Just ahead of the Super Bowl in early February, N'awlins Governor Jeff Landry devised a comprehensive plan to deal with the panhandling homeless population. He's moving all of them to a nearby abandoned warehouse.
Will the Orange Prolapse be attending this year's big game? Trump usually takes advantage of large televised crowds. You know, because everyone's there to see him. Hey, I'll willingly concede, he's quite the "rectum spectacle."
So in the aftermath of the New Year's truck-ramming, terrorist attack, Landry is promoting this mass relocation effort as a public safety imperative.
Hey Jeff, speaking of safety, what's your contingency plan if Elon posts... Just got off the phone with President Trump. A hijacked 747 might be targeting the Superdome. Get those fans outta there! NOW!!!
On second thought, don't sweat it. Nobody actually takes those two clowns seriously. Best case scenario, any incendiary real-time Tik-Tokkin' X-tweet like that would be "immediately" deleted. #FakeNews
Post-stampede of course.
Former Cowboys Coach Tom Landry could probably do a better job of addressing this hypothetical asymmetric generational warfare scenario.
Regrettably he passed away in 2000. Shortly before 9/11.
Jeffrey Landry
sonofsaf
Trump wanted pussy curtains of meat
Outta line he’s gonna cheat
Kissing that ring Orange Prolapse liar
Any wonder shit’s so dire
Jeffrey Landry Jeffrey Landry
Bought a Tesla from an Elon clown
Texas Space X gonna breakdown
Landry’s naked in the French Quarter
Trump’s defeat at the Southern border
Jeffrey Landry Jeffrey Landry
Oh
Jeffrey Landry oh oh
Gay
Jeffrey Landry
Landry
Jeffrey Landry
Elon Musk’s a clown
Landry wants a Kim Jong Un love letter
‘Cause Jeffrey Landry is a real go-getter
Silver spoon he should resign
Governor Landry commits crime
Jeffrey Landry Jeffrey Landry
Jeffrey Landry Jeffrey Landry
Yeah
So gay
Jeffrey Landry
Oh oh
Yeah...
I Want Candy
The Strangeloves
I know a girl who's tough but sweet
She's so fine she can't be beat
Got everything that I desire
Sets the summer sun on fire
I want candy I want candy
Ought to see her with her hair hung down
Ain't no finer girl in town
Candy's just what the doctor ordered
She's so sweet she makes my mouth water
I want candy I want candy
Oh
I want candy oh oh
Hey
I want candy
Candy
I want candy
With her hair hung down
Candy on the beach there's nothing better
But I like candy in slacks and a sweater
Some day soon I'll make you mine
Then I'll have candy all the time
I want candy I want candy
I want candy I want candy
Yeah
Hey hey
I want candy
Oh oh
Yeah...
A one-hit wonder from the mid 1960's. At the time, I was nonexistent.
This is my second parody of I Want Candy. A few years ago, I penned #472. I Hate Andy. (regarding Maryland Congressman Andy Harris)
To the best of my knowledge, The Strangeloves never played the Burgh. Apparently the band had a nasty case of Steel City estrangement.
The Big Lie 100: (#2123)
#2566. Vance (Chance — Big Country)
#2567. Donald Trump Ain’t Devout (That’s What It’s All About — Brooks And Dunn)
#2568. Royce White (Love Bites — Judas Priest)