be concerned about the potential for AI generated prison gang bang videos featuring Noem and Tren De Aragua.  Seems like they're unwittingly setting themselves up for a boner onslaught.

 

Regardless, let's present our beloved DHS Secretary with the coveted Orange Prolapse Award.

Well deserved.

In other news, I think we're going to check out Brit Floyd tonight at the Benedum.

 

Kristi Noem
sonofsaf

On your knees, more big lies, less Honest Abe
Alternative facts no common ground
Ass gaping, lies raping, dumb vaping, Stormy
Trump flags unfurled McDonald’s Quarter Pound

 

Stay At Home
Men At Work

Outside these, four walls lies, anarchy babe
Unnatural acts and sights abound
Glass glaring, eyes staring, young pairing, maybe
What does the world care if I'm not around

There were additional lyrics.  But I strictly conform to the information on the azlyrics website.

Men At Work played the Stanley Theatre twice back in 1982 and 1983.  Four decades later, they returned to the Burgh.  Last summer at Star Lake.  They'll be back again in Burgettstown on July 24 opening for Christopher Cross and Toto.  That one's probably a game-time decision.

Gnome Top 10:

#1.  Noem Sweet Noem: (Motley Crue --- Home Sweet Home)

#242.  Cumming Noem: (Scorpions --- Coming Home)

#249.  Sweet Noem South Dakota: (Lynyrd Skynyrd --- Sweet Home Alabama)

#301.  Welcome Noem Planetarium: (Metallica --- Welcome Home Sanitarium)

#302.  Who Says You Can't Blow Noem: (Bon Jovi --- Who Says You Can't Go Home)

#303.  Noem: (Daughtry --- Home)

#497.  Can't Stand Kristi Noem: (Blind Faith --- Can't Find My Way Home)

#515.  Fuck The Leech:  (Jane's Addiction --- Up The Beach)

#535.  Welcome Noem: (King Diamond --- Welcome Noem)

#536.  Noem: (Phish --- Foam)

#703.  Noem: (Unknown --- universal meditation mantra)

#704.  Asshole Noem: (Astrodome --- Houston ex-mayor, Roy Hofheinz)

#721.  I Haunt Kristi Noem (Me Want Honeycomb --- Post Mills marketing dept.)

#1009.  Noem (Home --- Foo Fighters)

#1319.  Kristi Noem's, Cunt Explodes (Take Me Home Country Roads --- John Denver)

#1813.  Kristi Noem (Kodachrome --- Paul Simon)

#1816.  Kristi Noem (Hell Is Chrome --- Wilco)

#2066.  Noem (Roam --- The B-52's)

#2148.  Kristi's, A Fucking Gnome (Mama, I'm Coming Home --- Ozzy Osbourne)

#2542.  Cricket's Fucked (Lick It Up --- Kiss)

#2544.  Cricket Has Died (Ticket To Ride --- The Beatles)

#3008.  Kristi Lynn Noem (Autumn In Rome --- Tony Bennett)

#3009.  Noem (Rome --- Destroyer)

#3011.  Kristi Lynn Noem (Under A Dome --- Of Monsters And Men)

#3016.  Kristi Noem (Heart Of Rome --- Elvis Presley)

#3025.  Noem Crust (Dome Rust --- Guided By Voiced)

#3046.  Noem (Rome --- Yeaslayer)

#3195.  Kristi Noem (Stay At Home --- Men At Work)

The Big Lie 100: (#2316)

#3000.  Kash (Stash --- Phish)

#3001.  Keith Sonderling (Jesus Is King --- Selah)

#3002.  Bannon (Cannon --- Jack White)

#3003.  Kash (Trash --- New York Dolls)

#3004.  Ashley Moody (Call Of Duty --- Anvil)

#3005.  Kash (Trash --- Silverchair)

#3006.  TikTok (Bangkok --- Destroyer)

#3007.  Michael Vrabel (God Is Able --- Planetshakers)

#3008.  Kristi Lynn Noem (Autumn In Rome --- Tony Bennett)

#3009.  Noem (Rome --- Destroyer)

#3010.  Mulligan's Big Lie (Mulligan's Big Lie --- Lin Manuel Miranda)

#3011.  Kristi Lynn Noem (Under A Dome --- Of Monsters And Men)

#3012.  Hegseth (Macbeth --- Frank Turner & Jon Snodgrass)

#3013.  Trumpin' & Dumpin' (Garden Of Eden --- Ratt)

#3014.  Trumpin' & Dumpin' (Garden Of Eden --- Harem Scarem)

#3015.  Trumpin' & Dumpin' (Garden Of Eden --- Paula Cole)

#3016.  Kristi Noem (Heart Of Rome --- Elvis Presley)

#3017.  Ivanka's A Cunt (Memories Of Love --- Chicago)

#3018.  The J-6 Hostages (Song For The Hostages --- Five For Fighting)

#3019.  Stormy D.'s A Cunt (Memory Of Love --- Elton John)

#3020.  Jeff Van Drew (Thru And Thru --- Rolling Stones)

#3021.  Jeff Van Drew (Not For You --- Pearl Jam)

#3022.  Daniel Ball (Alcohol --- Butthole Surfers)

#3023.  Oath Keeper Rhodes (So Many Roads --- Grateful Dead)

#3024.  Pardon (Garden --- Pearl Jam)

#3025.  Noem Crust (Dome Rust --- Guided by Voices)

#3026.  Trump Dumpin' Rage (The Golden Age --- Cracker)

#3027.  Trumpin' 'n Dumpin' (Garden Of Eden --- Chinchilla)

#3028.  Proud Boys (Bad Boys --- Inner Circle)

#3029.  Guy Reffitt (Forget It --- Rodriguez)

#3030.  Reffitt (Bullshit --- Guttermouth)

#3031.  Oath Keeper Rhodes (So Many Roads --- Joe Bonamassa)

#3032.  Trump Forever (Come Together --- Soundgarden)

#3033.  Trump Trump Trump (Dump Dump Dump --- Urge Overkill)

#3034.  Donald J. Trump's A Clown (Who Can It Be Now --- Men At Work)

#3035.  Proud Boys Will Defile (Bad Boys Running Wild --- Scorpions)

#3036.  Proud Boys (Bad Boys --- Whitesnake)

#3037.  Hegseth (Last Breath --- Low)

#3038.  Trump Wants A Tariff (I Shot The Sheriff --- Bob Marley & The Wailers)

#3039.  A Tariff (The Sheriff --- The Strumbellas)

#3040.  Andrew Kloster (Great Imposter --- The Fleetwoods)

#3041.  Go To Hell / Benjamin Black (Morning Bell / Amnesiac --- Radiohead)

#3042.  Netanyahu (Who's Cheatin' Who --- Alan Jackson)

#3043.  Trump's A Cunt (For Your Love --- The Yardbirds)

#3044.  Brendan Carr (Lucky Star --- Madonna)

#3045.  Marocco's Load (Tobacco Road --- David Lee Roth)

#3046.  Brendan Carr (lucky star --- Nessa Barrett)

#3047.  Noem (Rome --- Yeasayer)

#3048.  Brendan Carr (Superstar --- Social Distortion)

#3049.  FCC's Brendan Carr (You Are My Lucky Star --- Gene Kelly & Debbie Reynolds)

#3050. McClain (Insane --- The Hives)

#3051.  Paula White (Fly By Night --- Rush)

#3052.  Paula White (Candlelight --- The Mystery Writers)

#3053.  Paula White (Dynamite --- Son Volt)

#3054.  Elon Musk's DOGE (Holiday Road --- Lindsey Buckingham)

#3055.  Unanue (Day By Day --- The Hooters)

#3056.  Finland's Howard Brodie (On Top Of Old Smoky --- Burl Ives)

#3057.  Elon's DOGE (Vintage Clothes --- Paul McCartney)

#3058.  Paula White (Parasite --- Kiss)

#3059.  Brendan Carr (Caviar --- Wavves)

#3060.  Taake's Fuckin' Gay (Rocky Mountain Way --- Joe Walsh)

#3061.  Brendan Carr (lucky star --- Ricky Nelson)

#3062.  Whore Paula White's A Cunt (Your Inner Light Is Love --- Right Said Fred)

#3063.  The Biggest Lie (I Wonder Why --- Sha Na Na)

#3064.  Nancy Mace (Damage Case --- Motorhead)

#3065.  Emil Bove (Hello Hooray --- Alice Cooper)

#3066.  Paula White (Dynamite --- Mr. Kitty)

#3067.  Paula White (Dynamite --- Sly & The Family Stone)

#3068.  Kellogg (Black Dog --- Led Zeppelin)

#3069.  Kellogg (Hot Dog --- Elvis Presley)

#3070.  JD Vance (Take A Chance --- Olivia Newton-John & John Travolta)

#3071.  Kellogg (Hot Dog --- They Might Be Giants)

#3072.  JD Vance (Second Chance --- Lemonheads)

#3073.  Trance (Vance --- Screeching Weasel)

#3074.  JD Vance (Second Chance --- Don Williams)

#3075.  Kellogg (Hot Dog --- Mark Knopfler)

#3076.  JD Vance (If By Chance --- Patti LaBelle)

#3077.  Edward Robert Martin (Fightin' Fuckin' Fartin' --- Wheeler Walker Jr.)

#3078.  Vance (Dance --- Jesus Culture)

#3079.  Tucker (Sucker --- Marcus King)

#3080.  Congressman Hern's Pink Slime (If I Could Turn Back Time --- Cher)

#3081.  Turn! Turn! Turn!  (Hern! Hern! Hern! --- The Byrds)

#3082.  Hern's A Fuckin' Cunt (Turn My Back On Love --- Triumph)

#3083.  Hern's A Fuckin' Cunt (Turn It Into Love --- Kylie Minogue)

#3084.  Terry Cole (Rock And Roll --- Led Zeppelin)

#3085.  Tenney's A Piece Of Shit (Any Way You Want It --- The Ramones)

#3086.  Jack Posobiec (Right Side Of My Neck --- Faye Webster)

#3087.  JD Vance (Song And Dance --- Buck Owens)

#3088.  JD Vance (If By Chance --- Dean Martin)

#3089.  JD Vance (Take A Chance --- Chicago)

#3090.  Usha (Russia --- Tori Amos)

#3091.  JD Vance (Half A Chance --- Carly Simon)

#3092.  JD Vance (Half A Chance --- Vince Gill)

#3093.  Schimel Plan (Simple Man --- Lynyrd Skynyrd)

#3094.  Schimel (Simple --- Phish)

#3095.  Caine (Rain --- Planetshakers)

#3096.  Caine (Rain --- Skinny Puppy)

#3097.  Caine (Rain --- Rusted Root)

#3098.  Caine (Rain --- Grateful Dead)

#3099.  Dan Bongino (Love Casino --- Lenny Kravitz)

#3100.  Bongino (Casino --- Gleemer)

#3101.   Trumpin' Dumpin' Ass: He's Always Shittin' --- (Living Loving: She's Just A Woman --- Led Zeppelin)

#3102.  JD Vance (Song And Dance --- The Sound)

#3103.  Amy Gleason (Feels Like Treason --- Magnum)

#3104.  Jimmy Fuckin' Comer (Gary's Got A Boner --- The Replacements)

#3105.  Gleason (Reason --- The Cranberries)

#3106.  The Donald's Gay (This Is The Day --- The The)

#3107.  Dan Caine (Cocaine -- Eric Clapton)

#3108.  Ryan Woods (Damaged Goods --- Stabbing Westward)

#3109.  Cincinnati's Charlie Hustle (Colostomy Jigsaw Puzzle --- Cattle Decapitation)

#3110.  Charlie Hustle (Picture Puzzle --- Shirley Bassey)

#3111.  Marshall's Cock (Martial Law --- Ghostmane)

#3112.  Marshall's Cock (Martial Law --- Ookay)

#3113.  Floyd Joy Mayweather (Let's Stay Together --- Al Green)

#3114.  Brian Glenn (Now And Then --- The Beatles)

#3115.  Gleason Is A Cunt (Seasons In The Sun --- Terry Jacks)

#3116.  John Ratcliffe Baby (Take A Whiff On Me --- The Byrds)

#3117.  Hey Ukraine (Hey Nineteen --- Steely Dan)

#3118.  Hayden Haynes (Wooden Planes --- Art Garfunkel)

#3119.  Haynes (Chains --- Iggy Pop)

#3120.  Stormy's Tits Are Fake (When The Levee Breaks --- Led Zeppelin)

#3121.  Brian Glenn (Born Again --- Supergrass)

#3122.  Daughter-Wife (Afterlife --- Illenium)

#3123.  Dan Caine (The Chain --- Fleetwood Mac)

#3124.  Dan Bongino's Shitty (Cappuccino City --- Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever)

#3125.  Paula White (Parasite -- Volbeat)

#3126.  Dan Caine (Queen Jane --- Grateful Dead)

#3127.  Paula White (Dynamite --- Scorpions)

#3128.  Fuck JD Vance (Just One More Chance --- Dean Martin)

#3129.  Toilet Stall (Free For All --- Ted Nugent)

#3130.  Anal Hegseth (Angel Of Death --- Slayer)

#3131.  Bill Bazzi (Bumblebee --- Ween)

#3132.  White Cunt Of Bill Bazzi (Flight Of The Bumblebee --- The Alchemist)

#3133.  Clowns Of MAGA (South Of Heaven --- Slayer)

#3134.  Horseface (Racehorse --- Kelly Clarkson)

#3135.  Steak 'n Shake (Rattlesnake --- Live)

#3136.  Musk (Dusk --- Carbon Leaf)

#3137.  Cybertruck (Thunderstruck --- AC/DC)

#3138.  Elon's Cybertruck (Running Out Of Luck --- Mick Jagger)

#3139.  Cybertruck (What The Fuck --- Bill Wurtz)

#3140.  Cybertruck (What The Fuck --- Ryan Adams)

#3141.  Pete Hegseth (The Black Death --- Something Rotten! Original Broadway Soundtrack)

#3142.  Cybertruck (Out Of Luck --- Electric Light Orchestra)

#3143.  Trumpin' Dumpin' (Waken Baken --- Wiz Khalifa)

#3144.  Newt Gingrich (Eat The Rich --- Motorhead)

#3145.  The Noeming (The Gloaming --- Radiohead)

#3146.  Donald J. Trump (Here Comes The Grump --- Adam Ant)

#3147.  Donald Trump (Do The Rump --- The Black Keys)

#3148.  Flood (Blood --- Pearl Jam)

#3149.  Nvidia (Albania --- Coach from Cheers TV Sitcom)

#3150.  Eichorn (Stillborn --- Black Label Society)

#3151.  Michael Flood (Raining Blood)

#3152.  Flood Is A Whore (Blood On The Floor --- Fleetwood Mac)

#3153.  Cybertruck (Semi Truck --- Teenage Bottlerocket)

#3154.  Summer Lee (Summer Breeze --- Seals & Croft)

#3155.  Tom Homan (My Omen --- Electric Guest)

#3156.  Pete Hegseth (Final Death --- Death Angel)

#3157.  Cybertruck (I Will Truck --- Dirty Projectors)

#3158.  Liberation Day (Celebration Day --- Led Zeppelin)

#3159.  Easter Egg Roll (Head Like A Hole --- Nine Inch Nails)

#3160.  Flood (Blood --- Illenium & Foy Vance)

#3161.  Cybertruck (Chicken Truck --- Aaron Tippin)

#3162.  Brandon Beach (Up The Beach --- Jane's Addicition)

#3163.  Michael John Flood: Piece Of Shit --- (If You Want Blood: You Got It --- AC/DC)

#3164.  Signalgate (It's Too Late --- Carole King)

#3165.  Signalgate (Twist Of Fate --- Olivia Newton-John)

#3166.  Brnovich (Wicked Witch --- Beatsteaks)

#3167.  Brnovich (Virgin Witch --- Rob Zombie)

#3168.  Mark Brnovich (Son Of A Bitch --- EELS)

#3169.  Brnovich (Crazy Bitch --- Buckcherry)

#3170.  Sara A. Carter (Women Are Smarter --- Grateful Dead)

#3171.  Signalgate (Celebrate ---Simple Minds)

#3172.  Signalgate (Celebrate --- Don Moen)

#3173.  Signalgate (Celebrate --- Earth, Wind, And Fire)

#3174.  Signalgate (Twist Of Fate --- Destruction)

#3175.  Trumpin' Dumpin' (Gets Ya Pumpin' --- Bob Seger)

#3176.  Brad D. Schimel (Jack Be Nimble --- James Orchard Halliwell)

#3177.  Schimel Fuck (Cymbal Rush --- Thom Yorke)

#3178.  Flood Is A Fucking Whore (Blood On The Valley Whore --- Soundgarden)

#3179.  Liberation (Medication --- Son Volt)

#3180.  Liberation (Celebration --- Kool & The Gang)

#3181.  Liberation Song (Celebration Song --- Steve Miller Band)

#3182.  Donald's Liberation (Day Of Celebration --- Santana)

#3183.  Liberation (Celebration --- Krokus)

#3184.  Liberation Shitshow (Celebration Intro --- Christina Aguilera)

#3185.  Proud Boy (Rough Boy --- ZZ Top)

#3186.  Flood  Fucker (Bloodsucker --- Agnostic Front)

#3187.  Perry Greene's A Queer (Halloween All Year --- The Orwells)

#3188.  Brad Schimel (Ghost Symbol --- Zero 7)

#3189.  Michael Flood (Damn The Flood --- Black Label Society)

#3190.  Michael Flood (Theme From Flood --- They Might Be Giants)

#3191.  Robert Kennedy's Measles (The Lesser Of Two Evils --- Gary Stewart)

#3192.  Navarro (Tomorrow --- Death Cab For Cutie)

#3193.  Signalgate (Police State --- Agnostic Front)

#3194.  Flood (Blood --- Coheed & Cambria)

#3195.  Kristi Noem (Stay At Home --- Men At Work)

Please do not share this material with Kristi Noem  and/or  President Donald J. Trump.